Redhead ramblings

My Valentines

2012-02-14T18:03:00.000-06:00

I am a very blessed woman to have been given not one, but four valentines.

Jason, you are the love of my life. You make me feel special every single day. You are an amazing husband and a phenomenal father. Your passion for truth and justice makes us all strive to be better people.

Jacob, you have such a sweet spirit. You fiercely protect your two younger siblings and are SO talented. I pray that as you grow older you continue to protect your very sensitive heart. And remember, if any female tries to hurt you, I think your little sister may hurt them. :)

Andrew, I love your zest for life. You seek truth and have the innate ability to get straight to the heart of the issue. You adore your sister and idolize your brother. You're my awesome kitchen assistant and sister distractor.

Olivia, you are growing into such a hilarious little personality. Your laugh and smile are infectious. You have your daddy and bubbas in the palm of your hand. You may be small, but I can already see your "ginger" genes coming out. Your daddy and I are in trouble!

What more could a girl want, I ask you? These four have my heart.

And the fun continues!

2012-01-20T07:14:00.000-06:00

I just don't understand where the time goes. I mean, seriously. I find it very hard to believe that we have an almost 5 month old in our home. It really honestly seems like yesterday when we brought that little sprite home. A time where she stayed where you left her and slept 18+ hours of the day. When none of her clothes fit and I wanted to do nothing else than hold her all the time, whether she was sleeping or awake. Well, I still want to hold her all the time, but SO much has changed with our little beauty! At the doctor's office, she weighed 13lbs, 15oz and was 24 inches long. She's hanging out in the 25-50th percentile, but growing completely normal on her growth curve, so no one's worried! She's just a petite cutie! The girl loves to hear herself talk and enjoys rolling about the floor. She laughs and smiles all the time, making our household happy most of the day! She's eating homemade baby food and cereal at least 2 times a day and has tried sweet potatoes, carrots, peas, avocado, and bananas. This week, she's experienced her first case of the snot head and has developed an angry relationship with the bulb suction. She's on her way to growing out of her 3 month clothes, but still not quite big enough for 6 months ones...so that's a fun transition! Same goes for diapers...on her way out of 1 and trying to not have size 2 fall off! She went all the way through a church service last week without having to have me paged and even took a nap amidst all the nursery screamings! She is growing WAY too fast for this mommy.

Jacob and Andrew are coming over this weekend and I'm so excited! It's Andrew's 10th birthday today! Do you remember when you turned 10? I do. I remember waking up and being ecstatic that I now had a 2 digit age. We asked Andrew what he wanted to do for his birthday, and he enthusiastically declared that he wanted to go to the shooting range...so that's what we'll be doing on Saturday afternoon! He was pukey yesterday, so I didn't get a chance to ask him what kind of birthday cake he wanted. I love making cakes, even if I have zero decorating skills. Hey, they all taste the same going down, so my messy attempts will still be delicious! I'm very thankful that we're going to get to have him this weekend for our own family celebrations. Last year, we introduced him to trick candles...I guess we'll be kinder to him this year!

Work continues to go well. I am constantly reminded what an awesome company I work for, especially since Miss Olivia has arrived. My patients always are asking how she is and want to see her latest pictures. I work at 2 different clinics and have two amazing supervisors that are very flexible with my schedule. I will have been with this company for a year on Wednesday and couldn't have asked for a better experience! I will also have been a nurse for 7 years next week. WOWSERS. I remember the day that I took my nursing boards like it was yesterday. It was a Thursday morning. I drove to the testing facilty and got there earlier than I needed to. I sat in the car, prayed, and listened to Avalon's Testify to Love about 8 times in a row. I mustered up my courage and went in the test. The test is automatically generated as you take it so the more questions you answer correctly in a row, the harder the questions get. Once the test believes you have answered enough correctly, it shuts off. The minimum number of questions you'll have to answer is 75 and that's precisely the amount I had. When I hit the "next" key after answering the 75th question and my computer screen went black, I breathed a sigh of relief. Two days later, I decided to just "check" to see if my results were in. We had been told it would take 48 hours, but since my 48 hours fell on a Saturday, I didn't expect the results to be up. I paid my $9 to open the website and my eyes fell on that beautiful little word. PASS. I screamed, ran into the bathroom where my sister (who was living with me at the time), was showering and most likely scared her to death as I screamed I PASSED! I PASSED! Ah, it was a great day! Now, 7 years later, I have been blessed to work with many different kinds of patients and in different facilities. Nursing has been my niche and I'm very thankful I decided to take the leap of faith and change from teaching to nursing.

Thank you to all who prayed for Hannah's little brother, Knox. He did end up having surgery at 4 days old, but went home just a few days later! He's now spending his time getting big and fat, with a completely repaired heart. God is so amazing!

Thanks for checking in!

Happy 2012!

2012-01-04T08:07:00.000-06:00

Jason and I were just talking the other day about perspective. When I was probably a very early teenager, I couldn't quite imagine what life would be like in the year 2000 or even that we would get to that year. Now, it's 12 years past that and I remember that night that turned from 1999 to 2000 like it was yesterday. Wow. I feel old. 12 years ago, I had just graduated from LeTourneau and was in my first year of teaching junior high. Man, time does fly. Those sweet and gangly 7th graders are now in their early 20's and getting married and having babies. I'm old!

Jason and I rang in the new year quietly. We played a vicious game of Bible Trivia, a game he and I both have played for years and are fiercely competetive when playing. He beat me by the tiniest margin. Arg! We also played Scrabble which has become so much more hilarious since the creation of Words with Friends. My scores are now so much better! We didn't actually finish the game, but I was declared the winner. Family game night was how I grew up bringing in the new year. We would always start with this game that my parents got sometime in their college years, I believe. After that, the games varied, but usually consisted of Life and at least one other game. We'd eat queso, spinach dip, barbeque weenies, and a variety of other not so fancy, but oh so traditional Emerson New Years Eve foods. We'd watch the ball drop and scurry off to bed to await the next day and the Rose Parade (complete with my mother saying about every 10 minutes how much she despises the commercials and announcers). I was glad Jason and I decided to keep it low key this year. We went to bed sometime around 1 and spent our New Year's Day at church with the boys. It was wonderful!

Olivia Kaylynne is quite the character. Every day, I am amazed at what this child can do. She's decided that it's not necessary for her to consistantly roll over (even though we know she can), but she can get around the floor in her own way. It's always entertaining to see where she ends up. The child has absolutely found her voice and now likes to spend a great majority of her awake time screeching and squealing happily. She's been sleeping with her new fabulous "Baa Baa Lamb" sound machine (thank you Aunt Connie!), and I really think it helps her to block out some of the excess apartment noise and not wake up as easily in the middle of the night. We've started cereal and vegetables since the child is always acting hungry and it's been highly entertaining watching her devour them! So far, we've done oatmeal, sweet potatoes, bananas, and carrots. A few days ago, she had so many sweet potatoes up her nose that she sneezed them out for about a day. Hilarious! She's getting L O N G too! Our next doctor visit is the 13th and I just know she's probably grown another 2 inches. The majority of her 3 month clothes still fit, but she's starting to be too long for some of them. I still find it hard to believe how much she changes week by week. I was looking back at her newborn pictures the other day and was laughing because she was SO gangly and had little bird legs! Now, she's chubby, smiley, and getting so big! She loves her big bubbas and idolizes her daddy. Such a blessed little girl!

I would ask your prayers for a sweet little new friend of ours. Hannah's newest little brother, born 1/2/2012, was born with a narrowed aorta and a hole in the bottom 2 chambers of his heart. He's a big healthy boy otherwise! He will need to have surgery in the near future to correct this problem and should then have no issues. Please pray for Amanda and Jason as well as the rest of their family as they are taking care of this new little life. I can't imagine the stress of seeing another one of your children in the Cardiac ICU. This family is amazingly strong and has lifted up Knox to Jesus even before he was born!

2011 was an absolutely amazing year for my family. We were able to take the boys on their first airplane ride and vacation as a family. We welcomed Miss Olivia and have enjoyed watching her grow. I am constantly amazed at the blessings God has given me when I know I don't deserve them. What an amazing God I serve! My prayer for 2012 is that I show Jesus in all I do to the three little lives I have been gifted with.

A Merry Christmas to all...

2011-12-29T08:27:00.000-06:00

Whew! What an amazing Christmas week we had! We were so blessed to have the boys for the week before Christmas to do all kinds of fun and adventures! Here's just a snippet of what we did!

Jason, Olivia, and I went to get the boys on the 16th. We headed to downtown Fort Worth to take some Christmas pictures with the gigantic tree in downtown and in front of this massive collection of LED trees. It was cold and Olivia refused to wear socks but we got some great family shots. Jason's become an expert at the taking of pictures with the giant tree. Thanks to this, we were only outside in downtown for a short time. We warmed up by looking at Christmas lights and heading home for some hot chocolate with whipped cream and chocolate shavings. YUM!

Saturday, Andrew had practice at church for the performance the kids department would be doing in the service the next day. After he got home, we watched Christmas movies! He had a sleepover that night, so while he was gone, the rest of us watched one of MY favorite Christmas movies "The Christmas Toy". Yes, it's corny and outdated, but still one of my favorites!

Sunday, we all headed to get Andrew and then on to church! Andrew did an awesome job in the performance and even got to be one of the prop holders! It was so much fun watching him sing! We headed to a thrift store after church to get the final pieces of the costumes for the murder mystery dinner theater that my family would be doing later on in the week. It was actually a hilarious trip because during our searching through racks, someone actually came over the loudspeaker and asked if anyone knew if they had a Ouiji board! I certainly hope they didn't! That afternoon, we headed over to Dallas to celebrate my niece's 1st birthday party. Since my sister and her family live in Virginia, we weren't all able to go to her actual party, but this gathering was an awesome substitute. Jacob and Andrew really enjoyed hanging out with my brother in his fabulous Lord of the Rings/Star Wars/vintage Nintendo office.

Monday, I had to work. Thankfully, of all the days the boys were with us for Christmas, this was the ONLY one I had to work! Hooray for a job that gives me time off to be with family! Jason, Jacob, and Andrew headed out to play golf with my dad while Olivia hung out with my mom for the day. They ended up getting rained out on the 10th hole, but still had fun in the process.

Tuesday, we piled in the car and headed to Jason's mom's house in Denison. She had a Christmas dinner waiting for us and the kids were able to open their Christmas presents with her. It was a quick trip, but still fun and the roads were thankfully not too crowded there and back. After we got home, everyone was pretty tired so we played it low key for the rest of the night. Jason went and played "Santa" and picked up all the multitude of presents we had wrapped the previous week and were storing at his dad's house. The boys were both asleep when he got back so they were able to go to sleep with no presents under the tree and wake up in amazement at the collection!

Wednesday was our Christmas with the boys. The precious angels waited EVER so patiently until 8:30AM (hey, I could NEVER have waited that long...I have no idea how they did it!) to wake us up! We opened presents as a family and got to be a part of two very excited boys! Olivia was a noisy observer and mostly was intrigued by the red tissue paper! Jason's step mom came over with her presents for the boys and the Christmas fun continued! After all the opening and the eating of yummy breakfast, the boys were itching to spend their Christmas money. We headed out shopping and did find a few good deals. Jason made a full Christmas dinner complete with ham, dressing, corn, sweet potatoes, and mashed potatoes. YUM! We were stuffed!

Thursday we headed to my grandma's house in Wimberley! This was one of the things I had been itching to do since I met the boys. I just knew they would love roaming about the woods and seeing all the awesome stuff in my grandma's house. Her house is filled with treasures from all over the world that my grandparents collected during their time in the military. Olivia did amazingly well on her first long car trip and we made it down there without too many distractions. Olivia met my grandma for the first time and it was love at first sight.

Friday, we woke up nice and early (I mean, it's the country...it's just what you do!) and the boys were out the door to explore the woods. I kept seeing flashes of them and their Nerf guns go by. They were outside for several hours, even though it was FRIGID! They helped Jason and my dad with some "grandma chores", but were able to explore the entire 17 acres. We anxiously awaited the rest of the family's arrival. Michael, Jen, Kim, Evan, and Aubrey rolled in around 3 or so. My cousin Cory was the last to arrive around 5. Connie, mom, and I had been working on dinner items for the murder mystery dinner. Andrew and I made 2 pies (he's the best helper EVER!), a pecan pie and a pumpkin pie. SO fun! Promptly at 7, the festivities began and my family emerged from their respective dressing rooms clothed in 20's garb for the murder mystery dinner. One word: hilarious. My mom and sister in law were in full flapper regalia complete with fringe. My husband, father, and cousin were gangsters. My brother in law was a booze dealer. My sister was some sort of lounge singer. My brother was a crooked police chief. Andrew was a movie producer. Jacob was the mayor. I was the speakeasy owner. My aunt was the private investigator. SO MUCH FUN. Jacob and Andrew were a little nervous going in, but caught on REALLY quickly. They both did awesome.

Hilarious!

Saturday, we opened the Russell Christmas presents since we were heading back to Fort Worth that afternoon. After the opening, we packed up the car and the whole family headed to town. We adopt a needy family in the town every year and we were so blessed to deliver the Christmas gifts to them. It was a single mom and her three children who were SO very thankful. What an amazing way to show the boys the true meaning of Christmas. It's always one thing to talk about it, but a completely different thing to actually follow through. I think they enjoyed seeing the family so happy! We all went to town to eat lunch and then our family headed back home so the boys could be with their mother for the rest of Christmas Eve and Christmas day. It was very hard giving them up after having them for that amount of time. Olivia actually cried after they left. She loves all the attention they give her!

On Christmas, Jason, Olivia, and I spent the morning together and then headed out to his dad's house to a family dinner in the afternoon. His step mom was GLOWING as it was the first time she'd had all her kids for a Christmas dinner in several years. We deemed our Christmas traveling complete and spent the rest of the evening just the three of us in front of a warm fireplace.

Can you see why I started the update with WHEW? Jason and I keep talking about how much fun we had and how BLESSED we were to be able to share the days with the boys and the rest of our family. We were able to celebrate the true meaning of Christmas, the birth of our Lord and Savior. What an amazing experience!

Christmas spirit

2011-12-08T08:43:00.000-06:00

I love Christmas! I always have. I think you have to be silly to not love this time of year, yet it always amazes me how many people don't. To me, the spirit is contagious.

Christmas was always a big deal growing up. My siblings and I usually had some sort of countdown going, most often represented by one of those red and green paper chains. Our family took one whole Saturday to get our tree (always a real one!) and decorate the house. We would get SO very excited watching my mother unwrap all of our favorite ornaments each year. To this day, I still have my favorites: The glass Smurfette (of course we have a smurf. We're children of the 80's!), the miniature German figurines, Pinocchio (the German one, not the Disney one), and the one of me as an angel (don't laugh, I look precious!) are some of those. Michael, Kimberly, and I would always fight over the setting up of the nativity, most specificially whose camel got to sit up on the balcony of the stable. Yes, I realize it sounds silly, but it's tradition. Of course, no one would make a big deal out of switching their camel...it was more like a covert operation. Those were the days before DVR when you had to scour the TV guide (oh my gosh, the one on actual PAPER!) for the Christmas specials and you waited eagerly for Charlie Brown Christmas, Garfield Christmas, The Christmas Toy (a Jim Henson special...it's AWESOME), the Grinch, and It's a Wonderful Life to make their appearance.

This past weekend, Christmas has exploded into our house. There is literally NOT a space in the house that doesn't scream Christmas! The tree, the mantle, the bookshelves, the DVD cabinet, the bathroom counters, etc... Jason and I set up most of the apt on Thursday and eagerly awaited the boys weekend arrival to set up the tree. On Saturday, amidst the horrific cold and rain, we hiked out to get our tree. Yes, it was frigid and wet, but that didn't matter. We were successful and brought our tree home for beautification. Jason and Jacob hung lights, while Andrew decorated his miniature tree complete with lights and ornaments. Olivia pretty much just hung out and squirmed around on the floor (her new favorite pastime!) On Sunday, after the tree had all the water it wanted and the branches had fallen out, we went into decoration mode! It took quite a while, but at the end of the evening, we had a fabulous tree that took everyone's breath away!

The boys will be with us starting on the 16th and going through Christmas Eve. We have lots of fabulous plans! We'll be taking them down to the beautiful Christmas tree in downtown Fort Worth. Last year, we got some amazing pictures in front of both the massive Christmas tree and the menagerie of LED trees. Hopefully, Miss Olivia will decide to behave for pictures so we can get some good family shots! We've also got LOTS of Christmas movies to watch! It's always so much fun to snuggle up in blankets and air mattresses for the nightly movie-thon. We're also planning cooking baking and painting! Thursday morning, we'll pack up the car and head to my Grandma's house for a few days of merriment. The majority of my family will be there and I'll get to introduce Jacob and Andrew to the fun of Grandma's house at Christmastime. We'll head back home on Christmas Eve afternoon so the boys can spend Christmas with their mother. Jason, Olivia, and I will spend the day celebrating Olivia's first Christmas and preparing for the after Christmas decorating sales! We are not planning to be in the apartment next Christmas, so we're gonna need more decorations to revel in the merriment.

As the time gets closer, I get more and more excited to share the Christmas season with my husband and kiddos. Celebrating the birth of our Lord is such an amazing experience to share with family. I know Olivia won't understand any of it this year, but I still see the way she looks at the Christmas tree and it makes me very happy!

This weekend, we'll spend getting things finalized for the kiddos Christmas fun. I've got a wonderous grocery and Costco list going, so I'm sure that will be in the plan. Besides, I LOVE Costco during the holidays...so why not! :)

I hope your Christmas season is going as wonderfully as mine. Remember the true reason for the season...the birth of our LORD!

Giving of thanks

2011-11-23T08:30:00.000-06:00

2011 has been such an amazing year for our family. I have so much to be thankful for. I couldn't even begin to list all of it, but I thought I'd put down the highlights!

I am thankful for...
1. A husband who loves me unconditionally and makes me smile every day. He loves Jesus with all his heart and wants what is best for our family. I am amazed at the wonderful man God brought me.
2. Jacob! At 15, most boys would despise the "wicked stepmother", but Jacob and I get along swimmingly. He has such a tender heart. I wish I had a 10th of his musical talent! I always have such a good time with him, whether we're discussing music or his latest girl crush. I really enjoy seeing him with Olivia. He is so gentle with her and she absolutely eats it up.
3. Andrew! This almost 10 year old spitfire is usually either making me laugh or making my eyes get big and think "Where did he come up with that?". He is a mini-Jason and I see it SO much as he gets older. He's spunky and has an amazing sense of humor. He would be perfectly happy with his set of drumsticks and a pile of pillows that he will make into a drum set. I love watching him carry Olivia around and just parking her next to him so they can "hang out".
4. Olivia! This 12lb chub has brought a whole new dimension to my little family. It's so much fun watching 3 guys dote so heavily over one little girl. She is SO loved. She's such a good baby too. I try to remember that when she has moments of evening fussiness. She doesn't have colic. She doesn't reflux. She doesn't have a heart condition. She's absolutely perfect. God truly blessed us when he gave us that 5lb 10oz spitfire on August 25. She certainly came into the world dramatically and she has continued to form her own kind of drama. I still am in shock that she will be 3 months old on Friday.
5. A roof over our heads. It isn't the prettiest roof or the largest roof, but seeing as there are people who don't have one, I am certainly thankful. I am thankful for 600 square feet because it lets us be so close together, especially when the boys are home. There's no hiding out in a room far away from the rest of the family when there is limited space. Jason and I are planning to relocate by the time our lease is out next spring, but for now, I am just thankful we have what we do.
6. A job! In January, I was blessed to find this nursing job. I work with great nurses and amazing patients. Since I work out of two different clinics, I have two managers who are both so supportive of my family and great to work for.
7. Health! I had a "high risk" pregnancy with my lovely blood disorders, but I was so blessed to sail through under the protection of God and the watchful eye of my doctor. I had an emergency C-Section to get our daughter out ASAP, but neither she or I have any issues now.

I could go on and on. All of these above things are reason enough to get up every day and be thankful. I am the MOST thankful for my Savior. Because of HIM, I was given all those things. I was given the chance to be forever with HIM. In the end, that is the most important thing I have. It is my greatest blessing.

In just a blink

2011-11-08T07:55:00.000-06:00

Is November really here? Wasn't it just August and I was completely miserable and huge? Wow. Fast forward almost 11 weeks and that brings us to now! Whew!

Life continues to be good in the Russell household. I'm in my 4th week back at work and even though I don't like it, I am thankful for a job that is so low stress the majority of the time. I only have to work 3 days a week and then get to spend the remaining 4 being blessed by my family. My co-workers and patients are so good to let me show picture upon picture of the sweetness of our household.

Miss Olivia continues to amaze me. Now, I know I'm her mommy, but I seriously think she is the most beautiful baby I've ever seen. No prejudice there or anything! :) That aside, she is growing up WAY TOO FAST. She turns 11 weeks on Thursday and I never cease to be amazed by what she can do! Just in the last week or so, she has started laughing, batting at her toys, and just yesterday, she grabbed hold of a toy to play with it. She has 2 long sleep times during the night and naps a few times during the day. She's almost out of all her newborn clothes, and I really need to pack them away, but I can't bring myself to admit how big she is getting! She has a doctor's appointment this week, so it will be fun to see how long and heavy she has become!

Jacob and Andrew are still head over heels for this little sister of theirs. When they are over, someone is typically carrying her around or playing with her. The other day, we got home from church and Olivia was sleeping soundly in her car seat. I didn't take her out, but just let her sleep in the bedroom in the seat. About 10 minutes later, I hear "Olivia? Please wake up!" and about 5 minutes after that, Andrew came around the corner with her and said "She woke up and wanted me to take her out and play with her." We've been going to get them every Sunday that they aren't already at the house and taking them to church with us. They are really enjoying that! Our church has an amazing kids ministry, and Andrew is always bursting forth with what he learned that day. Jacob sits with us during the service and last week talked to the pastor about wanting to be baptized. Wahoo! :) Olivia just started going to the nursery and they LOVE her. In fact, when I dropped her off last week, the girl who took her said "Oh look guys! She's awake this week!"

I can't believe Thanksgiving is 2 weeks from Thursday! Jason and I are eating dinner with his family on Thursday. Friday, we'll be having Black Friday fun with my sister who gets to come visit from Virginia with Aubrey! Hooray! :) I'm pretty much guessing that Aubrey and Olivia's grandma will volunteer to watch them for part of the morning whilst we shop! Just a guess. :)

I suppose I should get on with my day. It's going to be a long one, compounded by the fact that at night, Miss O is falling asleep in my arms and then getting highly irritated and upset when she is put down to sleep. She loves her family too much to be put to bed, I guess! Thanks for reading and thanks for keeping our family in your thoughts and prayers.

Growing like a weed!

2011-10-21T08:32:00.000-05:00

I can not believe that another month has gone by. Our family has been having such a fun time that I haven't even had a moment to think!

Jacob and Andrew L O V E their little sister. They are completely smitten with her. I don't blame them since her dad and I are as well! She loves them too. When they left the other day, she was fussy for a good hour afterwards. It's absolutely precious!

Miss Olivia is almost 2 months old now and growing like a weed. She weighed 9.5lbs at her last appointment and was 21 inches long! Such a difference from the little thing we brought home from the hospital! She eats like a champ and is such a good baby! She usually only has one really fussy time during the day, but is otherwise very content. She's starting to really enjoy the play gym and being on her stomach. I'm breaking out more of her toys since she's starting to really watch and interact with them.

Jason and I continue to be blessed with our sweet family. God is truly watching over us and keeping us safe. I am so thankful.

2011-09-28T15:37:00.002-05:00

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A month gone by.

2011-09-25T08:23:00.000-05:00

Exactly 1 month ago, I was in terrible, terrible pain. I had just had my water broken and contractions were coming every 45 seconds. As most mothers will tell you though, the pain is a distant memory. What are my most vivid memories? Seeing that beautiful face for the first time and hearing her squawk so loudly that it turned my sad and worried tears into tears of joy.

And now a month has passed. Our little girl has changed so much! Of course, her main activities are still sleeping, eating, and pooping, but she's added some new ones. She will now watch faces intently. She has started smiling at a select few. She will lay on the floor and watch herself in the mirror. Her physical features are changing as well. Gone is the 5lb 4oz little waif we brought home from the hospital. I'm not quite sure how much she weighs now, but I know it's enough to have an adorable double chin! Her legs and arms are starting to get sweet little rolls and fat dimples. Her cheeks are filling out. She is beautiful.

She is SO very loved. Last weekend, her brothers were here and fell completely head over heels in love with her. Anytime there was a little whimper or cry, there was a brother shortly to her side. They wanted to hold her, feed her, and just love on her. No one is volunteering to change her yet, but I'll work on that. :) At the end of the weekend, Jacob declared that she was a good addition to the family. Andrew could not stop saying how much he loved her. Precious!

We're working hard on her sleeping and eating patterns, mostly by letting her dictate exactly what she wants to do when! I figure, there's no point in trying to get her on a schedule at this point! She's predictable enough to take shopping and we've only had one major meltdown so far. Of course, do you blame her? It was at Walmart and the checker was EVER so slow and she was HUNGRY. Nope. Not her fault at all!

We've loved listening to her little noises, watching her little expressions, and just experiencing her little life. So far, she's proving herself to be opinionated, just as she was inside of the womb. It's hard to go back to the time when she wasn't a part of our family and it hasn't been that long yet! Amazing.

For now, we'll continue to love these three little lives that God has blessed us with. What more could I ask for?

It feels like a year!

2011-09-08T00:05:00.000-05:00

Whew! I can't believe that our daughter is nearly 2 weeks old. The time seems to be flying by on some days, then other days, it seems like it's creeping along!

Olivia is doing wonderfully. She eats, sleeps, potties, and does all the things she's supposed to do like a champ. Jason and I can't seem to get enough of her! Her brothers keep asking about her, but because Andrew's had a weird sickness that he picked up at school, they haven't been able to come love on her. Hopefully the time of contagiousness will have passed and they can come spend time with her in the next week or so.

She doesn't go back to the pediatrician for another 3 weeks or so, but I'm pretty certain she's gaining weight like she should. She eats all the time, so I don't have any doubt that she is back up to her birth weight. I have to take her for her routine newborn screen on Friday, so I might stop in at the breastfeeding center at the hospital for a weight check. The lactation consultants are really sweet and said I could drop in at any time to see how she was doing!

Today was a big day for our sweet girl. She got to meet Hannah's mom! It was such a special time and I can't wait for her to get older so she can learn all about the amazing and strong little girl she is named for. Amanda brought Olivia the most special gift! In her very first hospitalization, Hannah received 2 stuffed animals from the gift shop. One had a heart that said "Hannah", the other said "Olivia". Our sweet Olivia is now the proud owner of that second stuffed animal. Stinkin' post partum hormones almost made me lose it. I am still constantly blown away by the love people have for our little girl.

I think the next week will continue to be low key. I got a glowing report at my 2 week up doctor visit. Considering how fast my c-section went, I am very thankful that all is healing as it should. I am still pretty uncomfortable at night, but I can see gradual improvements. YAY for that! With the change in the weather to beautiful cool temperatures, I need to start walking with Miss Olivia to continue the good recovery.

Thanks for checking in on us. Please keep Andrew in your prayers as he recovers from his sickness. We can't wait to all be together as a family!

Olivia's birth story

2011-08-31T23:33:00.000-05:00

She's here! She blasted into this world completely different than ANYONE anticipated, but she is safe and loved. And let me tell you the story!

As I've said before, we were scheduled for induction on Wednesday night, starting at 7PM. All our bags were packed, Liberty was dropped off at Aunt Connie's, and we headed to the hospital. We checked in, met our sweet nurse April, and readied for the night of fun to begin. They put Olivia's heart rate and contractions on the fetal monitor, placed the induction medicine, signed a whole bunch of forms, and starting the sit in.

I started having mild contractions with some discomfort, but not too bad. Jason and I watched TV, ate dinner, and just hung out. Around midnight, they checked me and found that my cervix had thinned out a bit, but still was dilated to a 1-2. They put in more medicine, and we waited. About 2:30, the nurse came in to adjust the monitor (Olivia's a fan of sneaking off the monitors) and during this fun, Miss Olivia decided to drop her heart rate from its normal 130-140 to 80's. Not fun. I was immediately put on oxygen, given fluid boluses, and flipped from side to side until her heart rate normalized. It only took a few minutes and the nurse went to go call the doctor and let him know of the feistiness of our daughter, which I'm certain he already knew! I WAS thankful that I had just asked for some pain medicine which would have had to be given IV. The IV was already in when they needed to do fluid boluses. Our doctor decided at that point we should start the pitocin a few hours earlier than planned, at 5AM.

At 5, the pitocin was started and we continued to try and rest. Around 5:30, it was turned up a notch and this is where it really started to be fun. Olivia told us she did NOT appreciate this medication and her heart rate dropped again. I was again flipped from side to side and given oxygen and fluid boluses. They also turned the pitocin off. Olivia's heart rate returned to normal and the quiet and peaceful resting continued. At 7:30, my doctor came in to break my water. This is where it became un fun and horrid. My contractions went from 4 minutes apart and mild to every 45 seconds and exceptionally intense. They were to the point where I had tears running down my cheeks and told the nurse to get the anesthesiologist in there ASAP because I wasn't able to handle it after about 5 minutes.

It took about 20 minutes to summon the anesthesiologist. I got my epidural and let me tell you what a relief that was. I was suddenly able to go through a contraction without crying! They were still about 45 seconds apart, but at that point, I could handle just about anything! Unfortunately, Olivia could not. Her heart rate dipped again and the nurses decided to put a heart monitor on her scalp. It showed a heart rate back down to the 80's. My doctor was called and told to get back to the hospital. I got bags and bags of fluid and there were suddenly 4 nurses in the room, each focusing on a different part of me. My doctor walked in the room and said "C-section NOW".

Within about 5 minutes, Jason was handed scrubs and I was being wheeled off to the operating room. I was prepped lightening fast, especially since they checked her heart rate again in the OR and found it to be still in the 80's. My doctor started cutting me open and Jason was let into the room to sit by my head. After less than 5 minutes, our daughter was plucked from my womb, carried by my head, and given to the NICU nurses who had been called down to check her out. After 25 very VERY long seconds, we heard the most beautiful sound. Two small coughs and the LOUDEST screeching wail I have ever heard! The tears of fear that had been rolling down my face turned to tears of joy. Jason took lots of pictures of our beautiful girl and then had a grand time watching the doctor sew me back up! I'd told him that they take the uterus out of the body, place it on the abdomen, and sew it up. Now he got to see it!

After she was cleaned up a bit, the nurses brought Olivia over to me and let me kiss her and then she and Jason went to the nursery to be checked out. I was sewn up and taken to the recovery room. They brought her in to eat and the sweet girl knew just what to do. God made babies so smart! After about an hour, I was wheeled to my post partum room while Jason helped bathe Olivia in the nursery. Jason's dad, step mom, and two sweet boys met me in the room while we all waited for them to bring in Olivia. She was then held by her two brothers, which had been Jason and I's plan all along. I was so thankful that an emergency c-section had not ruined that part of our plan! They were completely enamored. I don't think Andrew wanted to give her up!

The rest of the hospital stay was uneventful. Olivia got to meet SO many family members. Jacob and Andrew ended coming back over on Saturday because they wanted to spend more time with their sister. So precious. We ended up going home on Sunday, even though our sweet girl had a touch of jaundice. Since then, we've had appointments every day this week, mostly to check up on her. We had to get more blood drawn today because her levels had gone up again. She doesn't show any signs of being sick. She eats well, potties on cue, and is an absolute joy to have in our house. Jason has been the most amazing dad. He's such a pro at the baby love, diapering, and general caring for the whims of a post partum mommy. My mom has been here the last four days helping get caught up on the shopping, laundry, cooking, and just general loving on the baby. I feel better every day and am loving all the time with our special little girl.

So much happened so fast on the day of her birth, but I thought I'd list a few things that we are so thankful for.
1. A very pro-active labor and delivery nurse who was vigilant in checking on our sweet girl.
2. The foresight of our L&D nurse to start my IV when she did so I could get fluid when Olivia's heart rate dropped.
3. The fact that I had my epidural when I went to the OR. If I had not had it, I would have had to be put completely under anesthesia.
4. The lactation consultants at Harris HEB who were so supportive and helpful.
5. All the family and friends who have either stopped by, called, or texted their support and willingness to help us anyway they can.

Olivia has changed our family already. Andrew called the other day and asked if she missed him. I love that. I've gone from just me to a family of 5 in less than three years. How blessed am I? I love my life!

Thanks to everyone who supports our family. It means more to us than you know.

I don't know where she gets it....

2011-08-23T16:14:00.000-05:00

Oh Olivia. You are a sneaky and feisty girl. Your daddy and I love you so much already. I am so glad you have a spunky side. I know you will need this to keep up with your hilarious and ever active brothers. You are being born into a family that has both sides filled with craziness and spirit. I know, you just gotta keep up.

But, sweet girl, you've decided that you will come into this world in your own time and in your own way. We will let you. Why? Because we know that God has you in His perfect plan and it will happen exactly as He wants it to. Whether you wait to come when the doctor gives me medicine or you sneak out before that time, you are your own girl with a heavenly Father who loves you and knows the plans He already has for you.

So until that time, your daddy and I will continue to pray for your safe delivery. Your brothers will anxiously wait to hold you and love you.

You are so loved, wanted, and prayed for. You are a miracle that we are being blessed with. We can't wait.

So until that time when we meet you, either of your own accord or after we check into the hospital Wednesday night, please know that so many people are already loving you.

Love,

Your mommy

PS: Please try not to hurt mommy TOO much. :)

Same story, Second Verse

2011-08-17T14:39:00.000-05:00

Another week has flown by! Another doctor's appointment down, another Olivia report ready to go!

I obviously haven't given birth yet! She is happily sitting in the right position and getting lower every week. So low in fact, that my OB did not want to induce this week because he believes she may have it in her to come on her own. She weighed in at 6lb, 4oz with a beautifully strong heartbeat of 144. She is poised and ready to go. I am contracting like crazy and remain completely addicted to crunchy cubed ice (the Sonic ice!) and goldfish. The current plan is to go back to the doctor on Tuesday, assess the dilation level, and that will determine what time we are induced on Wednesday. If I'm not dilated at all, we'll check in Wednesday night. If I am, we'll be in around noon. I can tell from the way my OB is talking that he really wants her to come naturally and that he thinks she still may.

Big prayer request follows: I am on daily blood thinner shots for my blood clotting disorders. The catch 22 is that most anesthesiologists won't do an epidural on someone who has had a shot within 18-24 hours. So, the best case scenerio would be for me to go into labor in the evening so we don't do my shot that night. This way, I'll have had the proper amount of time between shots. As it stands now, my last shot will be Monday night in preparation for the Wednesday induction. If it is any sooner than the recommended 18 hours, the anesthesiologist is going to put up a fuss which scares me. I know God has Olivia in His ultimate plan and her birth story has already been written. It will happen the way He has designed and I just need to continue having faith that she is in His protection. If I can't have an epidural because it won't be safe, then I'll make it.

Jacob and Andrew are coming over this weekend, right before school starts for them on Tuesday. I'm so excited to see them! I'm hoping that I don't look like too much of a wimp with all the contraction fun. I hope they don't get too bored since I am not moving around town too much! I don't think they will...they just love being over here, even when we do nothing! I finished their vacation memory books last week and am so looking forward to seeing their faces when they start looking through them. What great memories! I still can't believe I did all that walking at 30 weeks and continue to be blessed at the grace that was shown to me by having nearly no discomfort during the trip!

So up until the time when we are joined by a beautiful baby girl, Jason and I will be spending lots of time together with the boys as a family and being thankful for a healthy pregnancy. We'll hole up together, watch movies, eat goodies, and wait for the next step in our lives as a family. How exciting!

Olivia 1, Mommy 0

2011-08-11T08:18:00.000-05:00

Let me just start by saying I am NOT a complainer. I pretty much go through life taking situations as they come and learning to handle them with God's help and the love and support of my friends and family. That being said, I am trying my very hardest to maintain this attitude during the last few days/weeks of my pregnancy. It is NOT easy. Compounded by the fact that the weather has been absolutely wretched, I don't feel fabulous. I am tired, sore, and generally miserable. When in nursing school and studying the effects of pregnancy on the female body, you read about how much stress and strain this growing life places on the mom. Elevated blood flow, exhaustion, inability to go more than 30 minutes without the bathroom, insomnia, etc. While I am doing my best to stay vertical and not in bed all day, Miss Olivia is growing beautifully and right on schedule. What a miracle that is! My husband told me this morning that I am a beautiful pregnant woman. This makes it all worthwhile.

At our appointment this week, she weighed a dainty 5lb, 14oz. We're thinking she'll be just under 6.5lbs at birth. I think she's going to be a long one since her daddy is tall, but we'll see. It feels like she's curled up pretty long inside me. Jason is guessing 18 inches. She's in the absolute perfect position to be born, her head facing down and right up against the exit door! So, the only thing we have to do at this time is wait. Since she had made some progress as to her positioning from last week, the doctor was hesitant to make any definite plans yet. I go in for another appointment on Tuesday and we'll make more decisions at that time, based both on what she's doing and what my body is doing in preparation for her arrival. Most likely, we'll schedule her to be induced either starting late Wednesday afternoon or early Thursday morning. My doctor would prefer to have her move things on her own, but there's just no telling what this little spitfire will decide.

Jason and I have been overwhelmingly blessed this past week by two baby showers thrown in Miss Olivia's honor. Saturday, Connie and Becca threw us the first. It was such a wonderful gathering of friends and family! I was thankful that Jason had brought the big SUV to cart all our stuff home in! It just barely fits in our little home. This little girl was blessed with so many amazing things...toys, clothes, necessities...you name it. It's very humbling. Just when I thought I had everything arranged and put away, I was thrown a surprise work shower on Monday! Wow! I left that shower almost in tears because of the kindness of others. I haven't completely figured out where all that stuff is going yet, but hopefully we'll still have room in the apt for Olivia! :)

I know as she gets older, she'll be told so many stories about the months of preparation and waiting for her arrival. No doubt one of the first will be the insane weather conditions we are having! We're on our 41st day of temperatures over 100. We will break the all-time record on Saturday which was set way back in 1980. What a summer to be in one's 3rd trimester...UGH!

Thank you for the continued support and love you show my family. Going from a single girl three years ago to a family of five in a matter of days has been a whirlwhind, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I am so blessed.

And the days tick right on by...

2011-08-04T08:54:00.000-05:00

Was I not just doing a post that started out with "I can't believe it's July?" For crying out loud, where did that month go? How have I finally reached the month where I'm going to give birth? Can my freak out officially begin now?

Wow. August. This is nuts. I am still in shock that the time has gone by so quickly, but it's nearly time. Our house tells me that she's almost here. Walking into the living room runs you into the swing, the bouncy seat, stroller, and car seat. Turning the corner into the bedroom sees her bed, piles upon piles of clothes, and other collections of baby gear. Even our closet is starting to overflow with the baby kingdom.

My body is absolutely telling me that she's almost here. I now waddle profusely, but I'm not really certain if it's just my hips loosening for labor or the fact that it feels better to do that so she stays off my sciatic nerve! I'm having daily contractions, some absolutely worse than others. I've had 2 nights when I though maybe it was the beginning of the end, but not quite yet. On her weekly sonogram yesterday, little bit weighed 5lb, 8 oz and all looked beautiful. I'm still not dilated or showing any signs that her arrival is imminent, but as all mommies know, this can change on a dime. The current plan is to let her come on her own, with a tentative induction date scheduled for the 17th or 18th. I would much rather not have this second option occur.

However and whenever Miss O decides to make her appearance, I think we're ready for her. My precious family and friends are having a shower for us on Saturday, so that will be tons of fun! Jacob and Andrew are excited as well. The plan is for them to be the first two (besides J and I obviously) to meet Olivia after she decides to appear. It's so important to cement our family as a group and I know this will be such a special time.

Please keep us in your prayers. I'm a pain-a-phobe and am not looking forward to that part of labor, although I know in the end, it will all be worth it. My sweet husband has been so wonderful already, and I know that he will be a great support and source of strength during that day. Pray for my doctor, the nurses, and everyone who will be in contact with our daughter both before and after she arrives.

Thank you for your continued prayers. They are so appreciated and welcomed. See you in a week!

Preparations

2011-07-28T08:14:00.000-05:00

There's a lot of preparations in the Russell household this week! On Tuesday, we went and picked up two eager boys for a few days this week while I was off! We went to Target and did EPIC school supply shopping! WOWSERS does that stuff get expensive! I think the companies just lure you in with their pencils for a quarter and paper for less than that. What they don't tell you is amidst the cheapness, they've jacked up the prices of things that used to be a reasonable cost...like backpacks. Anyone bought a backpack lately? Seriously? $40 for a good quality one? Ridiculous!

After the marathon shopping spree, we were all pretty worn out! We came home and decided to red box it for the night. We watched Rango, ate yummy popcorn, and fell asleep almost as soon as the movie ended! One of the most precious things that happened before the movie time was the discovery of Olivia's bed and all the gear that has trickled into our house over the last 2 weeks. I found Andrew looking through it several times saying "It's So SMALL!" and "Is it time yet for her to come? I want to hold her!"

Wednesday, we stuffed ourselves with pancake and bacon yumminess and headed out to Olivia's weekly check up. The boys got to watch her dance around on sonogram. She, in true diva fashion, put her hand over her face as if to say "Please, no more pictures!" It was hilarious! After the appointment, we went bowling and then came back to the house to enjoy the air conditioning. I'm telling you, 28+days of 100 degrees or higher is not pleasant for anyone!

As far as Miss Olivia is concerned, she is growing wonderfully! This week, she weighs a whopping 5lb, 2oz and her length/head measure about 36 weeks. I am not dilated or effaced yet, so all the fun contracting that she's been doing hasn't led to any progress yet. Tis okay though, the girl has time to cook! :) The doctor is watching her closely because of my multitude of blood disorder fun, but she's taking it like a champ. I have no doubt that she'll come when she's good and ready. After nights like last night where she doesn't do anything but wrestle around and endure contractions all night, I'm hoping that's sooner rather than later, but we're really in no rush.

I am still in shock that Monday is the first day of August. Where does the time go? UGH! The reality of our growing family is upon me and I can't WAIT to meet Olivia, but I'm also hesitant...if that makes sense :)

Guess I should get on with my day...the next few are busy ones! Thanks for praying for my family!

Protection, both inside and out

2011-07-23T08:56:00.002-05:00

As Olivia gets larger and decidedly more opinionated, I'm convinced she is my tiny little patience tester. I, of course, was the most angelic and perfect child, never once testing my parents patience. I'm certain they took one look at that head full of red curls and thought to themselves "This child is the supreme example of good behavior." Okay, now that I'm done crouching beneath the table for fear of lightening strikes, I'll continue.

Olivia LOVES to move. She's hardly ever still. I don't know where she's going to find the strength to sleep all day as a newborn, but I eagerly anticipate this time. She spends my waking hours rotating her rear end from the right side of my diaphram and ribs to the center and back again. She's quite the acrobat. There are times during the day when I have to lay down or sit up absolutely perfectly straight or I can't breathe. I have a beautiful lop-sided stomach, but then again, that's okay.

I think every parent worries about how to raise the gift that God has blessed them with. I know I do. I worry that I won't be a good example to Jacob, Andrew, and now Olivia. I worry that I won't be able to keep them safe and protected from the evils of the world until they are able to discern for themselves what is good vs evil. While Olivia grows inside me, I can protect her. She is formed enough now that all her parts are working well and could survive outside of my protective cave. There's a large part of me that wishes I could keep here inside, safe and sound. So what that I can't breathe? Or go for an hour without peeing? Or sleep without a pillow fortress? Or wear clothes without pregnancy panels (although I may never want to give those up anyway....SO comfy!)?

This is not what we have been charged to do as Christians. This is:

Psalm 22:6 "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

Deut 4:9: "Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them."

Whew! Scary, but if we want the next generation to fear the Lord, this is our charge. I pray every day (and multiple times during the day!) that I will do these things for these three little ones. They are only ours for a season, and Jason and I's desire is to train them to not just know of the Lord, but to KNOW HIM. It's an important task. Your continued prayers would be appreciated.

Beautiful girl

2011-07-15T18:02:00.000-05:00

She is beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. I can't stop looking at her pictures. Her daddy is in awe of how much she looks like her brothers. I am in awe that this amazingly and perfectly put together human is living inside me.

She is a feisty one, to say the least. She LOVES to push her rear end under my rib cage on the right side. She won't put it back down until I give it a reassuring pat and then she calms. She spends her days kicking my ribs and generally making me out of breath. It's a torture I am willing to endure to bring this gift into the world.

She's 34 weeks on Tuesday, ready to make her appearance in 4-6 weeks. Wow. Where has the time gone? It seems like just yesterday that I spent hours feeling my stomach, willing her to move so I could feel her. Now, in just the time it has taken to type this blog, I've been kicked and prodded at least 5 times. She is about to change her daddy, brothers, and my life forever. Wow. I'm at a loss for words.

Busy Busy Busy!

2011-07-13T10:43:00.000-05:00

Whew! It's been a crazy few days, but I'm not really certain that it's going to calm down any time soon. The weekend was a good one. We had lunch with my family on Sunday, including my sister and niece who were still in town. I picked the two of them up early Monday morning for some sister fun! We went shopping and just rambled around town. Kim had requested Jason make his divine biscuits and gravy for dinner, so we just hung out after the shopping, enjoying pool time and delicious food. I took her to the airport Tuesday morning for her flight back home. Unfortunately, that flight was diverted due to weather and it took her MUCH longer to get back to her husband and home, but she's safely there now.

Yesterday afternoon, Jason and I traipsed once again to the doctor's office for a visit and a sonogram check up of our sweet little girl. Since I am high risk due to my clotting disorders, the doctor wanted to check my placenta and umbilical cord to ensure there aren't any issues there. The sonographer was amazing and even switched over to the 4D view since we hadn't been able to catch little miss sneaky with our two other attempts. He called it the "Tuesday afternoon special"! We learned that our daughter is now head down and no longer breech! She decided to move on her own...what a huge blessing! :) She weighs 4 1/2 lbs and looked abolutely perfect. The images we saw of her beautiful face brought tears to both Jason and I's eyes as we saw her smoosh her sweet little face against the uterine wall. We got to see her breathing and opening and closing her mouth. The sonographer had a student with him so they were looking once again at all her important parts and finding that she truly is fearfuly and wonderfully made. In our meeting with the doctor, he is moving me now to once a week doctor visits with sonograms at each visit. He said he will NOT be letting me go past the 40 weeks, but would rather me deliver between 38-40. He doesn't want to have to induce labor because he'd rather let her come on her own, a plan that Jason and I both were very happy to hear. I continue to be thankful that we found this doctor when we needed to switch from my previous Dallas doctor. He really has a personal interest in his patients and their children.

I am working the rest of this week-Wed/Thurs/Friday and then off the weekend. I think the boys will be coming over in the next day or so, so we'll be able to have some fun times with them while I'm not working those few days! Yippee! I'm hoping to get some school supply shopping done in the next week or so, but we'll see. Andrew is going to a brand new school this year, and I'm not quite sure of his list yet. I LOVE to shop for school supplies, which is partly why we didn't just buy the school supply pack through the PTA! Jacob will be going to HIGH SCHOOL where they have no lockers and he gets to carry around his supplies in a back pack. I'm certain that will be an interesting situation. I'm guessing we're not going to know much of what he needs beyond the basics until after school starts. It's so amazing to see these sweet boys growing up and becoming young men.

I keep reading in my pregnancy emails that Miss Olivia's movement will be less as she continues to gain weight. I haven't noticed this yet. This little 4.5lb spitfire has become even more active if this is possible. I'm convinced she's just doing the opposite of what the "norm" is. I have no idea where she's received this trait. Mysterious.

Guess I should go think about something productive today. HA! Thanks for tuning in.

A week's adventures

2011-07-07T09:57:00.000-05:00

It has been busy around here, but then again, when is it not? I worked Tuesday through Friday of last week, then Jason and I went to my grandma's in Wimberley, then back home for a few days of rest before more work!

We had a great time at Grandma's house for the 4th of July! We left here on Saturday afternoon and traversed down by way of the kolache bakery of course! On Sunday, we had the opportunity to go with Grandma to the church patriotic service (complete with community band!) and the VFW Rodeo. The 4th was a lazy day, complete with TV fireworks (stupid burn ban)and grilling. We came home on Tuesday afternoon. The boys were with their mom for the 4th, but I know both of us wished they could experience the fun at grandma's. We played Catchphrase, ate ourselves silly, and just relaxed! Hopefully, they will get to enjoy the Goodman mayhem soon! We were all together for Andrew's birthday this year, and both boys had a great time!

We've actually gotten a lot accomplished since we got home on Tuesday. I've been meaning to clean out the area where Olivia will be sleeping, but just haven't had the time or energy. I got a renewed burst when we got home and folded all the laundry, cleaned the window sills and baseboards, and put all the junk away! Jason moved furniture, vacuumed, and put together her bed so we now have a place for our sweet little girl to sleep! I think my next step is to start organizing all her clothes and getting them washed! I have at least started thinking about the hospital bag and maybe that will get done in the next week or so.

My hours at work got switched around again, and I'm back to working 12 hour shifts. I'm not really sure what I think about this yet, but I do know that I'll be happy to only be working 3 shifts a week most of the time. I will have to pick up 1 weekend a month, but since those days are short, it won't be too terribly bad. My director has been great to do the schedule so I will normally only do 2 long days in a row. I have no idea when this little girl will decide she wants to come be with us, but I do know I do not have any intention of working myself into a labor situation! I am thankful for a low stress job that I get to sit down as much as I need to!

Since the 4D machine was broken last week, we won't be able to get that view of our little girl, but we will still get to see her sweet self on Tuesday. My OB is considering me "high risk" because of the blood clotting fun, and just wants to check to make sure everything looks ok. I don't have any problem with that! :)

Kimberly is in town until Tuesday! I'll probably go fetch her from Grandma's on Monday morning for a sleep-over and then to the airport on Tuesday morning. We had the opportunity to play with sweet little Aubrey in Wimberley this weekend and see the wonderful momma that Kim is. She is such a good baby! Her favorite toys of the weekend were a plastic spoon and a sponge! She's a cheap one!

Whew! It seems overwhelming when I go back and read all that's happened over the last week! Please keep praying for our little family...the prayers are greatly appreciated!

Completely and totally worth it!!

2011-06-28T10:37:00.000-05:00

Wow. I don't really know if there's another word in my vocabulary that can express the last 8 days so vividly. Jason and I have just been overwhelmed with how blessed we are. Seeing these two sweet boys experience all the "firsts" has been completely mind boggling. I will try to share all the magic with you, but I know that my human words will completely fall short of how much was experienced.

Monday: The start of the fun was at 4:30AM when we all got up and started getting ready for the adventure! My fabulous aunt graciously agreed to not only watch Liberty during our excursion, but also take us to the airport at 6AM. Thank goodness we live 5 minutes from the airport and didn't have to get up any earlier! Andrew was a ball of nerves but a quick trip to Walmart to get him a drawing notebook and pencils seemed to calm him down. We made it to the airport without a hitch, breezed through security, and got on our plane for the boys very first plane ride. I took an amazing video of Andrew experiencing take-off. He laughs harder than I've ever seen him laugh before! I think Jacob probably had the same thing going, but seeing as I was in the row ahead of them, I couldn't get both reactions. We landed in LA, grabbed our luggage and rent car, which was NOT waiting for us at the gate, much to Andrew's disappointment, and headed out to find food. In-and-Out Burger was the meal of champions (and much better since we only waited 5 minutes and not the 125 minutes that they are still experiencing in Frisco at the new one!) and decided that the boys just HAD to see the beach! We found our way to the Santa Monica pier and spent the next few hours splashing happily in the ocean and teaching the boys how to body surf the waves. It was a frigid 65 degrees (considering we had left TX at 100!), but the sun still kissed us a tad. I think I got the worst of anyone! We left the beach and headed to our hotel in Anaheim and checked in right in time to watch the Disney firework show out our balcony! What an amazing experience!

Tuesday: Disneyland adventures begin! Let me start out by saying this was not my first trip to a Disney park. I'd consider myself an expert...not to brag, but this was just one of my family's favorite vacation spots. Going so many times allowed me to have an idea of how to maneuver the parks the most efficient way possible! Introducing the Disney experience to two people who had no idea what to expect was phenomenal. Our hotel was a short walk away from the tram station so we didn't have to pay to park! We got there as the doors were opening and started the amazing day! I don't think the boys have walked that much in a day before! SO many cool rides and things to experience! I was able to go on quite a bit, but did have to miss out on some of my favorites. It absolutely did NOT matter though! Seeing those faces come off Space Mountain and Indiana Jones was enough! Everyone got the cherished Mickey Mouse ears, including Olivia's tiny pink set. We finished out the day around 9PM and dragged our tired and worn out bodies back to our hotel!

Wednesday: One of the boys favorite rides from the day before was the brand new 3D Star Wars ride, so we went back to the Disneyland park to ride it first thing. While we were there waiting to get on, we rode Andrew's favorite Haunted Mansion for the 3rd time. After the Star Wars ride, we went over to the Disney California Adventure park and rode fabulous things! Since that park is more new, it doesn't have quite the amount of rides as the original, so after we had conquered all at that park, we went right back over to Disneyland and rode more, including the 4th go at Haunted Mansion! :) The boys were SO exhausted, but kept right on trekking. I introduced them to the very fabulous Mickey Premium Ice Cream Bar, my absolute favorite thing to eat at the park. Because of my surgery, I wasn't able to enjoy one the last time I was there, but thanks to the pregnancy hormones, I took full advantage! I think the only downside to these two days was that the boys were wearing Converse shoes, not the best choice for L O N G days of walking, but they were so determined to have fun that we didn't hear much about it! Another fabulous night closed out with our watching the fireworks from our very convenient hotel balcony!

Thursday: Break day! We all slept in and caught up on some much needed body and foot rest! After checking out of our hotel, we headed south to the San Diego area for leg 2 of the adventure. We stopped to get the boys some actual tennis shoes (for which their feet were supremely thankful!) and found our way to our hotel in Escondido, CA. Our plan was to get a hotel in the middle of our adventures in San Diego without being right in the heart of the city. It actually turned out to be a great location! We spent the afternoon swimming in the pool and just relaxing. By this time in the trip, I think Jason and I had both heard about 25 "thank you SO much for taking us on this amazing trip". Precious. We found a great little sushi restaurant, which is what Andrew had been asking to eat for nearly 2 weeks. He devoured his spicy tuna roll in no time flat!

Friday: Legoland! I've been hearing about this park for years, but had never actually been there! I was pretty sure that the rides wouldn't be the same caliber as Disneyland, but knowing the two Lego fanatics that were with us, I wasn't worried. It did not disappoint! The park itself was smaller than a Disney park, the rides less flashy, but the Legos were AMAZING. They even had a brand new Star Wars lego section that had only recently been unveiled. The park was so detailed, even down to the name badges of the employees! We saw mini versions of Washington DC, Las Vegas, New Orleans, New York, and of course, the many planets found in Star Wars! Jacob and Andrew's eyes just kept getting bigger and bigger! We ended the day in the Lego gift shop, which you can imagine was absolute heaven! I had NO idea that there were that many lego sets available! Michael always loved Legos and had a TON, but seeing as he and I probably haven't put a lego set together since about 1991, it's grown quite a bit! :) Both boys were able to get a really cool Star Wars set (naturally!). This park closes early, which was a nice change from the very late evenings the previous days. We decided to go scope out some beaches for San Diego beach fun, so it was a relaxing car trip down the coast.

Saturday: San Diego ZOO! Andrew had been waiting all week for this day! He actually woke up without a hesitation and said "I've been alive for NINE years and today I actually get to see a live panda!" He was off the wall excited from the moment he opened his eyes! We made our way to the Zoo and spent the day experiencing one of the cleanest and most well done zoos in the nation. The highlight was definitely the pandas! We got to their exhibit at the absolute perfect time...right after the opening rush had left and before everyone else found their way back there! Normally, there is a line outside waiting to go into the exhibit and you only get about 5 minutes to watch. We got about 20-25 minutes and actually saw the youngest panda wake up, waddle around, and eat! Andrew's eyes were as big as saucers. By early evening, everyone was tired and hungry so we headed back to our hotel for a much deserved rest.

Sunday: We checked out of our San Diego hotel and headed to the beach we had scoped out two days before! La Jolla Shores is one of the most widely photographed Southern California beaches. Ever since their first beach experience on Monday, the boys had been itching to get back in the water! We spent several hours playing in the surf, and then walking to the cliffs on the north side of the beach. This is where I learned the hard way that Target sunscreen is GARBAGE. Even at a high SPF and when reapplied in the correct fashion, all of us were burned. RUDE! I hate that! We left the beach and made our way to a fabulous hole in the wall pizza place that Jason had discovered online. We were STARVED and scarfed down an ginormous pizza in no time flat! After dinner, we piled our sandy bodies back into the car for the trip back up to Los Angeles for one more night. After checking into our hotel, it didn't take long for the effects of the day of sunshine to hit and everyone got to sleep quickly.

Monday: The hotel we were at actually had good HOT breakfast (not just the sugar rush party of donuts and juice), so we got up a little earlier than we needed in order to take advantage of it. Afterwards, we packed up the suitcases (one completely full of dirty clothes!) and checked out of the hotel. It's become our tradition to take the boys to see the new Pixar movie of the year, so we found a local movie theater and saw Cars 2. SO cute! I especially loved the fact that the Pixar short was a Toy Story themed one! We ate lunch at a place that Jason's been raving about (Tommy's Hamburgers...and with good reason. YUM!), and headed to the airport to drop off our car and start the long process of getting home. We finally got back to our house at 11PM to one very excited (and slightly chunky, a hazard of Camp Aunt Connie) Liberty. The boys barely had the energy to make their beds before passing out for the night. Jason and I did some small things around the house and then passed out ourselves!

Today, I'm back at work, trying desperately to not think about being in vacation mode still! I wish I was at home with my family. Of course, my sweet husband is being the laundry fairy today and I think it's gonna be a very lazy day for all the boys.

My favorite parts of the week would be hard to pinpoint, but I will attempt to list them in no particular order:
1. Seeing the faces of Jacob and Andrew as they put their feet in the ocean for the first time in their lives.
2. Having Olivia create a small show for her brothers so they could both SEE her moving around and feel her antics. Her new favorite pose is to stick her butt up right under my rib cage and make me appear deformed as she maneuvers her way around. My stomach then resembles a camel's hump. Awesome.
3. Deep conversations about Jesus in the car on the way to and from each of our locations. Both Jason and I love making these boys THINK and use those very smart brains they have both been given.
4. Spending time laughing and just being silly with my family. It didn't have to be anywhere special or while doing anything important.

WHEW! Now you know why we're all exhausted today! Olivia did fabulously and only had a few times where she just told me that I was doing too much and needed a slow down time. She's still exceptionally active, but I have no earthly idea whether she's turned or not. Our next dr. appointment and sonogram is Thursday, so we'll see whether or not she chooses to behave. I'm hoping she does, but I'm not laying any bets on this fiesty girl of ours.

I'll leave you with my favorite picture of the week. At the beginning of this pregnancy, I wanted to really make sure that these boys bonded with their sister, even in utero. Oh believe me, they have. Not a day goes by where I don't hear how much they can't wait to meet her and what they are going to do with her. This picture just makes me smile.

Thanks for reading about our adventures. We're gonna keep it chill here for a little bit...

3.

The mayhem before....the even BIGGER mayhem!

2011-06-16T12:45:00.000-05:00

In my silly brain, I had imagined that this week would be a week of calm preparations. I would work, go to a class, and get all the cleaning/laundry done for our fabulous trip next week! The boys were coming over on Friday night and we'd spend the weekend finding fun places to go and eat while we weren't at theme parks. In talking to the boys last weekend, they both DESPERATELY wanted to come this past Sunday, stay the whole week, and just stay through vacation! I think that one week at home doing nothing got to them! So, Jason and I went grocery shopping last weekend to make sure we had the food in the house to feed those growing mouths and picked them up on Saturday afternoon. Gone was the week of calm before the storm, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Mind you, it's cramped, but homey. We have a 650 sq ft apartment, which sometimes feels small for just Jason and I. Now, put two growing boys in there and it gets REALLY fun! Having them here means we got to spend ALL day on Tuesday celebrating Jacob's 15th birthday! Whoo HOO! I love birthdays!! He opened presents, ate cake and ice cream, and went roaming around with Jason and Andrew until I got home from work.

Liberty just goes into happy dachshund shock while the boys are at the house. She always has a lap to jump into and most of the time, a hand giving her bits of goodness to snack on. She LOVES it. Yesterday, I came back from the pool while everyone else was finishing up and she sat at the door and whined until they both came inside. Pathetic.

And so, the countdown continues! We've got two VERY excited kiddos and two VERY excited parents! I get questions probably about 5 times a day about flying on the plane, and the rent car, and the parks, and....pretty much anything! Our plane leaves at 7:45AM on Monday, and I'm not sure there will be much sleep from anyone the night before!!!

We had our 7 month doctor appointment last Friday! Olivia did NOT behave for the 4D ultrasound because she is still breech. 75% of babies have turned by that point, but not our sweet girl! We did get to see a couple of quick pictures of her little face and her cute button nose. The doctor thinks everything is going swimmingly. My blood counts are a bit down, so that means I get to start the fantastic iron again, but otherwise goodness all around! I go back to the doctor in 2 weeks and hopefully we'll get our 4D at that point. We'll see if Miss Feisty decides to behave or not! The doctor wants to do another official sonogram the middle of July just to watch for additional bleeding/clotting. He said it's just a precaution because of my clotting disorder, and I would MUCH rather be overly safe with this little diva. She weighs a grand 2lb, 11oz and looks perfectly healthy at this point! She moves around most of the day, only sleeping for 15-20 min breaks at a time. She's SO active that I often catch Andrew staring at my stomach, just watching her thrash around in there! It's so sweet! He tells me all the time how much he can't WAIT to meet Olivia and how excited he is to hold her. It pretty much makes me cry every time he says it...stinkin' pregnancy hormones!

If you're my facebook friend, you can follow our exciting adventures next week as Jason and I chronicle our fun through the magic of the iPhone. Otherwise, stay tuned until we get home for the latest and greatest. Please keep our sweet family in your prayers as we go 1500 miles away. Prayers for safety and health would be greatly appreciated. Please pray for my stamina and for Olivia to continue to behave! Thanks in advance!

Blazing Inferno

2011-06-09T10:24:00.000-05:00

Oh, the Texas summers are HOT! Yep, I hear some of you, TECHNICALLY, summer hasn't begun yet. Ah well, I'm 28 weeks pregnant, feel as big as a house, and am HOT outside. So there!

The 3rd trimester is upon us, and I'm constantly attacked by emails with the most terrifying titles. I believe every baby website is programmed to hold their most earth shattering and unnerving titles until the pregnant woman actually begins to realize that this child DOES have to come out in the near future. Things like "11 terrifying pregnancy symptoms" or "The 8 signs that early labor is looming" really don't inspire me to confident living! I'm just waiting for the ones to start popping up "My baby was too big for my pelvis" and "Emergency labor situations". Oh good grief! It's no wonder women entering their 3rd trimester think that it might be better to just keep that little one safe inside. Of course, by the time the 8th and 9th month roll around, there's quite a shift in the thought process. "GET THIS OUT OF ME!"....especially when one is massively pregnant in the fabulous Texas summer!

Tomorrow, we go for our 7th month doctor visit and 4D Ultrasound. Yippee! I can't wait to get a small glimpse into what our daughter looks like. After that, the more frequent doctor visits commence. Whew! I know that it's for Olivia's good, but I do NOT like going to the doctor. It will be a test of my patience and determination! It is Jason and I's constant prayer that this little one continues to be healthy and grow as she should.

She's getting a lot more active as the days go on. The last day or two, she's been spending a LOT of time attacking my lower right quadrant of my abdomen, kind of where your appendix is. Just when I think she should be sleeping, I'm viciously kicked or elbowed. She's just SO wild! I'd much rather know she's always there then have her calm down and stay silent.

It's less than 2 weeks until Andrew and Jacob's first BIG family vacation! WHOO HOO! Everytime I talk to them, they are SO very excited! Our next big hurdle is making sure they actually have clothing packed that they can wear (not like the last time when Andrew brought one shirt, three shorts, and 1 pair of underwear!). They've been eagerly planning what they want to bring on the plane and what they want to do during take off...and the most important part, how to get to the bathroom while flying. I love calling them after we buy park tickets or book hotels because it just makes it more and more REAL for them! I have to start getting my "Mom" bag planned out with snacks and goodies for the parks. That part excites me! Maybe I need to start a vacation countdown checklist...

Today is Liberty Grace Emerson Russell's 9th birthday. I'm planning on a celebratory blog post about her, but I'd rather do it with pictures...which are at home and not available to me at the moment. So perhaps that will go up tonight or tomorrow. She's a patient girl, she'll wait to be immortalized on the web! :)

And once again, I've rambled for an inordinate amount of time about things that may seem trivial, but are very important to me and my family. Hope you enjoyed!

Times are flying

2011-06-03T07:38:00.001-05:00

Yep, it's June. I'd like to say that the time on this pregnancy is slowly ticking by, but it seems to be the complete opposite. I am almost 28 weeks and feeling P R E G N A N T. Last night, Jason and I watched the game at a friend's house and I actually had to put a pillow under my stomach for support. Ugh. And the summer's just begun! :) I actually have so much to be thankful for. I've been reading the facebook pages of my friends who are also pregnant and am reminded of how God is taking care of even the little things! I haven't been swollen to the point where I can't wear my rings. I didn't throw up my entire first trimester. I haven't had to buy a huge maternity wardrobe because I was blessed to have a sister who is about the same size and was pregnant right before me. So many blessings!

Last weekend, we were able to have a nice and calm Memorial Day weekend. Jason went to a golf tournament (courtesy of my brother and his gift of tickets!) while I basked in the glory of Food Network, air conditioning, and a dachshund who just wanted mom snuggle time. It was a very nice start to my week! Even better, I got paid 8 hours of work for sitting at home on Monday, so I've only had to work 8 hour shifts this week! Yippee! I think the plans for this weekend are also pretty tranquil, aside from the uber exciting car evaluations for our two sad little hail damaged cars. The most horrid thing about living in an apartment (apart from the no privacy and the elephants that live upstairs!) is that our cars are open to all the elements. This usually isn't a problem, but a week and a half ago, we were blessed with tennis ball sized hail that did quite a number on the bodies of the car, as well as their windshields. We do have a lot to be thankful for in that both cars are still able to be driven, but it's just another added cost that we were not planning on.

Plans for our California adventure are going swimmingly! We now have tickets for Disneyland! I squealed with excitement as those printed off! I may or may not have done a happy dance...but just maybe. I think aside from buying the Legoland/Zoo tickets, I just still have to find a hotel for the last night we're in LA. After that, it's all planned out and just WAITING for our adventure to start! SO excited! We leave in 2.5 weeks...WOW. I continue to pray for my own stamina and that I don't hold anyone up whilst I waddle through the Golden State!

The next two weeks are pretty much the same...work and more work. I do have next Friday off, but that day brings my 7 month OB check up and our 4D look at our little princess. YAY! Unfortunately, I think that check up also brings every 2 week visits instead of monthly...soon to be followed by WEEKL?Y check ups until little O's arrival. Whew. How did this point get here already?

Please keep my sweet little friend K in your prayers. He's currently hospitalized and his precious parents are so dedicated to figuring out what all is going with him! He is one of my favorite little guys and I want so much for his issues to be worked out so he can go back to being a mighty man!

Have a wonderful week!

Events and adventures

2011-05-23T16:22:00.000-05:00

Whew! It's been a week! I feel like we've been going non stop, which is pretty much the truth. I worked Sunday through Thursday and was VERY excited to have Friday through today off! Friday, Jason and I went to Andrew's school to eat lunch with him and watch his field day. He'd been asking since the week before, and even though it was raining, he called me and left a VM saying "um, you should still come 'cause it will be pretty fun!" We wouldn't have missed it for the world! He was so happy to introduce us to his class and his teacher, who told us he'd been talking about us coming all week! Precious! After school, we snatched him up and went to pick Jacob up from school. Jacob met us at the school office BEAMING because he'd been awarded the "Best 8th grade boy in choir" medal. He loves to sing and I'm pretty sure that aside from the girls, choir is the best part of 8th grade! We took both of them home and just relaxed the rest of the night.

Saturday, we got up and went to the Colonial golf tournament. The boys were really excited about it, and not surprising, their dad was too! I went with my "mom bag", filled with sunscreen, water bottles, and other necessities for a day spent in the smothering Texas humidity. We had a great time, but were rained out on the 18th hole right before the boys favorite golfer, Rickie Fowler, was set to play. We made our way back to the bus through the rain and came home. The rest of the day was spent drying off and getting clean. Sunday, Andrew had to be back home early to work on a rainforest project for school, so we dropped them off with their mom and headed to Costco, my favorite weekend hang out. I got lots of free samples...it's a bypass patient's dream! We also went to see Bridesmaids which nearly made me wet myself at least four times. Darn that pregnant tiny bladder!

Today has been a L-A-Z-Y day! We've had some whopper thunderstorms come through, which has delighted me! This allows for lounging about in my pajamas and watching Food Network all day whilst catching up on laundry. Tonight, we are going to Jacob's last middle school choir concert. I can't believe he's going to be in high school next year! Whew! Time FLIES!

Olivia has been up to her regular antics this weekend. Saturday, I guess she was tired of all the boy time and wanted to make her presence known. She was kicking my stomach SO hard that it was visible to all around. Andrew got to see it and I think his eyes got as big as saucers! "What was THAT?" That was your sister. "WHOA. She's strong!" Yep, she's a feisty little thing! He is so proud of her! He asks about her every time we talk. He's going to be an amazing big brother.

We leave for California in less than a month! AAHH! I am so excited to show those sweet boys what fun vacation is! It's going to be hard for me in parts since I won't be able to ride some of my favorite rides, but there's enough for me to ride and seeing their joy will take away any sadness! And really, there can't be any sadness at Disney!

I work the rest of this week, so that will be fun and games. I am still really enjoying the people I work with and the environment. It's nice to feel appreciated!

Thank you for your continued prayers for my sweet family. They are most appreciated!

My funny boys

2011-05-15T08:16:00.001-05:00

Jacob and Andrew are hilarious. Absolutely hilarious. They never cease to make me smile, laugh, or turn my head in the "huh?" position. Every time they have the opportunity to come be with us, we end up having a wonderful time, even if we're really not doing much. When I picked them up yesterday, Andrew looked at my belly and said "Woah. She got huge!" I laughed and asked him if he meant me or his sister. He quickly replied that I wasn't huge but Olivia's gotten so big that I really look pregnant. I was thinking the same thing, Andrew!

This weekend, my parents drove in from Houston since my mom had the day off of school on Friday. They wanted to take everyone to lunch on Saturday, including their two grandsons. Those boys really don't know a stranger. They can talk to anyone about anything! We went and met my parents, grandma, aunt and uncle, and another aunt for a fun meal of laughing and craziness. The boys fit right in and I think they had fun hearing stories about my childhood and telling the family about their own shenanigans!

After lunch, the four of us (and Olivia!) went home and watched Voyage of the Dawn Treader. It doesn't exactly follow the book to the tee, but really, what movie from a book does these days? It was still a cool movie! Jason and I were going to take the kiddos back home and then head to a graduation party we had already committed to. It ended up that the boys wanted to spend the night ("desperately!" in Andrew's words!), so they hung out with Liberty while we went to the party for a few hours. I guess they wore themselves out because they were both fast asleep when we got home.

This morning, I had to get up and go to work. Blah. Before I left, I got Liberty out of her bed and then got ready for the day. When I returned to the living room (where the boys sleep), I found Liberty snuggled up with Jacob and trying to share his pillow. It was supremely pathetic. The last sound I heard as I closed the front door was the thump, thump, thump of her very happy tail and the phrase "Lib, move over! You have to share the pillow!" HA!

This week will hopefully go by QUICKLY as I have a 4 day weekend coming up! Andrew asked me to come and eat lunch with him, so I'm planning to do that on Friday when he has field day. Then, I'll go find something to do for a few hours and go back to get both of them for a weekend where we don't have anything to do and can spend the weekend planning for our Disney trip!

I continue to be blessed to be a mom to these two. I am so thankful they have accepted me into their lives. My biggest prayer is that I continue to show them how special they are and how much their dad and I love them! Olivia truly will be the most blessed little sister in the world!

In other news...

2011-05-12T07:15:00.000-05:00

Thank goodness my glucose test was NORMAL! There was no way in this whole world that I would be repeating that torturous test...for ANY reason. I also started having some Braxton Hicks contractions, but I think that may have been caused by my lack of good water drinking for a few days! I normally drink 2 44 oz cups of water at work to keep myself flushed through, but since I was off for 4 days, I threw my system off. Once I corrected the problem, little Olivia has still been actively dancing, but there haven't been any contractions. I know those type of contractions are normal, but that doesn't mean they don't freak me out! :)

Jason and I have been working on our fabulous summer vacation plans for those two sweet boys. Every time we talk I get more and more excited! We're actually going the day after Father's Day, so what a precious gift for my sweet husband and the boys! The next time they are over to the house, we're going to sit down and see exactly what things they want to see while we are there. We've got some extra time in Los Angeles and are gonna try and do all the fun Hollywood stuff...the sign, the walk of fame...all the things that are on TV all the time and would be neat to say "I've been there!" As a complete foodie, I'm also trying to think of all the places I've seen on TV that I want to go visit. I know Jason's excited about this restaurant called Tommy's Hamburgers. I would LOVE to go to Pink's Hot Dog stand, but we'll see. Diners, Drive Ins and Dives is one of my favorite shows (and the boys love it too!), so we may investigate some of the places from it!

Well, I guess I'd better get moving...work is calling me! Thanks for all who tune in and read the random events of the Russell household!

Bypass Beware

2011-05-09T20:43:00.000-05:00

In 2008, I had my entire digestive system rerouted in the hopes that it would allow me to finally lose weight. It did the trick. 140lbs gone in 9 months! What it left me with is complete sugar intolerance and the inability to eat too much fatty food. No big deal! I can live with that!

When I realized I was pregnant, I suddenly noticed I was having sugar cravings, something I haven't had in almost 3 years. I was able to tolerate small bursts of sugary items because of the influx of pregnancy hormones. My doctor (who has also had weight loss surgery) said this is not unheard of, and that this will most likely go away after those surges are gone. Before pregnancy, I could probably only handle about 2-4 grams of sugar at a time, and sometimes not even that. NO sugar soda, no syrup, not even things like honey or agave syrup. I could do fruit sugar, but that was it. I can now do small bits of sugar, typically no more than about 25g of sugar at a time. Doing more means running to the potty (sorry about the TMI!) and horrid intestinal cramps. If I can avoid this torture, I absolutely will!

So when my doctor decided that it wouldn't be "that bad", even though I knew it would probably not be too fun for me, I defaulted to his judgement and that hopes that it would give information about my pregnancy that would be helpful. Oh heavens. I should have said no! Apparently, they were supposed to give me the drink to consume at home and then come in to the office. Thank goodness they did not because I would NEVER have made it. I started feeling icky about 2/3 through the 10 oz, 50g sugary torture device . In fact, I was on my way to the bathroom while drinking the last gulp and handing the container back to the nurse. The next few hours was badness, but I made it through! I will NEVER do that to myself again, so I hope everything turns out ok! :)

Other than the torture of the nasty orange badness, we also got another peek at our sweet girl. She was active as always, surprisingly laying side to side instead of her feet dancing on my bladder. She weighs 1 lb, 7oz which is simply perfect. I haven't gained much weight and what weight I am gaining is apparently all baby and baby growing apparati. She's a foot long, and extremely active (as if I didn't already know that part!). She is also "still a girl, NO penis". Awesome. So glad to know that! I still think it's amazing that the sono tech knew at 13 weeks who she was! I guess when you've been doing something for a long time, you should really know your stuff!

I'm free from the OB for another month, and then I'll have to move to every 2 week visits from that point on. I think once I hit 8 months, I go to weekly. UGH. I still can't believe that tomorrow marks the 6 month mark. We are so blessed to have this wee one growing for all that time. Keep up the good work, Olivia!

In typical fashion....

2011-05-07T19:30:00.000-05:00

Texas weather is BIZARRE. Last weekend, it was in the 40's at night. Today, it was over 90. I just don't even get it. Ah well, it's the price I pay for living here! Normally, I wouldn't mind except that yesterday evening, in typical apartment fashion, the air conditioner died...AGAIN! Of course, that's about the 5th time it's done it in the last 3 months. They just keep shoving freon into it and considering that "fixed". Cheap skates. Thankfully, since it was going to be in the 90's for the next few days, and the fact that I'm noticeably pregnant and crabby in heat, they brought over a window unit that is currently blasting freezing cold air! It's been getting so much nicer in here! I am thankful!

I am now working full time at my job and really enjoying it. I've moved locations, still the same company. It's been fun getting to know all the new people at this new location. The beauty of this new job is my boss is completely flexible with my hours! I'm actually off until Tuesday, and I am SO loving that!

Yesterday, we got a call from Andrew who wanted to know when he would get to see me because he has something to give me. I asked what it was, and he said it was a secret because of the special day on Sunday. This brought me to tears right in the car and I almost couldn't keep talking! Such a sweet boy. He also wanted to know how his acrobatic sister was doing!

We're in the middle of planning our family vacation for June. We've got plane tickets, hotel and car reservations, and two VERY excited little boys, as well as one estatic husband! It's going to be absolutely amazing seeing them experience this for the first time! Plans are in the works for a few days at Disney, Legoland, and the San Diego Zoo! YAY!

It's so amazing to me that I have so many friends right now that have either just HAD babies or are pregnant. How blessed we all are! It's nice to have a host of friends to go through this with! It's also amazing to have a husband who understands the craziness of pregnancy and has been through it before! I've been given such a wonderful gift!

Not sure what the rest of the weekend will hold, but I do know that relaxing will be involved! Monday morning, I have the dreaded glucose test at the OB's office. I am NOT NOT NOT looking forward to this. My hormones of pregnancy have allowed my bypassed intestines to tolerate more sugar that pre-pregnancy, but I have no idea how this will go down. It should be interesting, to say the least. We'll also have another ultrasound to look at our little girl. Hopefully the sono will be BEFORE the horrid sugar test! :)

Have a wonderful weekend!

An important milestone

2011-05-03T16:59:00.000-05:00

Raising children is all about milestones. When did they first roll over? When did they walk? Talk? We compare our children (whether knowlingly or not)to others around them.

Today, Olivia has reached an important milestone. She is VIABLE. She has reached a developmental age that she COULD live outside the womb if she had to. Of course, this would not be without much help and assistance, but she still COULD. WOW. I've been growing her for 23 weeks and in the last 2 weeks, she has become so much more real to me. I can feel her move and dance. I can see her kick my stomach. When I press my stomach in, she kicks back.

Just because she COULD live on the outside, doesn't mean I am ready for her to. I'd like her to stay happy and growing, for at least 15 more weeks or so. Unfortunately, it's not my decision, but I certainly put in a good word for that time frame!

Last night, Jason and I toured the hospital where Olivia will be born. I've been in TONS of Labor and Delivery rooms, but I literally had the breath taken out of me when we were there. It just made it so much more real! To know that in 3 months, I'll be in the shoes of the women that I saw last night. AAH! I'm not ready! I have no doubt I'll be MORE than ready to end the days and nights of hot torture, only to replace it with the days and nights of not sleeping. Seeing the room layouts are really good for me because it makes it easier for me to put together in my head. I can see Jason going to get Jacob and Andrew so they can be the first two people to hold their new sister. We saw the waiting room where our families will anxiously await the arrival of this new life. We saw the nursery and the doors of patient rooms who have recently opened their hearts to a new family member. Whew! Overwhelming!

Little baby things have started to make their way into the house. A giant box of clothes from my sister...baby gear from friends...some tiny onesies and ballerina socks that my husband bought. It's been fun! I end up finding all things little people in my house. An Andrew shirt stuffed under the laundry hamper, a Jacob sock under the chair, and now starting to find Olivia gear too. I LOVE finding these little treasures. Last summer, Andrew left a pair of socks and we sent them back to him in the mail (cause didn't you LOVE to get mail as a child?) with a note from Liberty. He called me the second he got it to tell me about it. Precious!

Thanks for tuning in again. These sometimes turn rambly, but then again, this is how my brain works...so it seems to fit. Have a wonderful week! Enjoy the weather! It's GORGEOUS!

Counting my blessings

2011-04-23T08:44:00.000-05:00

It's been one year since I decided to leave Children's....and what a year it has been! Sure, I've job hopped a little bit. I've had a complete turn around of my home situation. It has all served a purpose. Every little miniscule event.

Leaving Children's was one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made. It meant daring to imagine my life without the stability I had known for the last five years. It meant being a nurse without the safety net I had established for myself. It meant financial changes that I was not prepared for. But enough about the negative! It has taught me SO MANY THINGS! It has taught me to realize who my true friends are. These are the people who aren't my friends just because we work together, or because I take care of their children. I'll be honest, it has hurt to see the friendships that I thought were real fizzle away...messages unreturned, calls unanswered. As real as those friendships seemed at the time, it was an illusion. My true friends are the ones who are still around...through the thick and thin of my last year. The ones who have shared my joys and sorrows without judgement or opinions.

I've also learned that work is not who I am. It does not define me. It is a way to show the gifts I have been given, but even when I was not working, these gifts were still evident. In looking back, I can see an element of pride that needed to be sucked right on out of me. Believe me, the humbling I have received during the last year has taught me to realize what is really important. My husband, boys, and growing daughter are important. Work is not. Work is how I make my living and demonstrate the gifts I have been given, but even if I stopped being a nurse tomorrow, there would still be opportunities for me to share those God given talents with others.

After my period of being torn down, ripped apart, and rebuilt, God is choosing to bless me and my family once again. The job that I started in January has just offered me a promotion to full time guaranteed hours. Wow. Did NOT see that one coming! I have a simply phenomenal husband who sharpens me as iron sharpens iron, something this stubborn red-head greatly needs. I have two amazing/hilarious/precious sons who teach me how to be a good mom every day. I am growing Miss Olivia, who has already taught me patience and I'm certain will continue this task all of her life (I was a strong willed child, I don't have hopes of birthing one who isn't!) My family has a roof over our heads, food to eat, and a Savior who demonstrates to us that HE is powerful enough to provide. He is all we need.

As Easter approaches, I find more and more reasons to be amazed and blessed. To think that God would give his ONLY son for nasty, sinful, and ungrateful humans is mind-boggling. I know I wouldn't willingly give up Jacob, Andrew, or Olivia for anything. I can't imagine knowing exactly what we as humans were going to do to Jesus that God still followed through with his ultimate plan...but that's because HE is God and I am not. I am not going to understand it. My job is to be always grateful and thankful that someone died in my place so I can be with Jesus for all eternity. God didn't limit salvation to a chosen few...those with good jobs, a certain number of friends, or the ideal home situation. He opened it up to ANYONE who would call on the name of Jesus and accept the most perfect and unimaginable gift.

This weekend, I will continue to be thankful for what I have been given...an opportunity to work, an amazing husband, three beautiful children, and the chance to be with family. I am blessed.

She

2011-04-21T22:31:00.000-05:00

...loves to kick and squirm
...has a 4 chambered perfect heart with a normal aorta and outflow tracts
...opens her mouth, even in the womb, like she's trying to have a conversation
...has a stubborn streak like both her parents
...has already gained the nickname "spider monkey" by her brother Andrew
...is more awake at night than in the day
...still surprises me each time I feel her kick me
...is already daddy's little girl
...is loved by so many family members...grandparents, aunts, uncles, and so many more
...is named after one of the most precious and brave little girls I have ever known
...is also named for her grandmothers and mom
...weighs 1 pound
...has very long legs and likes to punch me right below the belly button
...is blessed to have 2 big brothers to protect her
...is fearfully and wonderfully made in the very image of God
...is Olivia Kaylynne Russell

Swooshing and Kicking

2011-04-17T15:14:00.000-05:00

The absolute highlight of this week has been the small, but increasingly powerful kicks that I am now feeling! I felt the first one on Friday, and today, they are getting more and more strong! What an incredible feeling!

It's absolutely hilarious to feel baby somersaulting across my stomach and then launching out with a giant (at least to them!) kick or punch in the uterine wall. Andrew and Jacob are here this weekend and Andrew even got to feel one of the wild kicking sprees this afternoon! Both Jason and I think it's so important to keep them as involved in the pregnancy as we can.

I went back to the doctor this week. Baby is growing right on schedule and heart beat continues to be strong. I go back in 4 weeks for the dreaded glucose test and another ultrasound. They were going try and squeeze us in, but the sonographer was all booked up. No gender sono for us until the 11th of May!

In a moment of frustration, I put on Facebook that they couldn't get us in and we were now going to be waiting another month to find out. A former preceptee from Children's messaged me saying she had a friend who was studying to be a sonographer and needed practice because she was currently in her OB rotation of training. PERFECT! I got in contact with her and she is going to do a sonogram on Thursday at 1! Whoo hoo! Here's hoping this tiny Russell does not continue to be as fiesty as previous sonograms! I still have really strong suspicion about who this child is, but it will be nice to have confirmation of that and start the collecting of clothing!

This week, I was blessed by the family of the sweet little boy and his sister that I watch about once a month. They gave us a whole bunch of baby items! Bouncers, jumpers, bath seats...you name it! They didn't need them anymore and wanted to bless someone! Jason and I are SO thankful. It's so wonderful to have friends that care!

Work has been busy, but I am still really enjoying it. I'm starting to see some of the same patients month after month. It's nice because I get to develop a relationship, but they are typically only there a few hours and don't come back for 4-8 weeks. It's also nice because the size of the clinic is small, and on days that I am just exhausted, I don't have very far to go! I've been working extra the past 2 weeks to help out with another nurse who is out for a funeral, so that will be a nice paycheck!

God has certainly been teacching me patience throughout this pregnancy, and I'm sure it's just a taste of what is to come with a tiny person. Hopefully, this week, I'll have more pictures of our little one and be able to introduce him/her to you by NAME!

The gift of thanks.

2011-04-09T09:18:00.002-05:00

I am carrying life, an absolutely precious gift that I do not deserve. Heck, I don't even deserve to be alive myself, let alone be granted the ability to grow a person. I was smacked in the face with this realization this week when my friend was sentenced to bedrest at 32 weeks. Thankfully, she is healthy, her son (who is currently still cooking, PTL) is healthy, and God has once again shown that He is ultimately in control and our plans are just fluff. Even though I was completely confident that God was protecting my friend's precious son, I started to worry about our little one. The horrible "What IF?" monster crept up and started to do a number on my psyche. A hundred scenarios started racing through my already crazed brain of all the things that could go wrong. I sat on the couch, held my ever largening stomach, and worried.

Pregnancy doesn't seem real when you pee on a stick and it comes back saying "pregnant". It starts to feel more real when you have that first ultrasound and see that tiny flickering light, like a beautiful beacon in the darkness that says "Hey! I'm alive!". Being shown all the beautifully and wonderfully made body parts by a sonographer and seeing your child do acrobatic flips around the screen moves it closer to reality. For me, it was sitting on my couch, hands around my stomach, and feeling the flutterings of one very stubborn and VERY loved Russell baby dance around from one side of my body to the other.

I have no idea what God has in store for this child. I do know that this child of ours is fulfilling the plan of God for both his/her life AND our lives as parents. As humans, we are not promised today, let alone the future! What does all my worry do? Nothing! Does it get me farther in life? Nope. Will my child be more healthy, smart, or more loved because of it? Absolutely no. Worry is STUPID. Just because I say this doesn't mean I always remember it. I do have moments of relapse, just as I did on Thursday evening. It doesn't help to watch the news and hear of all the chaos going on in our country and others. But ultimately, it doesn't matter. God is in control. He tells us this, over and over. Like the stubborn children we are, we don't like to listen or remember. He will still remind us. He reminded me, as I sat on my couch and felt life dance through me. Perhaps I just needed to remember His words "PEACE. BE STILL".

This morning, I decided to sit down and come up with a list of things I am thankful for. And aren't you lucky? You get to read it! :)

~A healthy baby with a perfectly formed body who is half way completed on Tuesday
~My tight scrub pants because that means this baby is growing as they should
~A wonderful and supportive husband
~Two beautiful boys who teach me every day what it is to be a mom
~Being born into the family I have
~Growing up learning every day about Jesus and how much He loves me
~Having friends from all parts of life...work, church, school, you name it!
~Being taught every day that my plans are not HIS plans

Oh, the list could go on forever. For now, I will continue to remember who created me, loves me, and always has the best plans for me, even when I don't know them. I will sit here, hold my growing middle, and be thankful.

Enormous

2011-04-03T09:48:00.000-05:00

This is exactly how I feel the last few days! Like a giant behemoth traipsing through life!

I got up yesterday to get ready for work. I put on my favorite scrub pants, noticing they felt a little more snug, but not really paying attention. Hey, that early in the morning, I'm lucky I'm putting on clothes that match. (Which is not a given considering my actions of last week!) I got to work, sat down in my work chair to open up patient charts and said "Huh. I'm not comfy". I went to the bathroom, looked in the mirror, and saw that my abdomen had most likely grown about 2 inches, seemingly overnight. There was NOT a comfortable position to be had in the offending pants. I suffered through the next four hours until I could get home and escape into less binding duds. It felt SO much better! These sad pants have been retired to the closet, where they will mournfully remain until the fall when I am no longer great with child.

I spent much of yesterday running outside with Liberty and watching a whole bunch of interesting programs on Netflix instant. Jason went on a fishing trip with a friend, so Lib and I have been enjoying the beautiful sunshine and balmy (but not yet blazing!) temperatures. For someone who has been FREEZING since about November, it was a very nice change!

My food cravings have been getting so much more WEIRD. Throughout the entire pregnancy, my body has craved Chinese food. Yesterday was no exception. Except this time, it was joined by a desperate need for Cheetos and ice cream. I'm weighing myself every week at work (so I use the same scale), and my body isn't showing evidence of the new feeling of enormous, but I can see a difference in my body shape. Weird.

Today will be much the same as yesterday, I believe. I'm finishing up at work and will head towards home to go ponder baby shower decorations for my friend Becca's shower next Sunday. I've never hosted a shower with this many people before, so it's odd to think that all I am responsible for is the decorations! I should probably head to the other few stores and scope out what they have, but since I have off Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, it doesn't seem as urgent!

I don't think there's much excitement going on in our lives this week, and that may be a welcome change. It's supposed to go from a high of 86 today to a high of 64 tomorrow..what's that all about? Texas is SO bizarre.

Anyways, thanks for stopping by to read the ramblings of a crazy pregnant woman.

Beautiful

2011-03-30T17:00:00.002-05:00

Our child is beautiful. Today, I cried on the ultrasound table as I saw our child's 4 chambered heart, with defined tricuspid and mitral valves and symmetrical ventricles. It was an amazing sight. We saw a perfectly formed stomach, brain, spine, and bladder. Two perfect kidneys. 8 ounces of miracle. I get choked up just typing about this beautiful child.

In true Emerson/Russell fashion, this miracle wanted to be mysterious for a while longer. In addition to all those beautiful parts, we saw two very tightly crossed legs and nothing else! The sono tech tried her hardest to get little one to behave, but there was none of that! We started the sono with our child upside down with his/her legs curled over the head and then acrobatics began! Never have I seen such dancing! A family friend used to call me "popcorn" as a child because I never stopped moving and I believe our child is carrying on this trait.

The mystery of gender will continue to be unknown for at least 2 more weeks. I have a regular doctor's appointment on the 14th and the sono tech said we could pop in for a "gender check". God is certainly teaching me patience!

For now, I will do my best to continue to grow this little one as best I can. All the pregnancy books say that the baby will double in size in the next three weeks, so I'd better make sure I'm giving him or her the best nutrition I possibly can...with the occasional peanut m&m thrown in!

I called Andrew and Jacob today to tell them that their brother or sister was so fiesty, and Andrew was so disappointed! We talked for a minute or two about other things and then he said "And so, let me guess....baby....GIRL???" The disappointment in his voice was so sweet! I know both of them are excited.

I don't have to go back to work until the weekend, and then I have three MORE days off before I go back on Thursday! What a nice relaxing week! Jason and I are doing to have dinner at my aunt's house, along with my cousin tomorrow night. SO fun! Other than that, it's going to be pretty low key around here for the next week.

Thank you for all your prayers for today's sonogram. I know that God has brought this little one this far and will continue to form his/her body to that completely beautiful one that we will meet in 4 and a half months! YIPPEE!

Miracle

2011-03-23T08:50:00.002-05:00

It's funny how a simple sound can be miraculous. It's not a loud sound or an overwhelming one, but very powerful just the same. It is the sweet, trong sound of my child's heart, beating happily inside of me. Now, I'm already discovering this child's stubborn streak! He or she did NOT wish to cooperate for the doctor and tried to hide from detection, but we were triumphant and were able to hear this little one after a good deal of searching.

I was blessed when I met and married Jason to become an instant mom to two sweet boys. These guys have been a joy to get to know. They make me smile every time I see them, and laugh until my sides hurt. They have so much of their daddy in them and I see bright flashes of this all the time. The talent that exudes from those two is phenomenal. These things make me so interested to meet this little one growing inside me. I feel so blessed to have been given a husband who has such an amazing fathering ability.

On Wednesday, we will get to get an in depth look at our little miracle. I'll get to see all those parts which God has fearfully and wonderfully made. I am so excited to see that wee 4 chambered heart, something I have been wanting to lay eyes on since we first knew this gift was coming into our lives. As a cardiac nurse, I can't say that the thought scares me a little, but as a Christian, I need to have peace in the fact that God has brought him or her to this point safely and will continue to provide for us.

So, next week, we'll have a little boy or girl to talk about by name. Clothes to start collecting. All the fun stuff! Jacob and Andrew change their minds every time I talk to them about what they want, sister or brother. This past weekend, Andrew told Jacob he was SO excited to meet his brother or sister so he could "teach 'em stuff". Jacob was slightly concerned that if he had a sister, he wouldn't be able to teach her to burp and make weird body noises. I assured him that sisters were just as capable to learn those skills as brothers were. He seemed fine after that! :)

Liberty and I are having a lazy day. It's 67 degrees outside and beautifully sunny. I ran a few errands this morning and now I'm enjoying the calm breezes and phenomenal temperatures. I go to work tomorrow and work every day until the sono on Wednesday. It's absolutely gonna make time go faster!

Until Wednesday...happy Spring!

Week of craziness!

2011-03-19T07:37:00.003-05:00

I am not sure I even had a chance to sit down this week! Whew! Jason and I headed out early Sunday morning for our mini-vacay in where, you ask? Delightful and fabulous LAS VEGAS! We had a simply amazing deal that we couldn't pass up and therefore took the opportunity to rest and relax in the city that never sleeps. We were able to walk up and down the strip, taking in all the opulence that so many people hold dear. Monday night, we went to a Cirque du Soleil show at our hotel. We had gone to one last year, and I thought it was amazing, but Jason really didn't enjoy it. This one was seriously different. It is one of the older Cirque shows, which means it is very VERY typical for the circus like atmosphere. There were so many amazing tricks and bodily feats! I don't know where they find performers like this, but it was simply wonderous to see what the human body is capable of. We both left the show raving and wishing we had the money to see it again! Jason was also able to play golf at a beautiful desert course while we were there. I didn't go with him, but the pictures were absolutely gorgeous. On Tuesday, we headed off the strip over to the Palms for our traditional "fancy" dinner. We ate at a beautiful restaurant and enjoyed the delicious steak and other goodies. While we were there, I saw John Besh, a chef from New Orleans that I've watched on Food Network and Top Chef. I was a tad star-struck! I should have asked for an autograph, but it really was not that kind of restaurant! Wednesday, we headed back home. Jason picked up a very excited Liberty from her Aunt Connie's house the next day and I started off my work week.

Since we were gone for 4 days, I'm not working the mega hours I normally do, but I still think I'm getting in 25 or so. Not bad for having a vacation and having to work! :) I make up for it next week though!

Jacob and Andrew are partying at our house this weekend, which is ALWAYS fun! Yesterday was Jason's birthday, so we celebrated with all his favorites...steak, asparagus, mashed potatoes, and yellow cake with chocolate icing! Delish! The boys have been camping with their mom all week, so I think at Andrew's request, we are going to Guitar Center this afternoon so he can play on the drums since "I'm in withdrawls, Stephanie!" It would be a much better weekend if our air conditioner was working, but in fabulous apartment life fashion, it's OUT AGAIN! Thankfully, when I woke up this morning, it was cool, almost cold in the house and everyone was snuggled up in blankets. I guess I forgot to put Liberty to bed last night because I found her snuggled with Jacob, looking quite guilty as I turned the corner and found her!

In other news, baby is doing well...as far as I know anyways! I haven't felt any movement this week, but I do know that my body parts are starting to shift about more and make me "look" pregnant in certain clothes! I weighed myself this morning and found that I've lost a little weight, but I think that may have been all the walking I did this week. In doing research for bypass patients, I'm still okay as far as weight gain, so I guess I shouldn't worry about it. I know this avocado sized baby is going to catch up in the next few weeks! All my pregnancy apps say that in the next three weeks, the baby is going to more than double in size, going from an avocado to a cantelope! YIKES! I go to the doctor for a regular check up on Tuesday, so we'll see what he says. I am blessed for the moment to have a doctor that has had weight loss surgery, so he is very particular about my special nutritional needs. I was able to stop taking additional iron pills the last time I saw him, so hopefully my levels have remained stable. I do NOT want to have to go that route again! :)

Please keep my sweet little friend K in your prayers. He's been hospitalized for 10 days with a NASTY couple of stomach viruses/bacterias. I know his mom and dad want nothing more for him to be stable enough to take home and away from the other nasty germs that the hospital has. He has made progress over the last few days, and I am so thankful! He is such a sweetheart!

My work schedule is a tad crazy this week, mostly because I'm helping out more at the other clinic and shifting my days to help a co-worker at my clinic. I work Sun/Mon/Wed/Fri/Sat. I'll be ever so thankful to have Tuesday and Thursday for possible sleep and most likely laundry/house cleaning fun!

Have a wonderful week!

Busy week!

2011-03-12T08:19:00.002-06:00

Whew! I can't believe it's already Saturday! I'm serious, where does the time go? I worked a lot this week, helping to fill in the gaps for the two clinics and I know it will pay off next week when I get paid!

My energy continues to get better as the days of the exhausting first trimester get farther and farther behind me. I'll be 16 weeks on Tuesday! 4 months down, 5 to go. I know that I'll be able to wrap my head around it much better after I find out who is living inside of me! Just to be able to call him or her by their name and be able to do some concrete planning (and SHOPPING!) will be wonderful! I go to the doctor on the 22nd and I'm excited to hear little one's heart beating happily! THe next milestones I'm excited about are being able to feel the dancing I know is going on in there and actually "looking" pregnant. I'm certain I'll wish I had put those two things off in the middle of the summer when this baby WON'T sit still and I look like a houseboat, but right now, I'm anticipating both!

Jason and I leave for vacation tomorrow and I can hardly wait! It's just a short little trip (Sunday through Wednesday), but it's vacation just the same! Liberty is anxiously awaiting her vacation at Aunt Connie's where she'll no doubt be spoiled and loved on beyond belief. It's always a bit of withdrawls when she comes home, but she LOVES her time being the center of everyone's universe!

After we get home, we will be able to have the boys for a long weekend before they go back to school. I always have SO much fun when they come over! Even if I have to work, it's so sweet when I leave because they always want to know exactly when I'm coming back home! I know Jason wants to take them to play golf one day and we'll probably go roaming around a park on Saturday. I can't wait for us to be living a little closer to them and to see this new little one idolize those big brothers!

I'm finishing up a very quiet yet busy shift this morning. I've got a full house, but everyone seems to need an extra nap today! The lights are down low, the televisions are on Food Network (hey, they chose that, NOT me!), and I'm all caught up on charting. Well okay, I take it back. I just had the NOISIEST patient come in. Everyone else is trying to sleep and he just keeps chattering away! He's sweet at least, so I don't mind...but I can't speak for the rest of the people! :)

Have an absolutely wonderful week...I know I will!

March? Really?

2011-03-06T08:51:00.002-06:00

Happy Sunday to you!

I am spending this early morning surrounded by patients and IV poles. It is once again frigid in North Texas, as the weather has changes for the 400th time this week! Two days ago, it was 80. When I got up this morning, it was 32. Awesome.

The past week has been a blur, but it seems like they are all starting to be that way. At the beginning of the week, I was convinced the cold weather was over. It has been near 80 all week and so sunny! Unfortunately, a cold front came through Friday night and we're now cold again. Well, cold for March in Texas that is!

Work is continuing to go well. I really enjoy the nurses I work with and it's proving to be a very good experience. I'm working close to full time hours, which exhausts me, but it's SO amazing to be doing nursing again after my short hiatus.

I also got the opportunity to play with my sweet little friend K and his sister this week! He has grown up so much and it made me tear up a bit to remember being there to tell his parents "we have a heart for your son" and then seeing him as a 3 and a half year old! WOW that makes me feel old. Everytime I go play with him, it makes me laugh because he has such a hilarious personality. This visit was filled with him having adventures all over the house with his two little alien toys. I have no idea what kinds of excitement they got into, but HE did and that was all that mattered. His sister and I were happy to play on the floor in whatever room he was currently adventuring in, and that seemed to be what he wanted us to do!

Jason and I had the opportunity to visit with some friends last night at a joint birthday party for anyone having a birthday in February and March. This party has become a yearly tradition for this group of friends. Every year, it's always fun to see the changes in the group...from relationship status, marriages, and new babies. Wow. Two years ago, I was barely in a new relationship. Last year, I was engaged. This year, expecting a baby. Life is amazing!

This week I've got work busyness and then trying to think about getting ready for Jason and I's trip on Sunday. WHOO HOO! I can't wait! If I could spend my entire year vacationing on someone else's dollar, that would be fabulous. But, since my sweetie and I have to live and work, I'll just be thankful for the vacations we do get to spend together either alone or with the kiddos!

If you have a moment, say a prayer for my sweet sister this week. She's headed back to work after her 3 months of staying home and being a new mommy. I know she's not really very excited about it, and even LESS excited about leaving Aubrey. She's an amazing teacher and I have no doubt she'll fall right back into the groove of things, but right now, she's a little overwhelmed!

Thanks for coming to hang out in my little corner of the web. :)

Home again, home again....

2011-02-27T08:07:00.003-06:00

Whew! Can't believe it's almost been a week since I got home from Virginia! Again I ask, where does the time go? Seriously!

I had an absolutely wonderful time with my sister and her family. I got a crash course in being a mommy and loved every minute of it. It's still a weird thought to think of my sister as a mom, but she does a stellar job and she and her husband love that sweet baby to pieces. Aubrey is like a mini-Kim, so it's really funny to see some of Kimberly's personality traits coming out in this almost 3 month old baby! The three of us ventured back to the DC area to take me to the airport and I got to help baby clothes shop. Well, I didn't really help, I just got to hold the baby! Of course, the beauty of being the aunt is that you can just hand the baby back when the diaper explodes!

Since being home, I've been working hard at my new job. I absolutely love this job! It's the perfect combination of highly skilled nursing and hospital busy, but not the stress. I work mainly at one clinic with two other nurses, but help out at the other one when they need it. It started out as being just part time, but I've managed to get full time hours by helping out at the other clinic. It has been an absolute blessing.

Jason and I have started the uber fun task of picking stuff out for wee one Russell. We spent a long time at Target yesterday looking at strollers, car seats, breast pumps, you name it. SO MUCH STUFF! It's insanity that someone who is now 3 inches long and the size of a lemon needs this much gear! I will be 14 weeks on Tuesday....whew! I'm holding myself back from too much shopping until I find out the sex of the baby, which should be at the end of March. The sonographer already says he knows, but I'd rather go with the sono of an older baby! Jason and I have our predictions, but we'll see!

The next few weeks will be busy busy busy! I've got lots of hours scheduled and even some play time with my sweet little friend K and his sister! Jason and I are taking our last just the two of us mini trip for awhile in a few weeks...and I can't wait! We had been saving and pinching for the trip and finally got the last little bit this week. After that, it will be nothing but work and saving for our first family vacation, which will hopefully be to Disney World with the boys in June! It will be an interesting trip, seeing as I'll be about 28 weeks pregnant and not able to go on some of my favorite rides! It won't matter a bit because our two sweet boys have NEVER been there and I will get to see the eyes of a first time Disney experiencer! THAT will be so much better!

Thanks to everyone who has kept this pregnancy in your prayers. So far, I have not had any serious issues and have been blessed to really not have much morning sickness or other issues. My energy gets better by the day! I haven't had any complications from my clotting disorder and our most recent sonogram showed a healthy and active little being. My next focus will be that 18-20 wk sonogam which will not only show the sex, but more importantly, look at that wee forming heart. I have faith that it will be completely normal, but seeing as that my nursing background is in heart defects, I have that in the back of my mind as always being a possibility! God is always in control and He has protected this wee one until now so I know He has the ultimate plan in mind.

Have a wonderful rest of your weekend and a phenomenal week!

Beginnings of my Virginia adventures

2011-02-18T19:52:00.002-06:00

Yesterday, I boarded a plane to go meet my beautiful namesake, Miss Aubrey Lynne. As in true Stephanie fashion, the plane trip was quite the adventure. I seriously have NEVER been to Washington DC where I don't have a completely entertaining plane ride. It all started in 2001 when Michael and I went to DC when I had a conference at the Holocaust museum. We actually started a book of all the crazy people we encountered! From the so called African prince at the airport to the really loud pharmacy people at CVS, these are all documented in a spiral notebook (which I think Michael still has). Anyways, this trip was no exception. I sat next to a man who was taking his family to DC for vacation. He drank out of a mystery flask the ENTIRE 2.5 hour flight and subsequently became louder and more boisterous as the flight went on. Towards the end of the flight, he started telling me all about the evils of the American government and how proud he was to be Indian because they gave the world Yoga. It was actually quite sane conversation for someone as trashed as he was! I actually saw him stumbling to the bathroom once in the terminal. Hilarious!

Kim and Aubrey picked me up (WAY past Kim's bedtime!) and we made the 2 hour drive to her house. We spent the day today wandering around shops and experiencing life with a wee infant. From the blowout at Costco to the screaming fit at Target, it was quite the day! It's made me a little more aware of what I am in for! I know Jason knows exactly, but it's one thing to take care of babies at the hospital and then leave them at the end of the day! It's very eye opening! Needless to say, I'm exhausted, but it's a good kind of tired. Aubrey is absolutely precious....smiling and talking (when she's not pooping and eating!).

So now I must shuffle off to bed. I made Kim give me my shot tonight, and she was not thrilled at the prospect, but she did fine. I don't do well giving the shot to myself, which is why I have designated my husband as the shot giver. He does so much better than I do!

It's only 8:10 Texas time. I am pathetic! Good night! :)

Russell family adventures

2011-02-13T08:18:00.002-06:00

First of all, let me say that I really need to get working on the "bring your camera" angle. We had such a fun day yesterday and I didn't take a single picture! Bad mom! :)

Jacob and Andrew are here this weekend and we've been having a wonderful time. I got home late on Friday night, but they'd already been adventuring with Jason. Liberty was in dachshund heaven with her two favorite little ones back in the house.

Saturday morning, we woke up for our traditional pancake and bacon breakfast. This is typically the first thing out of their mouths when we pick them up. "Um, do you think we can have pancakes for breakfast?" Hilarious. After breakfast and getting ready (and a rousing game of Just Dance 2!), we headed out to enjoy the absolutely BEAUTIFUL Texas weather. It was a gorgeous 65 degrees with sunny skies and no clouds. We went to the Fort Worth Nature Center and explored all the trails we could find. They even have a little building with a lot of Texas reptiles and fish on display. My favorite was the caged prairie dog. I think that was Liberty's favorite, too. She REALLY wanted in that cage. The park ranger actually came up to me and said "Um, ma'am? Your dog is angering the prairie dog. Can you please remove her?" Yikes. We hiked all over the trails and ended up all muddy, but exhausted. We headed out just as they were closing the gates because after all, "Those left in the park after closing will be locked in overnight". Not an adventure we wanted to partake in!

After the hiking, I of course had three ravenous males on my hands. We fed them and they wanted to go hang out at Jason's dad's house for awhile. I think they love it over there because there's always seeming to be some science experiement with fire. This one involved a windshield wiper fluid bottle, alcohol, and a propane torch. Use your imagination. We were there for several hours before pouring two very tired boys and a comatose Liberty into the car to head home. Once home, we unwound with an episode of Sponge Bob and I think the boys eyes were shut before I even turned out the lights for bed!

Today, I came to work for a few hours, managing to sneak out of the house while everyone was still sleeping. I'm hoping they are getting lots of good sleep after our weekend of adventuring while I am happily giving medicine and sticking people for IV's! Not sure what is planned for the rest of the day, but I do know that Andrew has to finish his Valentines for his class party tomorrow. It's a "sock hop" and he's "encouraged" to dress appropriately! He didn't like Jason and I's suggestion of slicking his hair back, but he might roll up his pants and wear some white socks with his dark dress shoes. Who knows. He's thoroughly convinced that none of his teachers are going to dress up. I told him that I can guarantee they will be dressed up...teachers ALWAYS love a day out of dress code!

I've got work at the beginning of the week, a sono appointment on Wednesday (YAY!), and fly out of here on Thursday for an extended weekend to meet my niece, Aubrey. Whew! I'm going to be busy! :)

Jason surprised me on Friday with a BEAUTIFUL flower delivery of a dozen red roses. I just love my husband so much! It seems weird that we've been married for five months already. It seems like much longer. I still can't believe that we're gonna have a baby in August, but I guess I have a little longer for that to sink in! :)

I continually seem to be amazed at the blessings God has provided to me and my little family. I can not seem to thank Him enough.

Preview of coming events

2011-02-10T12:43:00.002-06:00

I think I mentioned in my last post that I was certain 2011 was going to be even more interesting and full of adventure. Boy, was that an understatement!

We found on Christmas Eve that we're expecting a wee bundle of joy in August! August 30th, to be exact. For those of you who know those who are close to me, our sweet flower girl Hannah was born on August 30! Jason is convinced that this means the baby will be a girl, but we're just praying for healthy at this point.

The pregnancy has already been filled with excitement. On January 7, I got to see our sweet child. I fell in love with that little flickering heart beat! Because I'm full of medical fun, I am now on blood thinners, aspirin, and TONS of folic acid to counteract my sneaky genetics. God has His hand on this baby, and so far, it still seems unreal that I'm growing a person!

So now, my days are filled with exhaustion, lots of vitamins, and my husband becoming an expert shot giver. I'm so very thankful that God has brought our little sweetie this far.

Psalm 139:13-18
13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.

Our little one is growing by leaps and bounds. At the doctor today, we saw him/her waving arms and flailing sweet little legs! Praise God for the gift He has given us!

New and Different

2011-01-27T20:28:00.002-06:00

It has been a wild ride. Almost a year of non stop changes! New job, new marital status, new everything! I am so thankful for the blessings I have been given. I should remember to be more thankful for the hardships I've endured, but that is not always so easy.

And so the new starts again! I have a new job! A NURSING job! I'm working in a clinic giving IV infusions. I start IV's, draw blood, access ports, adn all kinds of fabulous nurse things that I have so desperately missed since July. Right now, it's a part time job, but I have the potential to pick up extra hours at two different clinics. I am hopeful that it is a very good thing for our little family.

Andrew celebrated his 9th birthday last week! My grandma was in town and took everyone to eat Mexican food. It's so fun to see these two precious boys interact with my family. My grandma just doted over them. Jacob and my brother are practically twins (except that my brother has NO musical talent). Andrew just thought it was cool that people brought him presents! I had made him a cake and was thoroughly excited to introduce him to....TRICK CANDLES! The child had NEVER had them before and the look on his face was absolutely priceless. They made such an impression that at his birthday party on Saturday, he had to ask his mom if the candles were regular candle or trick candles! Hilarious!

I am sitting here in shock because I just realized that Tuesday is FEBRUARY! Where did my month go? I think I'm perpetually stuck in a time wharp. Maybe it's because I've been so busy and exhausted that I just haven't had the time to stop and process. Who knows.

Two years ago today, I got my very first email from my sweet husband. I can't believe I am so blessed to have married this wonderful man. If you had asked me on New Year's Day 2009 what I'd be doing in two years, I don't think I could even have guessed that I would be a wife and an automatic mom to two precious boys. I am BLESSED! Haven't I said that already?

More blessings are on the way. I don't exactly know what they are, but I choose to believe that God has His hand on our family. I can only continue to praise him for the wonderful things He has given already and for what is to come.

A Year of New

2011-01-09T20:42:00.002-06:00

Happy New Year! Of course, it's 10 days late, but let's just be thankful I blogged in January! :) It's been a quiet year so far, but in true Stephanie fashion, it's destined to get more exciting from here!

I got a promotion at work last week. Well, it's more like being thrown into a position with a wee bit of responsibility. I don't mind. I'm used to a while lot more responsibility than I have now, so a tad more isn't going to kill me. :)

We're slowly looking for a new place to live. I think we're both tired of apartment life, especially since the people who moved in upstairs have brought a herd of raging elephants with them. They seriously have no respect for anyone. On Christmas Eve, Jason and I were trying desperately to wait for the boys to go to sleep so we oculd sneak all their presents to the tree. We couldn't do it because they were involved in some sort of home improvement project at 11:30 at night. It culminated in my going up there, knocking nicely on their door, only to have the woman come to the door and look at me with a stupid look on her face and say "Being a little loud for you?" No, dummy. It's 11:30 at night on CHRISTMAS EVE!!! Needless to say, sometimes, I close a cabinet door a tad louder. And I may even slam a door. But just maybe.

I decided to go back off Diet Dr Pepper, which has been an interesting adventure. I've cut the caffeine way back, mostly doing tea. I drink a bunch of unsweetened decaf tea. I've never really been one to sweeten tea, so moving off artificial sweetners really hasn't been an issue in the tea movement. I think I've done relatively well. :) Maybe I should ask Jason!

It's Jason and I's 4 month anniversary! :) The time has flown by, and even though 4 months doesn't seem like a long time...WOW. God has really taught us so many things about each other, and I can't wait to see what He has in store for us this year.

Christmas fun!

2010-12-27T08:36:00.002-06:00

Wow, I'm really not a good married woman blogger, am I? Guess I'll have to work on that!

Christmas was absolutely amazing. Jacob and Andrew were here from the Saturday before and went home yesterday. Our apartment has never seemed so empty. Liberty is sulking because her "little ones" are gone. We had so much fun with those sweet boys! We took amazing pictures in downtown Fort Worth in front of the giant Christmas tree. There was an insane amount of cookie baking. I think we watched all the fabulous Christmas cartoons and kid movies.

Christmas morning, we awoke to two very blessed little boys. My family poured their love and affection all over those kiddos. It was seriously Nerf-a-Palooza. After the Christmas present fun with just us, we got ready and went to dinner with Jason's mother and her side of the family. Liberty had to wear a Santa suit and by about 8PM, was so tired of not having her bed to sleep in, she hid under the Christmas tree and took a nap! Sunday, we relaxed, cleaned up the Christmas mayhem, and headed over to Jason's dad to say hi before they went back to their mom's house.

And as previously stated, Liberty is now moping around the house, watching the door longingly. She keeps sniffing the blankets and wondering why no one is giving her food under the table. It's a hard life for a dachshund.

I'm off today with big plans to watch all the Christmas movies that I knew Jacob and Andrew wouldn't want to watch! I think there will be de-decorating, but I'm trying to put that off as long as possible.

I have a very short work week, which is a blessing. Sometimes, you just need a break, you know?

I would ask your continued prayers for my little family. Jacob and Andrew did not want to go home, and it was so wonderful to have them for the week. We're looking to be up closer to them because they are needing us. A house in their neighborhood or close to it would be absolutely ideal! At this point, any decision we make has them completely 100% in the forefront!

Wow, still can't believe it's almost 2011! What a year this has been, and next year will no doubt be fabulous as well!

Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year from Jason, Stephanie, Jacob, Andrew, and Liberty Russell!

My thoughts.

2010-10-27T18:28:00.006-05:00

No, I'm not an employee of a transplant program anymore, but this does not mean I'm not still affected by what goes on. In my three years of employment in that position, plus the two on the heart floor, I came to call many transplant families part of my family. Or to be more specific, they made me part of theirs. I got to celebrate birthdays and anniversaries...of actual birth or the "heart birth".

Transplant is an ever changing science. A new and fabulous medicine is always in the works, but it never changes the fact that you are placing a foreign object in a body that doesn't want it. God created the human body perfectly. It rejects intruders. Even though that beautiful new heart is the gift of life, it is an intruder and the body wants nothing more than to get rid of it.

Transplant families are the strongest I know. They try to make a normal life for their loved one while they face the constant fear that something BAD may happen. They bond together as no one else can...as a clan who has seen their family member sicker than sick and made better by a gift from another person. Of course, this bond also leads them to experience the horror of transplant. The transplant gone wrong. Rejection. Infection. TCAD. Death. But in all of these horrible things and times, they still remain strong. Yes, they may crumble, but in the end, they hold fast because they believe in miracles.

I believe in miracles. I've seen them. I've also seen a "miracle" crumble before my eyes. That does not sway me from my belief that God is always in charge. ALWAYS. It's hard to see God in the crap that this life presents us with, but He's always there.

God will never give us more than we can handle. Ever. He says that, but do we believe it? I believe it. I've experienced it. The last year of my life has proven it.

I am so blessed to have people in my life who love me. I am also blessed to have people who have been through the worst and have seen the beauty that God has provided. Wow. That's a lot of blessings!

I can never thank God enough for the things He has brought to me. Who is that family? It's not just the biological one. It's the man He blessed me with. It's the family that God gave me. It's the transplant families who consider me part of theirs. It's the friends I have known forever who consider me the "aunt" of their kiddos. I am blessed.

That's it. The end.

Hello again! :)

2010-10-04T19:41:00.002-05:00

Yep. I'm a Mrs. It has hit me a few times in the last few weeks. It hit me when I was introduced as "This is my wife, Stephanie". It hit me when I got to check "married" on my tax info. It REALLY hit me when I got my new Social Security card with the name STEPHANIE LYNNE RUSSELL! Crazy!

Our wedding was such a beautiful day. I got to say everything I always wanted to the man of my dreams. I got to continue family traditions by kneeling in prayer on the bench that my sister, my mother, and my grandmother kneeled with their husbands on. I was blessed to share the night with my husband and our closest friends. In the end, I look back and know that God has a hand in my life. If I still worked at CMC, I wouldn't have been able to invite some of the patient families that have truly amazed and blessed me. I had all of the people who have seen me from infancy to adulthood all in one room. Jason and I were so thankful to have these people here to celebrate our union.

We had an AMAZING time in Maui. I did not want to come home. I didn't even miss my dog (who would be very upset if she knew this, so don't tell her!). I got to spend 7 days with my fabulous husband swimming, golfing, snorkeling, driving, flying, eating, and just having an amazing time! My aunt let us use her beach front condo and it was so awesome! We rented a convertible mustang and ran around the island feeling fabulous and knowing that we knew NO ONE! :) I am a total foodie (and so is Jason!) and we really had the best time exploring all the fresh seafood that Maui has to offer. Seriously, it was so amazing that I didn't want to come back to lunchmeat and boring food. '

I was so lucky to spend my BIRTHDAY in Maui with my new husband! The night before, he and I went out on the town and had so much fun experiencing all the little cute "dives" in Kihei (the area of Maui where we stayed!). We got fabulous service because we told them it was our honeymoon AND my birthday. What else could a girl ask for? My sweet husband surprised me with a very adorable stuffed dachshund (complete with Hawaiian lei!) and a card. I love that he did that. It absolutely takes the cake as my most favorite birthday.

So now. We're home. We're married. Settling in to married life! Jason is working a different route than normal, but it's seeming to pay off for us! I'm working full time right down the street and they seem to love me! They keep saying I'm above and beyond what they normally get. I don't think this is my forever job, but it's great for the interim while I'm working to get back into the hospital.

We had the boys over this weekend. We had an amazing time! There was golf. There was a cooking lesson. There was church. There was family bonding. Jason and I want SO much to live up by these two precious boys. Please pray for this. They need some stability and a family that says "You matter".

Jason is off making money for our little family. Liberty is mourning the lack of the boys and wishing they were around so they could spoil her ROTTEN. I am wishing our family was together, but praying that one day soon, it will happen. I would hope that you would pray for that too!

Almost!

2010-09-03T12:26:00.003-05:00

1 week. 7 days. 168 hours. 10,080 minutes.

I can't believe it is almost here! Jason and I were just talking about this yesterday. I mentioned to someone the other day that I was getting married "in September" and they said, "Um, Steph? It IS September!" It doesn't seem as though seven months have gone by since I saw my sweet fiance on one knee with a precious smile and heard that most beautiful of questions! SO much has changed since then! I am so blessed!

In a week's time, I'll have a new husband. This delights me to no end. I'm ready to be done with all the wedding planning and just have my husband to myself without the dreaded wedding bag, wedding website, or the 10 emails I have to respond to pertaining to wedding stuff.

Today, for the first time in 7 weeks, I'm working! It's not a hard job, but at least I'm able to bring in a little bit of money. Of course, it's also the first day in 4 months that it is sunny and mid-70's outside. I'm sitting behind a desk in front of some big windows that let me see the beautiful sunshine and soft breezes. But, I get to stay inside and answer the phone. And I am thankful.

The day after we get back from Maui (at FIVE AM. Ick.), I am starting a new job. It's not as a nurse or an educator, but a completely un-related field. It's completely a God thing. I was offered the job literally less than 5 minutes after walking out of the office building. Here are the reasons that make me know it's a God thing.
1. It's Monday through Friday, no weekends, little to no overtime.
2. It's TWO minutes away from my house which saves on gas!
3. They wanted me so much that they said I didn't even have to start training until after I get home from our honeymoon.
4. I have the opportunity to show off my organizational skills and experience working with physicians

Isn't that amazing? Right now, it's just a "long term temporary position", but it allows me to figure some things out while having gainful employment. The pay is enough to help with living expenses and allow for some breathing room. The team I'll be working with has two very personable team leaders. I'm not sure how long I'll be doing this job, but I'm very VERY happy about it while it lasts.

I'm so excited to start seeing all the family and friends come in for this fun weekend. I haven't been able to put my hands on my little sister for ELEVEN months and that is WAY too long in my opinion. I've got aunts flying/driving in, friends I haven't seen in months, and that's just my family! Jason's getting excited too! I'm looking forward to introducing Jacob and Andrew to the part of my family that hears me talk about them all the time but hasn't been able to meet them yet! I think they're pretty excited too...they keep asking and making sure they are going to get to meet certain family members.

I doubt I'll be posting again until after I'm a Mrs. You can always find me on Facebook to get the most up to date info and my current moods! Thanks for your prayers and I'll see you soon....as Mrs. Stephanie Russell! :)

And it gets closer...

2010-08-21T09:56:00.003-05:00

With less than three weeks until the wedding, my brain is often swimming with many MANY random details. Just when I think I've figured it all out, a new one comes sneaking in to try and stress me out. I refuse to let these take over. Why? Well, if you read my blog, you'll know that I'm desperately holding to the knowledge that September 10th is only the beginning of our story. It's one day in a long LONG adventure that we're planning to have. There's absolutely NO reason to sit and stress over it.

All the big things are done! Bridal pictures. Marriage license. Engagement pictures. Tux rentals. Food choices. 2 of 3 bridal showers. Ta DA! When I type it out like that, it does seem like a big accomplishment! Yay!

The things I'm most excited about are the vows Jason and I will make. The people I'll get to see. The vacation away from the continental US. I made Jason a golf tee time in Maui last week and the woman on the phone said "Thank you, Mrs Russell. We'll see you in a few weeks". Wow. It's crazy to think of myself as a Mrs!

The only big thing I did this week was sell my sweet car. I've been tossing the idea around for several months. Jason has two cars, and there was really no need for me to contribute a third. I happily paid mine off, cleaned her up, and made her all beautiful for a new owner. It was a hard decision, but in the end, it's the best choice.

Jacob and Andrew have been over here this week. We always have a hilarious time. The big hit this week has been "Just Dance" on the Wii. I've had that game for awhile, but have only brought it out in the last week. Jason even made a video and posted it on Facebook of Jacob beating me while dancing to the Spice girls (my pick, not his!). I can't even win a dancing game! They start school next week so we won't have extended weeks with them like in the summer. I may go through withdrawls...I really REALLY have a great time when they're over here.

I guess I should get my rear off this couch and have a productive Saturday. Jason and I are supposed to go on a road trip to get his other car, but that may be postponed. Right now, I'm perfectly content to sit here with my diet dr pepper, a warm and snuggling Liberty, and a book!

Wedding preparation fun!

2010-08-10T22:51:00.002-05:00

A month to go! Insanity!

Things are coming together for our grand day on September 10th. In the last two weeks, we've managed to take my bridal portraits, organize the ceremony/reception site and food, find a pastor, take our engagement pictures, finalize flowers and cakes, and start collecting RSVP's! Whew! No wonder I'm exhausted!

I'm still job hunting and wondering what God has next in store for me in my career. It's a really hard lesson to learn, but I'm trying to do it with patience and grace. It's starting to get to the point where I'm wondering how God is going to provide financially, but He will not let me down if I continue to trust. I may not like how it works out, but it will be the best in the long run.

This weekend, I have a bridal shower thrown by Jason's mom. I also am going to help Becca set up and decorate her classroom. It should be relaxing on the wedding front, now that all the big stuff is done! :)

"But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus" ~Philippians 4:19

An earnest request

2010-08-02T23:56:00.003-05:00

In the grand scheme of things, my problems are tiny. I have good health, a roof over my head, and people who love me. Most importantly, I am redeemed. I am more blessed than I will ever know.

At the moment, I don't have a job. I left Children's in April to find out what God wanted for me in my nursing career. I did home health for a few months, and now have moved on from that. I'm desperately trying to get a job in a hospital, but to no avail. I have lots of experience, but apparently am un-hireable at this time.

Five weeks before our wedding is not a convenient time to be out of work. What is God trying to teach me right now? Patience? How to remain faithful through times of trial? How to get by on nothing? I have no idea at this time, but I'm eager to find out what He has in store for me.

I would ask for your prayers in this situation. Not necessarily for me to find a job, but for God's plan to be worked out perfectly as it always is. For me to sit by and trust that He is never going to give me more than I can handle? Perhaps. I have no idea. All I can do is pray and seek out His plans for my life. And eat ramen noodles in the process! :)

Thank you in advance for lifting me up. I know He is going to be glorified in the answer to these prayers.

Today in the life

2010-07-27T23:08:00.002-05:00

Today has been an interesting day. I found out from a job that I thought I had an "in" that I don't. I took Liberty to the dog park and she acted like a fool. I watched Chopped with my aunt. It was all in all a good day. It had moments of disappointment, but I am so loved by my family and friends that I feel eternally blessed.

I haven't worked for two weeks because my patient is in the hospital and some other issues. I am praying daily for a position in a hospital where I can bless my patients with my skill and caring. I'd love if you prayed that too!

I'm getting married in six weeks. 45 days from today. It seems like it is all snowing in on me and I MUST remember that Jason and I will be pledging to each other in six weeks and then that makes it better! :)

Tomorrow, my mother is coming to town and we have such an agenda! We are meeting with the Tribute at 1 and then going to pick up my dress at 4! Thursday, I have no idea, but I am hoping that we can meet up with Jason, Jacob, and Andrew for dinner....and maybe buying school backpacks! Friday...the BIG day. Bridal portraits! I LOVE my sweet hair dresser CARINA (at Salon Pompeo at Mockingbird) and she will be doing my hair at 9AM and then we are headed to have pictures taken. I have no idea how fabulous I will be, but I hope that my pictures will be beautiful for my husband to see!

I would covet your prayers for the following week. I am still waiting on interviews from last week that will hopefully end in a job opportunity for me! I appreciate your prayers and good wishes for the coming week!

A new favorite!

2010-07-24T12:24:00.005-05:00

I found this song this morning whilst driving around DFW on my bridal fitting errands. It's amazing to me...

"We will rise and we will fall" God lets us go through these trials and moments of perfection.

"The glory is YOURS alone" God knows what is to happen in my life. I can only be blessed because He has chosen me.

Enjoy!

Aaron Shust - To God Alone (2009 Video & Lyrics)

And the days speed on by...

2010-07-21T21:53:00.003-05:00

Seven weeks and counting. Fifty one days. Is time really going by this quickly? It almost seems unreal! Things are starting to come together at lightening speed. Our invitations went out Monday. RSVP's are starting to come in. I've got my bridal portraits next week. Engagement pictures will be following soon. We have a meeting to finalize all the Tribute details next week. Tux fittings have started. Final payments are due in about a month. WOWSERS.

I'm desperately trying to not get bogged down in all the details because when it comes right down to it, the details are unimportant. What IS important are the vows that Jason and I will stand up and say in front of God, our families, and our friends. It is important to start our lives together with the proper foundation. Whether or not the flowers get there on time or centerpieces are perfect is all fluff!

Last week, our little family had quite the fun time! Andrew had a golf tournament (he got 6th place! YAY!). Jacob and I scared off squirrels and other wild life whilst careening around the course. Tuesday, we all went to Six Flags! I seriously haven't been there since Becca and I had season passes one summer. That summer, I went so many times that I got TOTALLY Six Flags'd OUT and haven't been back! We had a great time, even though it was 102 degrees in the shade! I think we probably all lost a few pounds with all the sweat! I got my roller coaster fix and was completely amazed how much easier it is to go to an amusement park at my size! I didn't get asked to get off ANY ride and no one came and attacked me with their little size brick thing (if you've been big and ridden on Titan, you know exactly what I'm talking about!).

This weekend, I was blessed to go to Houston and take part in my first bridal shower! The ladies of my parents church (most of whom have known me since I was about 2!) hosted a shower for me on Sunday afternoon! It was quite the experience to be at a shower for ME! I've been to SO many and hosted SO many and it was odd to have the shoe be on the other foot. Jason and I got many beautiful things and I'm excited to have them in wherever we end up! I've extended the lease here in Euless for 3 additional months so we don't have to move AND get married within a few weeks. It will put us with a lease expiring in the middle of November so if you know anyone in North Tarrant county with a nice and inexpensive house to rent, we'd love to take them up on that after November 11!

This week I think I'm going to start school supply shopping for Jacob and Andrew. Jason and I printed off their lists tonight and I got giddy with the thought of crayons and number 2 pencils. We did find it funny that the kids are now having to provide things for the teachers besides the typical construction paper and kleenex. Andrew's list asked him to bring post it notes! I KNOW they aren't using them in his classroom, but I'm certain his teacher is! Scandalous!

Thanks for all the prayers for my job situation. I'm still at an impass at what to do. I've been to several interviews and am praying long and hard that God will lead me to exactly what he wants me to do. It's a hard lesson to learn.

Please keep my new little family in your prayers as the wedding gets closer. Jason and I are doing pre-marital counseling and I know that is going to be SO good to do! We covet your prayers!

My new normal

2010-07-09T19:56:00.002-05:00

I love this new normal that I am engulfed in. It's a normal life when I'm sitting with Jacob and Andrew watching a marathon of Super Mario Brothers and Sponge Bob. Jason is working, but we're still hanging out. It's like a big sleep over. It's a new normal when Jacob says to me that he's "stoked" because my family loves to hear how he and Andrew are doing.

Jason and I are getting married two months from tomorrow. What an amazing thought! I'm ready to get rid of all the planning and just start the living as a wife and a mom! Having these two sweet boys with me this weekend makes me excited for that thought. It's a very real possibility that we may have one or both of these sweet kiddos living with us this fall. This thought really excites me!

I've got some work changes brewing in the near future, and I'd covet your prayers. I really want to get back into the hospital setting. I love my sweet home health patients, but I've always loved the hustle and bustle of the hospital.

Today, I had a conversation with Jacob and Andrew about quality of life. Jacob (14 yrs old!) asked me why I left CMC. I said it was because I didn't have quality of life. I asked him if he remembered me always on the phone and tied to the pager. He said "yeah, you always had to stop what you were doing and talk to the hospital people". I said that as much as I loved my patients, I loved my family more and that to me, quality of life was spending time with them and their dad uninterrupted. It was a very eye opening conversation for me and made me realize how my job changes have benefitted my family.

Well, I've got to get back to Sponge Bob. And an 8 year old who is hanging off the arm of the couch. Hilarious.

2010-07-02T09:50:00.004-05:00

Seriously people, where does the time go? I really think that I just blinked and it was June. Now it's July! How did that happen? I guess having a few non-stop weeks of action helped it fly by!

A few weeks ago, I had the privledge to be the maid of honor in Becca's wedding. It was a delightfully fun wedding weekend...and there may or may not be pictures of me jumping on a sleep number bed. I'm just saying. I had a great time being there to help her start her new life with her wonderful husband. After her wedding, Jason and I zipped to downtown Dallas to attend the wedding of another dear friend, Jami. It was a beautiful wedding, complete with many of my Children's friends!

Jacob and Andrew have been over here quite a bit this summer. We've had a wonderful time! Andrew has had golf tournaments, Jacob's had a birthday, and it's been amazing bonding with these two and learning to be a family. For Jacob's birthday, we drove down to the Galaxy Drive In Theater in Palmer for miniature golf and Toy Story 3 fun! Yep, Pixar has once again managed to make me cry through a cartoon, but I'm okay with that. At that point, Andrew turned to me in the back of the car (he and I were laying down on top of the folded down seats) to make sure I was okay as I sniffled quietly. Hilarious.

If it's July, then there's just about 2 months until Jason and I say I do! Wow! There's still some things that need to be worked on...engagement pictures, bridals...actually getting a chance to meet with the pastor...you know, minor details! Jason's schedule makes it difficult and we keep having appointments for this stuff and needing to change at the last minute! Ah well, it's the price we pay for having a 24 hr a day on call job! I know it will all get taken care of, so I'm not worried about it at the moment!

Work is going well. I got a promotion this week and was told I'm going to start training for the case manager position! Wow! I've been with this company for 2 months and already I am blessed! I am now going into the office for 2 days of the week and working with my sweet little patient for the other two. Once I'm fully trained, I'll get a raise and move from hourly rate back to salary. It's so encouraging to have trust and faith placed in me.

Well, I'm going to enjoy my day off today! Not sure what I'm going to do, but it doesn't really matter! :)

Change

2010-06-12T19:33:00.002-05:00

I've seen a very welcome change this week. Last week, I sat wondering if I was ever going to use my nursing skills again. I felt like a failure because I wasn't doing what I know I am capable of. It was hard for me to go to work, and I'm not happy to admit that there were tears before several of my work days because of this concern. At the end of the week, I heard from my office that my patient no longer qualified for services. I felt sad for the family, but excited at the thought of a possible new direction for me. It was concerning that I might be out of work until a new family presented themselves, but I was willing to take that chance.

And then I met the sweetest and most needy family. They are absolutely precious. This sweet little boy requires all of my nursing skills, including those I haven't used for years. Trachs, tubes, diapers, you name it...he has it. The mother has the most amazing faith and she and I get along famously. She hugged me on Thursday and told me through her tears that she was blessed to have found such an angel. I certainly don't feel like an angel, but I am so glad to know that my skills are blessing another family. It makes me feel worthwhile! I'm working three days a week and my days go by quickly because I'm so busy!

I've had the most busy week! Between my new patient and having the boys over so much last week, I've been running crazy! Jacob and Andrew came over on Saturday and left on Thursday night. It was SO FUN to have a house full! We played games, went swimming, and generally just got to know more about each other as a family! Andrew is doing a golf tournament tour this summer and he had his first tournament on Tuesday. He didn't play very well, but he hadn't done the tournament thing in 2 years, so it was a nerve wracking experience for him! And a learning one as well! I did learn that boys will EAT me out of house and home! I thought I had plenty of food, but ended up making an emergency food trip on Wednesday! How on earth do people drink that much milk? ICK! :)

In less than three months, I will be married to the love of my life, ready to go on our Maui honeymoon. I can NOT wait for this! The planning, organizing, and worrying are not my favorite part of this process! I'm ready for the finished product! This week, I received a notice from my apartment complex that it's time to renew my lease...which reminds me that I have NO idea where we'll be living in three months! AAAHH!!! :)

That's all that's gone on the last few weeks. My best friend is getting married next weekend, and I'm certain that will be fraught with a whole host of FUN! She and I have been friends for 14 years and I am HONORED to spend her last night of singleness with her. It's gonna be an insane week! Working Tues, Wed, Thurs...then wedding fun on Friday and Saturday! I think the boys will be back on Sunday because Jacob's birthday celebration will be happening, as well as another tournament for Andrew! I love my life!

2010-06-01T21:19:00.002-05:00

It's been a long few weeks. I've been so grateful to have a job that pays me well for what I do, but it's really REALLY hard to work when I don't even feel that I'm doing nursing work! I've been a home health nurse before, but at least in that job, I KNEW that sweet boy had medical issues and I got to deal with them on a personal level. Now, I just babysit and deal with years of non-discipline. Last Thursday, my patient broke down into a fit of rage and in my nursing need to protect him, I got my hand kicked violently into the TV cabinet. I didn't have any idea how much it hurt until I got home that night and noticed that not only could I not move the finger, but it was swollen about three times its normal size! Those grooves you have in your knuckles? Gone. It was beautiful black and blue and let me spend Friday night in the urgent care center!

I need major prayers to stay in the job I'm in. I know that God has a plan for me and my career, but it's just SO hard to imagine that God would want me in a place where I'm not using any of my nursing skills. I've interviewed at several places and am waiting for them to make their decisions. It's SO hard to wait, but if this is what God wants for me right now, I will sit patiently and try to listen to what He wants for me.

Jason and I are fabulous! He and I got to spend some great time this past weekend together. We went to fabulous Colonial golf tournament on Sunday and weathered the blazing May heat together! We ended up leaving before it ended because of the endless "rain delay" in which we never saw ANY rain. Monday, Jason and my dad played golf while Mom and I ordered invitations and prepared food for our memorial day fun. After dad and Jason came back, we all went over to Michael and Jennifer's for a cook out! It was SO fun!

I've got some big stuff going on this week and COVET your prayers. Not to be greedy, but this would be a really big thing I've been dealing with that will hopefully be all figured out by the end of this week. I can't really say more than that, but I know my faithful readers will pray regardless of having more information or not!

Another big thing that's happening this week is Oliver is going to live with Becca full time. He's SUCH a sweet baby, but he doesn't really do well with kiddos. Jason's kids will be over here a lot this summer and it's just safer for them to not be around him, especially if either Jason or I aren't around. It is going to be really hard for me to not having him around, but in the long run, Jason's kids and their well being are more important. Becca and I would love to find him a place where he could live in the country and chase squirrels to his heart's content. Right now, he'll stay with Becca and her yard. Not quite sure what his ultimate location will be, but right now, that's the plan.

Anyways, that's the fun going on right now. These next few weeks are going to be so busy, but fun! I've got Becca's bachelorette party and wedding, Andrew's golf tournament, and lots of other random funness! I'm excited for the mayhem! :)

Blessings

2010-05-15T09:48:00.003-05:00

It's been an extremely dreary morning. Over the last few days, the weather has been typical for Texas, but a true change from what it has been. We've regained the humidity and propensity for random thunderstorms! Arg! It hasn't rained any yet this morning, but it's in the forecast. Judging from the look of those clouds, it's a definite possibility.

What a week it has been! I started out last Saturday on a plane to Las Vegas! It was a blessing to have prepaid for that trip long ago because I didn't realize how much I needed to get away. Jason and I went with a group of friends and had an amazing time! Saturday night, we got to see Ka, one of the most popular Cirque de Soleil shows. It was insane! If you have ever seen one of these shows, you know that there's really no way to explain it. There's a lot going on, almost constant scenery changes, and mixed in there is a slight confusion as to what is actually the plot. All you know is that it looks AMAZING! Sunday, Jason and I broke off from the group and went to the famous "In and Out Burger", which is supposed to be like the west coast Whattaburger (I still think Whattaburger is better!). We also went to the Hoover Dam! What an amazing experience! The state is currently building this ginormous bridge just to the south of the dam and the feats of engineering in that space is phenomenal! We took a TON of pictured, were blown away by the wind, and had a great time just being together and enjoying the bright and sunny day. That evening, we went with the group and wandered around some of the casinos. I think we ended up walking through Harrah's, the Flamingo, Caesar's Palace, Bellagio, and finally ended up at Planet Hollywood for awhile. After the hungry bug started to bite, we wandered around looking for cheap steak and eggs! I think we found one of the shiftiest casinos, Bill's Gambling emporium (or something equally classy) and ate ribeye, hashbrowns, eggs, and toast at 2AM! Monday, Jason and his friend went to go play golf at a fabulous and award winning course while the girls and I went to the outlet malls. That night, we all got dressed up for an amazing dining experience at Carne Vino, the restaurant owned by Mario Batali from Food Network. The food was INSANELY good! Jason and I split a larger than life ribeye and the group had a great time being all dressed up and classy. We headed home Tuesday with plans to make a greater effort to get away and vacation!

Thursday, I started work! Finally! I'm a nurse for a little 9 year old boy who has a host of medical problems, but is still active, talking, walking, and socializing! It's the easiest nursing job I've ever had! We play Wii, fix snacks, watch an insane amount of Scooby Doo, and I put him to bed and monitor for a few hours before I head home. The family has grown children and ended up adopting three special needs children later on in life. They've never reached out for help, but it's so evident they need it. They are angels! Last night, I went to church with them and watched the little boy and allowed mom to worship without being concerned for what her child was getting into. It helps because this family is SO appreciative and it makes it a joy to care for them. While school is in session, I'll be working 3-11 on Monday through Friday. No weekends unless I want more hours! Hooray!

Before I knew the job would pan out, I did about 10 more applications at local hospitals. I ended up getting three interviews next week! I have 2 with adult heart programs and one with a pediatric heart program. There's no guarantee that I will be offered any of these jobs, and I may not take any of them, but it is flattering to have the interviews. I'm still trying to piece together if home health is going to be the right fit for me at this time in my life. I figure, if I am supposed to do something else, the opportunity will be supremely hard to pass up!

So now, my new normal consists of a relaxing steady job, wedding planning for that amazing September day, and loving on my fiance, step children, and puppy dogs. After school lets out, my work schedule will change again and allow me to spend more time this summer with Jacob and Andrew. Hooray!

That's the low down right now! I hope God is blessing you right now as much as He is blessing me!

The way it is!

2010-05-04T19:59:00.005-05:00

It's been almost six weeks since I worked, and it's such a strange feeling. I loved my job at Children's, but now I see how much it affected my health! I have been able to sleep without difficulty since my job ended. It's amazing how something like sleep can change a person! Being on call doesn't allow you to sleep well. It's like the calm before the storm, but one never EVER knows when the storm will hit!

I do miss my patients terribly. Being a part of someone's life that intimately is something that is not easily severed, but I am learning to move on. I know these precious babies are cared for, and that is the most important thing. My sweet K, S, D, B, T, C, and so many more will always have a special place in my heart. I am a better person for knowing them and their sweet families.

My new job hasn't started yet...and it's almost driving me nuts! It was supposed to start this week, but my patient's dad was hospitalized, so it's been postponed. I guess it's for the better. I'm going on VACATION this week, so it's probably better that I have some additional time off. It's going to drive me nuts next week if I am not doing something....

Oh yes, my VACATION? I am SO very excited! Jason and I are going with a big group of friends to LAS VEGAS! We've actually had this trip planned since last year and it's finally going to happen! We leave on Saturday and return on Tuesday. We're going to do all kinds of fabulous things....like Cirque de Soleil shows, visiting the Hoover Dam, golf, and just being with fun friends! It seems like I've been on vacation for the last month and a half, but I am certain it will be nice to be out of the state and away from all the drama here!

So, that would be the status of affairs here in Euless. Liberty is busy being a food snatching evil doxie. Oliver is with Becca. I am busy planning my vacation and wedding showers for Becca....and all kinds of other mischief! Including planning my own wedding! :)

Thank you so much to those who have me in your prayers. I still need it on a daily basis. I am a workaholic who is having to learn to not be crazy stressed and busy. I know God is in control and I am SO thankful for that.

A new start

2010-04-18T21:46:00.002-05:00

After lots of prayer and talking to those I really trust, I made a really difficult decision last Monday. I resigned my job at Children's and determined myself to take a different path in life.

It's been an interesting journey so far. I've had so many recruiters calling that it seems overwhelming! I've gotten lots of patient and co-worker emails and messages stating how much I'll be missed...that really feels good.

I absolutely loved my job at CMC, but in the end, it was the right decision to leave. God has been putting little bugs in my ear for the last 6 months, but I have been trying not to listen to them because I refused to accept the idea that I may not have all the answers. Well, I'm learning that lesson!

I am so thankful for my blog readers who I know will lift me up in prayer when I ask. It seems like I've been doing it a lot lately, but I know that those prayers have helped. Prayers are still needed. I have no job right now, but several good leads. I have a fiance who loves me and is going to work even more so he can help me if it takes longer than a few weeks for me to find a job. I have a family who supports me and knows this was the best decision. I have amazing friends who are willing to either talk about it or distract me.

So, here's to the next adventure! It seems rather weird to sit at home all day and talk to recruiters and do phone interviews, but this is my reality right now. That and play with Oliver and Liberty! :)

Soap box

2010-04-06T10:06:00.005-05:00

I typically don't like to rock the boat too much on my blog. I prefer to leave any statements of conflict or strong opinions to an actual conversation, not my written words. I find this works better for me...there's less of a chance for someone to walk away from a controversial conversation with me with the wrong idea than there is with a blog. It's like texting, there's no way to convey tone in a text. It's not a conversation, it's merely our society's way to limit our personal conversations and have a means to say difficult things without having to actually sit in front of a person and do it. Now, I'm not going to sit here and say I don't text. That's not at ALL what I'm saying. I'm a texting queen. When I look back at my cell phone bill every month, I'm always a little sad at the amount of "non-conversation" I have versus actual phone calls.

I've been taking some time off work lately to deal with some personal stuff going on. It's given me some time (sometimes I think too much time!) to look at some situations in my life that I've been too quiet about. I've had several things happen in the last few months that have really led me to take stock of my life and realize who my true friends are. These people are not shocked or dismayed when things go differently than planned. They don't lecture or judge. They just love. They call and offer support even if they don't agree with choices I've made. They don't ignore the misjudgement on my part, but they realize that everyone makes mistakes and don't label me as some sort of "broken" creature.

Christians are not perfect. Those who believe they are have some sort of piety that I am certain God doesn't welcome. What does God welcome? Those who choose to love the broken, hate the sin and not the sinner, and embrace those who realize their own shortcomings and are making valiant attempts to be more Christ-like.

The friends and family who really know me, know that the circumstances I have found myself in are not the norm. They are not who I am. It is those friends and family who realize this fact that I want to surround myself with. Not the judgers, the prideful, or those who would base how they respond to me on the circumstances, not by what they know of me and my character.

People can change for the good and for the bad. Striving to be more Christ-like is my goal. I hope that is evident. If it isn't, I welcome constructive criticism, but judgement isn't needed or wanted.

John 16:33
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

How fabulous is that promise? It's so certain! It doesn't say, if you have trouble. It says WHEN. God knows we are going to struggle and has given us this most precious promise! When all the crap goes down, our God has conquered it all already and we just need to cling to Him and His promises.

That's my opinion for the week. If you're interested in talking more, most of you know where to find me. If this post spoke to you, than praise God because HE wrote it, not me.

Spring-tastic picture fest!

2010-03-30T15:19:00.012-05:00

Spring has sprung! It's been so beautiful this week already! I'm loving the change from 30's to 80's! Yay for spring! Of course, we still opened the spring season with 6 inches of snow, but hey, at least it was gone quickly!

The very next day, it was absolutely beautiful and the puppies and I felt we needed outside time!

Having beautiful weather means Jason gets to have fun on the grill. While I didn't get a picture of the actual steak he made, I did take pictures of someone enjoying the leftovers.

Isn't she pathetic?

Today, it's been another lovely day. I've been spending time on the porch making wedding crafts! I've been batting around the idea of those flower pomador thingys, but wasn't sure if I would be successful at making them. I also made a flower girl basket for a sweet friend. It may seem weird to have a basket when there's not a flower girl present, but it was important for me. I'm going to put it on the "In Memory Of" table with her picture, along with pictures of all Jason and I's important family members who couldn't be there either.

And here's Liberty, who was sulking because I wouldn't let her continue to eat my cilantro plant. She was refusing to look at me when I called her name...

Hope the beginning of your spring has been wonderful! Can you believe in two days it will be APRIL? Yikes! :)

Tagged!

2010-03-21T19:15:00.004-05:00

Thanks to Maddie, I've been tagged! Well, this post will most likely be the most embarrassing and yet freeing post I've ever written!

Most of you know I've been a big girl for the greatest portion of my life. I've tried diet after diet to no avail. In January of 2008, I made the decision to pursue gastric bypass as a way to help me achieve my goals of healthy living. I'd endured YEARS of ridicule, diets that didn't work, and a stifled self esteem. It was time.

THIS was my before picture. My mom took it the night before my surgery.

If you've seen me lately, you know that I am 140ish pounds lighter than this. But I am still the same person. Just the outer body has changed...but not the heart inside.

Yes, I found the love of my life in this new body. BUT, I still have flaws. You can't lose this much weight without extra skin and folds. I am still ME, regardless of whatever extra stuff is there.

I absolutely celebrate those friends who have been there with me through the whole journey. Those who loved me as a big girl and now love me as a littlish girl. I can NOT fault my fiance because he didn't know me as a big girl. But he has seen me in that light...I don't hide ANY facebook pictures from him. He knows what I have been.

I am so blessed. Thanks to Maddie for having me take a minute to reexamine this part of my life. A part that is so essential to my being, but almost 2 years foreign to me. A weird thought, to be sure.

It's FRIDAY!

2010-03-19T20:36:00.005-05:00

I don't have any reason to be overjoyed that it's Friday. Except that I am! My week has really been pretty smooth! I've been on my own this week, but it's been relatively slow. We've done a lot of evaluation of new heart kids, but all in all, things haven't been crazy.

Even though it's been slower at work, I've actually had a lot to do in the evenings. My mom came to town on Friday for a fun weekend of wedding planning and mischief. We actually got SO much accomplished! Saturday morning, we got up and ran some errands. On the way home, we stopped at Market Street. They were having a Bridal show thing and had some displays of what they offered for cakes, flowers, and catering. They also had some door prizes. We sampled, entered the contests, and ended up putting our deposits down on the cake and flowers, which we had already decided to get from there. We went home to relax. Later that afternoon, mom got a phone call telling her she had won the grand prize! She ended up winning $200 off the cake, $200 off the flowers, and $200 off catering! OH MY GOSH! What a fabulous blessing! That allows us to have big chunks paid off for those two things we already placed deposits on and a possibility for catering for the rehearsal dinner! YAY GOD!

Later on in the week, I got another phone call saying I had won the two free cooking classes! Yes, that's right, between the two of us, we won ALL the prizes at that Market Street!

Tuesday night, I ended up going to a dinner meeting for the transplant camp I always attend. It's fun to hang out with the teenagers all weekend, even if they do keep me up WAY past my bedtime!

Wednesday, I met Michael at his law firm in uptown and we headed down to see one of our favorite Irish bands, the Kildares. I "found" an unused St Patty's Day necklace and hat to make up for my obvious lack of green. We had a great time listening to them rock out!

Thursday was Jason's birthday! I made him a cake (with all my mad cooking skills!) and we happily ate mexican food!

Oh, I love him so.

Anyways, I've got some time off coming my way, so I've got a lot of errand running planned. YAY! Or nay. Depends on if you love errands. It depends on what mood I'm in! :)

Hope your weekend is smooth sailing!

2010-03-06T10:34:00.002-06:00

"March is a month of considerable frustration - it is so near spring and yet across a great deal of the country the weather is still so violent and changeable that outdoor activity in our yards seems light years away." --- Thalassa Cruso

Isn't that the truth? I seriously can NOT figure out the weather this year! It goes from hot to cold at a moment's notice! Today, it's cool and cloudy. Yesterday, it was warm and sunny! There's just no telling what this weather is going to do! It's hard because my mood really seems to be affected by the outdoors this year! Strange!

My agenda was to clean the house this weekend. I woke up on Sunday morning to 2 inches of water in the entire apartment. Dog bowls were floating across the kitchen floor and there was water shooting out from underneath the kitchen sinks. Turns out, there was some sort of leak. The pipe was fixed soon enough but I've spent the rest of the week dealing with the after effects. I actually didn't get my carpet fixed until Thursday, so walking around on wet soggy carpet was just FABULOUS! I think the smell is finally gone as well. They are supposed to come back and clean the carpets on Monday, we'll see if that actually happens.

Right now, I'm hanging out with Liberty while watching Twilight for the 99th time. I've got laundry in the dryer, but we all know how much I despise folding. I'm certain it will sit on the far corner of my bed for awhile before I actually do something with it.

Wedding plans are going swimmingly. Last weekend, my mom came into town to start some of the big decisions. I ended up finding "THE DRESS" and making some other big decisions. We picked out cake and flowers as well. I was able to show my mom the place we picked out to get married, she loved it! Sunday, Jason and I were scheduled to bowl in a fund raiser for Camp Soar, the teenage transplant camp. Even though I thought the day would be ruined by the minor apartment flood, we were still able to go. Jason brought his kiddos and they had a chance to meet my mother, which she absolutely loved. I know she's excited about instant grandchildren! :) We all bowled together before the tournament began, and mom ended up leaving right before it started to drive back to Houston. I was glad she had an opportunity to meet Jacob and Andrew.

This week is a busy one at work. We're pretty much seeing anyone we can see before my two main transplant doctors go on vacation. I think the other coordinator will be gone too, so it will be me, the new nurse practitioner, and the fellow holding down the fort! We'll be fabulous!

Well, Liberty and I are going to head back to our afternoon of snuggling and Edward Cullen drooling. :) Jason's at work today, so he's having to miss out on this beautiful experience!

Enjoy your day! I know we will!

Whew!

2010-02-14T14:24:00.002-06:00

I've been engaged for 2 weeks now, and the overwhelmed feeling hasn't gone away. I'm beginning to think it's gonna stay around until the wedding! It has been an awesome experience so far...getting to call Jason my fiance makes me pretty darn happy! I still feel so blessed to be starting this journey with him.

So, the countdown to September 10 has begun. By tomorrow, the contract will be signed for the ceremony/reception location. The registries have been started. The wedding website is being created. I've got 2 really good dress contenders. I think I have a color scheme. We have the people who will be standing up with us. There's a lot more details that need to be worked out, but I'm trying to keep it in perspective.

Liberty and I are spending a warm and toasty Valentines Day together. Jason got called into work, so we are snuggling on the couch. The remnants of the record shattering snow storm are quietly melting. I have tomorrow off, but have to go in for about an hour to do some teaching with one of my families. I have chili in the crock pot and the Olympics on the TV! The only thing that could make it better would be Jason's presence, but him being able to work steady is a GREAT thing!

Ok. Guess I should get back to my busy afternoon of Olympics and chili! :) Have a fabulously wonderful Valentine's day! :)

I said YES!

2010-02-02T22:31:00.004-06:00

Yep, you heard it right! I am getting MARRIED IN SEPTEMBER! I am marrying the most amazing and loving man imaginable. I do not deserve all the goodness God has brought to me.

Details to follow. Thanks be to God for all HE has provided for me!

Adventures in motherhood.

2010-01-17T14:15:00.003-06:00

I have been so blessed this year! I have a stable job, an affordable residence, and a family that loves me. My ultimate blessing this year has been meeting Jason and cultivating our relationship more and more every day. We'll be together for a year on January 26, and it's odd to think of my life before him.

Not only have I been blessed with the gift of Jason, but I've been blessed to be a part of the lives of his two kiddos, J and A. Since both Jason and I know that God has put us together to be with each other forever, it's weird thinking of myself as a future stepmother. I'm definitely not the kind of Cinderella step mother that I'd imagined in the past. I think I'm pretty cool for the most part. I've always loved kids and know that I'm probably going to have 2 or 3 of my own, but to be blessed with two from the get go is fabulous!

I'm not sure if I was supposed to mesh so easily with Jason's kids, but it's been a blast getting to know them. J is 13 and completely reminds me of my brother Michael. He's super smart, not that athletic, pretty quiet, and would spend every moment he could playing his DS or the Wii. He loves music and plays a mean guitar. He is the dark haired miniature of his father and has so many of his mannerisms it's scary! A is 7 (soon to be 8 in two days!) and ALL boy. He loves golf and pretty much anything that involves him running around like a tasmanian devil! He's also smart, but has a completely sassy side that reminds me of how I was as a child.

This weekend, Jason and I wanted to celebrate A's 8th birthday. We had cake, went to a REALLY cool driving range, and generally played a lot of Wii Fit. It's so funny to see the two of them react to me. I made them sandwiches for lunch and didn't stop getting thanked for about 2 hours after the meal! I baked and decorated a cake for the birthday boy, and you would have thought I'd made the most gourmet cake ever, even though it is pretty much the most basic cake imaginable! It's so fun to get to know these boys and know that it's going to be a relationship for years to come. I only pray that I am a good influence for these guys and grow to be someone they can really trust.

My new year

2009-12-30T19:21:00.003-06:00

My new year's resolutions....

Dear God, let me love others more than I love myself.

Let me always be thankful in other's joy before I am thankful in my own.

Let me remember that God has truly blessed me WAY more than I deserve.

Let me decide to live with JOY instead of with FRUSTRATION.

Let me remember to be the optimist instead of the pessimist.

Let me be thankful that HE has blessed me with the love of my life and not be worried about the little things.

Above all else, let me focus my life on what HE wants me to do, not what I want or think should happen. Let me be GOD centered, not ME centered. And let me be thankful when I am reminded of this, not offended because things don't happen the way I THINK they should. God is in control, not me.

My newest uplift.

2009-12-08T10:11:00.003-06:00

At Your Feet by Casting Crowns

Here at Your feet, I lay my past down
My wanderings, all my mistakes down
And I am free

Here at Your feet, I lay this day down
Not in my strength, but in Yours I’ve found
All I need, You’re all I need

Jesus, Jesus, at Your feet
Oh, to dwell and never leave
Jesus, Jesus, at Your feet
There is nowhere else for me
There is nowhere else for me

Here at Your feet, I lay my future down
All of my dreams, I give to You now
And I find peace, I find peace
Here at Your feet, I lay my life down
For You my King, You’re all I want now
And my soul sings…

‘Cause I am free (here at Your feet)
All I need (is at Your feet)
I find peace
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet

And I am free (here at Your feet)
All I need (is at Your feet)
I find peace
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet
We’re at Your feet

Here at Your feet
I lay my life down

If you haven't had the opportunity to listen to Casting Crowns before, I'd highly recommend them. They ALWAYS have a song that seems to speak to me RIGHT where I am at that moment. They don't pansy around with the lyrics of their songs either. Truth is spoken LOUDLY! This song is the latest comfort to me. I've attached the Youtube version so you can experience this with me!

Enjoy!

Learning to accept change

2009-11-22T09:16:00.002-06:00

As a little girl growing up in church, one of my favorite things was to spend the afternoon at a friend's house after Sunday morning services. We had to be back at church that night, so it was always fun to be a part of another family for awhile.

If you know anything about me in my personal life, I'm a wonderful ATTEMPTED planner, but it typically doesn't work out the way I've decided it should. These events were no exception. My friends and I would come up with this brilliant idea for lunch fun during Sunday school and then I was left to ask permission from my mother. For some reason, we always went to the other family first. Eight times out of ten, my mother would look at me and say "Now, Stephanie, you know I hate surprises." OOH! That would infuriate my free planning spirit! It didn't MATTER that I had all week to decide to do these little luncheons and call my friends ahead of time. It only mattered that I had come up with this GREAT idea, and someone wasn't letting me express it RIGHT then.

As an adult, I find myself more and more moving towards that "not liking surprises" mentality. I seem to get all flustered when things don't go according to plan, even though it was really just MY plan and not GOD'S plan for me. Do I not remember that patience is a virtue? Do I not trust that someone else has my highest benefit at heart? The One who created me always knows what's best for me....and I need to remember this more often.

I really don't have any one situation that I'm referring to. I'm just coming to realize that I need to relinquish the control that I have on my life. If I did, it would make it more easy to understand why things happen or to even just accept that there's a higher goal out there.

Things here in Euless are pretty stable right now, which is a nice and welcome change! Work is semi-peaceful. I had a wonderful opportunity to go to Orlando for a conference last week, and it was so nice to get away from work for a few days! Jason is wonderful...I'm going to spend Thanksgiving with his family this year, a first for me! I can't wait! Liberty and Oliver are spending their time beating each other up in love and sleeping. I am thankful for the stability that God has provided me with lately!

What's in the plan for the next few weeks? "They that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." --Isaiah 40:31

I think that's self explanatory! :)

Broken

2009-10-28T21:31:00.003-05:00

Huh. Has it really been three weeks since I last posted? This seems ridiculous.

I've had a lot go on in that short time period. Most importantly, I've lost one of the small lights in my life. My sweet Hannah Olivia has gone to be with Jesus, and I am SO happy that she doesn't hurt anymore. No more pokes or IV's or echos or pretty much anything painful. She went to see HIM quickly and didn't suffer, which was an absolute blessing. I had the blessed opportunity to be with her mom and provide support, even though I had absolutely no idea how to handle that situation.

Today, I went to her life celebration and cried all the way through it. Hannah was an absolutely precious angel. Her family is so strong. On Saturday (her going HOME day!), her mother turned to me and said "Stephanie, I'm so sorry that she couldn't be your flower girl!" Imagine that. In her time of complete pain, she's thinking of me. What an amazing woman.

In nursing school, they warn us about becoming too attached to our patients. They school us all about how involved we should be with families. This idea has been thrown out the window when it comes to my patient population. I am with them TOO much to not have an emotional connection. I am the one who told Hannah's mom "We have a heart for Hannah" and "Her new heart is beating". I've been with them through the worst and the best. And I was there at the end...to hold that sweet baby and weep with every corner of my being.

My transplant team has been through the wringer this weekend. We lost three patients...some before transplant and some after. No one really can know how this feels except those involved, but I am so thankful to my friends and family who have just been there for me. It's more than I could ever handle alone.

Please pray for Hannah's family. Pray for Amanda, Jason, and little Cooper. They need to feel HIS arms around them. Pray for everyone who has been touched by Hannah Olivia's life. We are HURTING. This precious angel left such an impression on anyone she came in contact with.

Isn't she beautiful?

Another day...

2009-10-05T19:37:00.002-05:00

No, I have not fallen off the face of the earth. I'm very much alive and well, sitting peacefully in Euless. I have two precious puppies who are completely sacked out in their beds after chasing each other around the house for an hour. I have a boyfriend who loves me and is working in Hearne (YAY for work!). I have a job where I can get told by parents "She wanted Miss Stephanie to kiss her stubbed toe!". I've got a good life right now!

I had an AMAZING time in Montreal! Becca and I roamed so much around the streets of that beautiful city! Of course, my trip didn't start off so well! I ended up oversleeping and missing my flight! I am RETARDED! It worked out well though, I ended up on the same flight as Becca, so we were able to figure out how to get to our hotel together instead of suffering alone! I did miss the wine and cheese reception, but no harm done! The conference was okay, but not what I expected. At one point, I snuck Becca into a luncheon, and we proceeded to be seated with the entire board of directors for the conference! Hilarious! There were SO many beautiful things to see in that city! We walked everywhere and felt totally safe at all times of the day! I fulfilled my fantasy of going to a Rachael Ray recommended restaurant AND bagel shop....and got to spend a lot of quality time with one of my best friends while doing it! Yep...when fulfilling Rachael Ray fantasies is my most exciting time, I know there's sadness abounding. Anyways, it was a great trip. My only regret was that since I packed in a RUSH, I had the most terrible shoes to traipse around Montreal in! Needless to say, these shoes have since seen the dumpster.

Since I got home, I've been completely run down with the dreaded swine flu. Every day in clinic, we diagnose another kiddo...and they are SO pitiful! Today's case was a sweet little 2 year old with the most PATHETIC face! I swabbed her nose and she didn't even CRY she felt so bad!

The puppies are absolutely INSANE right now. Oliver is currently stalking his sister. She's hiding in the crate and he keeps walking up to it and howling. He's parked in front of it, just waiting for her to come out so he can attack her. I've now fed them, so they will hopefully calm down! One never knows!

We're now watching The Dark Knight in surround sound. It's going to be a great night! This movie is CREEPY!

Anyways....guess I should sign off now. Not really anything going on right now. Except for the completely passed out puppies! What's going on in your world?

Another Sunday night!

2009-09-20T20:11:00.004-05:00

Liberty and I are having a righteous ol' time, here in Euless. We've been experiencing the wonders of the dog park on a daily basis. Today, Liberty got her head bitten by a ferocious bull dog who apparently had it in for Lib. She got over it with only a small amount of blood drawn. She has a tiny cut on her head, but I consider it her admission to the dog park of Euless. She'll deal.

Otherwise, I am up to no good as usual. I leave for a no doubt scandalous trip to Montreal on Wednesday! I am attending the International Transplant Nurse Society meeting in Montreal, Canada! Becca is going with me, as a secret and completely non member attender! She will party in the city during the day and then we will party together in the night time hours. Has anyone been to Montreal? Are there places, beyond what Racheal Ray might say, that I need to frequent?

Jason has been working this weekend. I am SO THANKFUL that he has been able to hold this subsitutute board that gives him more money, but I don't like it that much. Ah well, I will deal. The railroad has been exeptionally stingy in who they will allow to work, so I am thankful in whatever aspect my boyfriend is allowed to work! YAY Railroad! But only for today. I may very well change my mind later.

Ok. I am needed at the television for the Primetime Emmy watching. Yes, judge me as you will, but I love awards shows!!!! It allows me to examine all the fashions and realize how completely out of touch I am with reality.

So from the middle of the Emmy celebrations, I bid you goodnight!

A new normal.

2009-09-17T22:34:00.002-05:00

Liberty and I are getting used to a new normal. Life in Euless is quite peaceful and good. I LOVE riding the train to work. It's ultimately fabulous that I get the opportunity to read a book whilst on the commute to work! I only get the chance to ride the train while I'm off call, but it is STILL much better than driving in traffic all the time!

Not much to say today. Been working hard, but not doing a lot of transplants. This is surprising considering we have about 15 listed for transplant. Crazy!

Guess I should go to bed. I am on call at 7AM tomorrow. For only three days. What sense does THAT make? See you later!

A Sleepless in Seattle classic!

2009-09-07T05:25:00.003-05:00

When the sun is high in the afternoon sky
You can always find something to do
But from dusk till dawn as the clock ticks on
Something happens to you

In the wee small hours of the morning
While the whole wide world is fast asleep
You lie awake and think about the boy
And never ever think of counting sheep

When your lonely heart has learned its lesson
You'd be his if only he'd call
In the wee small hours of the morning
That's the time you miss him most of all

This is such a beautiful song! Of course, it's completely not applicable to my current relationship. It DOES, in fact, go with my sleeping pattern as of late! I've been awake for a long time already, and it's only 5:42AM! I end up either not being able to go to sleep, or most of the time it ends up that I can't STAY asleep. I think I'm averaging about 3-4 hours a night. Over a month's time, that tends to lead to CRAZY Stephanie. I've tried lots of different things with varying results. A quiet, calm, and cool environment didn't seem to make a difference. Benadryl makes me groggy, but I still wake up early. Ambien makes me clean out the fridge and straighten the apartment while sleeping...I completely don't remember it and I still only get about 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep. It's starting to get really old, especially when I'm on call. I had chalked it up to moving stress, but seeing as I've been moved for 2 weeks now, that doesn't seem to be the answer. Apparently, I am just not destined for good sleep for awhile.

I am excited that I've got some fun things in the works! My birthday is a week from tomorrow and I'm hosting a happy hour at this yummy restaurant called Sambuca. I won it at the Dallas bridal show and thought I'd share the wealth! I also get to go to Montreal for a work conference on the 23rd! I am WAY excited about that! I got to go to Vancouver last September, now onto the other side of the country this year! Maybe I'm supposed to make this a pattern?

Well, I've got a few hours before I have to be bright and shiny. Maybe I could try and sleep? HA!

Life as it is...

2009-09-06T00:27:00.002-05:00

WOW! Hooray for life in Euless! It's an absolute fabulous experience, right here in Euless, Texas. I am actually loving my life in the suburbs. It's quiet, calm, and comepletely predictable! BUT THAT IS OK!!!

I am getting used to the suburbs. I have MISSED this! My apartment is slowly coming together...it really depends on the moment with my decorating skills!! :)

Other than the moving, things are going well. Jason is working more than I would like, but I get over it. Liberty, Oliver, and I continue to hang out. Oliver got his blood drawn last week to make sure his levels of phenobarbitol were correct. All levels were good and he continues to be seizure free. Go Ollie!

Jason and I went to Costco today....in Southlake. What an experience! It is hilarious to watch pretty people! Sitting in the food court, watching the fancy people scarf down pizza for 2 dollars a slice.....is AWESOME!!!

And now I am asleep. Perhaps I should sleep!!!

Hello from Euless!

2009-08-28T22:48:00.002-05:00

Well, I am all moved in and somewhat settled! Liberty and Oliver are coping well, which is WAY different than before! I only have about 4 boxes left to unpack, but I'm putting them off for as long as possible!

It's SO different being in a suburb...rather than an urban area! I forgot how much I love it! There's restaurants close by! Walmart is 10 min away! Target is even closer!! What a delight! :) I really have missed being in the suburb frame of mind.

Today, I finally got GOOD cable (which is something I have been without for 6 months, at least!). I am settling in to my new "normal". A life where I ride the train to work when I am not on call. A norm where my puppies don't have a mile to walk to get to the bathroom. A life in the suburbs. It feels really GOOD!

Everything with my move went very well. The movers were on time and nothing has been damaged. They were quick and did an amazing job! My parents were here to help unpack the CRAZINESS of my apartment! I got to spend time with Jen, Michael, my parents, and Jason at a fabulous dinner. All in all, a good moving weekend...if one could even call moving good!

Liberty, Oliverl and I are learning this new way of life. I am loving being closer to Jason. I actually am loving being closer to all the action...halfway between Fort Worth and Dallas! It's quite the adventure.

For now, I am learning to adjust. Learning that what I have planned is not always what God has planned. And patience...which is the most difficult lesson of all! I am NOT a patient person! :)

So, from a well settled apartment in Euless, I will sign off. Good night!

The lull...

2009-08-16T18:58:00.003-05:00

It's absolutely the lull before the storm. I am moving this weekend...which no doubt will have absolute chaos ensue. My parents are coming from Houston to help...which is absolutely appreciated! I have every single thing in my house except a week's worth of clothes and my computer packed. No kitchen anything! I have lots of little things from Central Market so I can have some sort of nourishment! I have plans for dinner with friends on Tuesday and plans for dinner with a drug company on Thursday. Friday? I get my Dart ID (so I can ride the TRE to work!), take Liberty to Connie's for doggy day care, sign my lease, move into my apartment, have my direct tv installed, have my time warner cable installed, and maybe even breathe? Saturday? My parents have volunteered to clean my old apartment, Jason is going to do some sort of "Kirby sudsing" of the carpet, and I will hopefully be unpacked. Sunday? My parents will have to go home (Sad!) and I will be left to start my new experience in Euless! Not busy at all!

Meanwhile, Jason is out of town all week working. I am eating food from my microwave. And Liberty is absolutely freaking out every time I even leave the room! That's pretty typical for her, so I'm not too concerned about that! Here are the good parts: Jason should be home by the weekend to help me move! I have netflix movies online to watch! I get to experience food from Central Market and that's ALWAYS delightful. I will see my parents this weekend which is always a good thing. I am experiencing a minimalist perspective...living with very few possessions is a new and enlightening experience.

As far as work goes? My sweet Hannah continues to be a miracle. She gets better every day and has finally gone through a weekend without a disasterous experience. It's a good thing, because my poor heart couldn't undergo much more. She is an absolute precious girl and I just melt every time I see her! If any of you are on Facebook, her page is PRAY FOR HANNAH. Her mama is an absolutely precious woman who has had more to deal with than I could ever imagine. Go support her!

Okay, Liberty and I are going back to watching our Netflix movies! Hooray for instant movies, right? Have a wonderful week! I'll hopefully be broadcasting from Euless next time!

Lifting her up

2009-08-08T20:00:00.004-05:00

Many of my posts lately have revolved around sweet and adorable Hannah Olivia. She is absolutely one of my most favorite patients of all time. She also has become, although not of her own volition, one of the most stressful patients I have ever had. She is SO sick. Every week, she struggles to improve her condition...and every weekend, she seems to plummet down into all kinds of badness. I don't really understand this enigma, but it still happens...each and every weekend.

I wish that I could fix things with just a word...but I can't. I can only continue to tell people about her and lift her up in prayer. Jesus is the ONLY one who can fix her now...people here on earth are only pawns by which God can work His ultimate plan for sweet Hannah's life.

Please spend a bit of your prayer time tonight for my sweet almost 5 year old Hannah. She needs a miracle...and so do her parents. Bless them with your prayers....she's absolutely worth it. I'll put up a picture of her from May...the annual transplant picnic!

Isn't she beautiful?

Yep! That's my flower girl! :)

A mystery.

2009-07-26T21:13:00.002-05:00

God works in mysterious ways. I know this. Yet it never ceases to surprise me when He does.

Take Saturday. I am minding my own business, just hanging out. I get a text page that says "Please call 68352. Hannah coding". What a wake up call! My sweet Hannah, who was supposed to go home on Friday is now coding in the ICU! Not good. She was bleeding internally and had emergency surgery on Saturday night. Thanks to all my FB friends who prayed for her!!

Today? She has doctors who are shocked that she made it through the night. She is fighting the sedation that is supposed to keep her comfortable. She is squeezing hands when directed. She is Hannah.

This precious baby is a miracle. There's no other way to describe it. Go to FB and subscribe to the group "Pray for Hannah" and you'll see. God has a special plan for her. We don't know what it is at this point, only that she is supposed to keep on going right now.

Her family could use your prayers. They are an absolutely precious family who know when to freak out and when to be thankful. I wish more of my families were like this.

So right now, all I ask is for you to pray for this precious little girl. She is completely in God's hands. Pray HARD!

Quiet is a good thing! Seriously!

2009-07-20T19:52:00.002-05:00

It's a quiet night here at the Emerson household. Oliver and Liberty are happily chewing rawhides in their respective puppy beds. I'm playing on Facebook and watching The Bachelorette "The guys tell all". It's a completely edifying night here! :) I am serious, these guys are worse than women! They are cat-fighting with the best of them! Hilarious!

I want to thank every one of you who prayed for my sweet angel, Hannah. She's doing so well, transferring out of the ICU in the morning! What a complete answer to prayer! I told her mom on the first night she was admitted to the ICU that she needed to pull through so she could be my flower girl in the spring! Amanda assured me that she just knew that God was going to protect her life, and I'm pretty convinced that HE HAS! YAY GOD! :)

I am moving one month from tomorrow. Yikes. I have my bedroom mostly packed, except for my clothes. The closet is done, thanks to Jason. I need to move on to the bathroom and kitchen. I'm excited to get away from this ridiculous rent and the exceptionally loud upstairs neighbors that love nothing more than to bang around the floor. WOW. You can not even imagine how loud these people are! I wish I could start attacking the ceiling with a broom handle so they could know how loud they really are. ANYWAYS. I'm moving. I'm hoping that I will get motivated in the next few weeks.

Not much else is going on around here. Work is crazy, but then again, when is it not? I am busy and never EVER stop moving....but that's just the new norm. Hopefully some changes are in the works, but one just never knows.

I hope that your week is absolutely phenomenal! I surely hope mine is!

Life in the fast lane

2009-07-16T19:50:00.003-05:00

WOW. It's been an amazing two weeks! I actually had the opportunity to be off call for 2 full weeks at a time, and it's been a welcome relief! Of course, I've still been busy, with my at least 4 patients in the hospital at a time schedule, but it's all good.

As a quick update, my precious Hannah is doing SO MUCH BETTER! I can only attribute this to the thousands of prayers that have been lifted up in her behalf. There's no other explanation. From two weeks ago, where I sat with her mother and cried and wondered if she was going to make it through the night, until now...when she is talking and communicating and has basically normal heart function. PRAISE THE LORD! It's a giant relief and a complete answer to prayer. God still works miracles and this is an AMAZING one.

Other than that, I've been with Jason a lot...just being together and having a great time! We're hanging out with his family...and my family...and his kids...and my Liberty...etc... Don't worry, you'll be notified of any important developments! :)

I am moving in a month! Crazy! My bedroom closet is packed, mostly thanks to Jason and his love of packing. I still have to pack the bathroom and kitchen, and then I'll be done. Needless to say, I have no pictures or figurines...or anything in my house. It's pretty bare!

Ok. It's time for my latest addiction...So You Think You Can Dance! Must go watch! Night! :)

A week past....

2009-07-09T21:21:00.002-05:00

It's been a week since I have posted last. My sweet transplant from my last post has gone HOME (go DIVA go!)and I could not be more proud of her! I have had a new transplant kiddo in the interim, and he is doing well. I do have one precious transplant baby who is NOT doing well, and I am asking all prayers for my sweet Hannah. I know that her parents would welcome any help and prayers directed towards her. She is very sick and neeeding my blog friends to come together and pray HARD for her healing.

I've experience a sort of set back this week. I thought I would be headed toward nurse practitioner school in the fall, but there are no funds and no supporters, so I wait. And see if this is what GOD has designed for me. Keep praying.

Other than that, I have no new developments. My main purpose? To PRAY FOR HANNAH. This little girl needs more prayer than I have ever asked for. She is a precious little girl who deserves no less than the best. PRAY for her!!!!

Exhausted

2009-06-28T22:56:00.002-05:00

I am TIRED. Having my weekend ZAPPED by a transplant is always a double edged joy...happy for the patient who gets a new heart, but sad for me because I am up for countless hours and no sleep.

This week, I am totally prepared to be alone all week again. It's all good, I have the stamina to handle it, I just don't appreciate it!

I would ask your PRAYERS for my precious doctor friend who is dealing with all this crap alone at the moment. We have some really sick kiddos....and I do not enjoy having a stressed out doctor! She is too much of a fabulous resource for people to mess with!!!

This week, I really NEED to start packing. That's a goal. It may or may NOT happen. I loathe packing.

That's all that's going on at the moment. Night!

The craziness continues!

2009-06-26T21:35:00.002-05:00

Never let it be said that my time alone at work was boring! This week, we've managed to evaluate two kids, admit more kids than I would like, and been attacked by WAY more paperwork than is humanly necessary. It's all good. I understand that everyone needs their time off....but it really is draining on the psyche!

In other excitement, poor Liberty had surgery this week. It was supposed to be a routine dental cleaning, but ended up where she had to have a tooth extracted. This brought on two days (and still going!) of sneezing blood and a generally crabby Liberty Grace. She is better today than she was yesterday, but still having some issues that I'm not entirely happy with the vet about. She's a tad pitiful, but having Oliver around to bug her doesn't give her much recoup time. Poor thing has to be crated with him all day...no telling what THAT is like!

Jason and I had our five month anniversary today! Of course, he's off working, but I am happy he is! He's had a really hard month and the railroad has cut back on the amount of trains it is sending out. Thankfully, it is picking up and he's back to work on a consistant basis. I do miss him being around, but I am glad things are starting to turn around at work!

I am moving in less than 2 months and I haven't packed a single box yet! This is exceptionally unusual for me! I guess I need to get moving, right?

One year ago yesterday, I was admitted for my eleven day stay at Baylor University Medical Center. It was the most horrific thing I've ever experienced, comprised of a TON of puking, scans, lab tests, and culminating in my gall bladder removal. It doesn't seem like it's been a year...but July 5 will be my one year from GB removal...and that seems BIZARRE! Thank goodness for my amazing surgeon (LOVE you, Dr Kuhn!) who tirelessly fought to figure out what was wrong with me!

Okay, I'm currently being sucked in to the TV series "The Tudors" (thanks Michael and Jen!). I'll update again soon...

Same story, ninth verse!

2009-06-11T12:23:00.003-05:00

I bet you will NEVER ever guess what the title of this blog is about...oh yes, my friends...I'm moving AGAIN! Unfortunately my brilliant plan to save money by living right by the hospital isn't working out so well. So, I'll be moving in August...my ninth move since I moved to Dallas in 1999. Wow. Has it really been that long? Huh. Interesting.

Anyways, I'm actually moving out of my comfort zone and happy Dallas bubble. In looking at rent and freeways and traffic, I decided it probably wasn't a good plan for me to move back up to North Dallas. The tollway sucks money out of me and I don't want to go that route again. My next thought was over by my brother and sister in law's house...but then that puts me farther away from Jason in Fort Worth. Not a great option! So, I reached out of my protective Dallas bubble and feverishly searched the mid-cities area (Hurst/Euless/Bedford). I found a great affordable apartment in Euless and turned in my application yesterday! This time, I got smart and did it through a company which will pay for my move. DeLIGHTful! Those of you who know me at all understand that a moving company is a luxury I have always insisted on paying for. I'd rather eat ramen for a month than have to move myself! :)

So, effective August 21st, I'll be a Tarrant county resident. It should be interesting. My aunt lives in Euless and works in Dallas so she's got all kinds of lovely short cuts to save me from the drama of the freeways. It will be nice to be so close to her, although I'm sad to be farther from Michael and Jennifer. I just need to figure out how to get Jen over her fear of freeways so she can come and play with me more often! :) I mean, I'll live 10 minutes from Grapevine Mills! How fabulous is THAT?

This week has been the complete opposite work week than last! I have only had two or three kids in clinic, which is shocking for me. I'm used to having seven or eight every time! It's a nice break. One of my transplant docs is going on vacation today for 3 weeks, then the other coordinator goes for 2 weeks...so it's nice to get a calm week before the mayhem! :)

Guess I should probably get back to work. Have a fabulous day!

My amazing life.

2009-05-27T21:38:00.008-05:00

God has blessed me with the ultimate amazing life. I have a job in which I get to tell people "HEY, we HAVE a new life for your child!". I also have a personal life where I have a man who wants nothing more than to make me happy. I am extremely blessed.

Life is a whirlwind at this point. My job is completely crazy...doing NINE transplants in FIVE months is a bit ridiculous. But I am coping. The fact that I have been on call for less of the transplants is FABULOUS! Of course, more than half of the kids are "mine", but that is ok. I can deal with the after effects of these transplants. I am just SO lucky that my babies are getting new starts at life.

In my personal life, I am so completely in LOVE. Well, not IN love, but I love a most fabulous man. He is not what I ever would have expected to fall for, but only GOD knows what is best for me. And I have found HIM. The one. But that's just between you and me. Although I know that "you" is multiple people....including my parents! So that's my statement of faith...that I have found the man I am supposed to be with. I must be completely crazy.

So, what else is going on? Not much. I am moving from my beautiful commute of 2 minutes to 25+ minutes of commute to be closer to someone I love. I am apartment searching in the mid-cities area (predominately the HEB area) because I feel I need to make a change in price for my apartment. I guess that's what we do for LOVE! :)

Work is WORK. It's nothing fabulous, but I do get to spend fabulous hours with children that change lives. I am extremely blessed. I realize this. And for this, I am thankful.

So, to the God who is INFINITELY able to do more than I ask or could even possibly imagine, I am thankful. For more than life itself.

Did I really do that?

2009-04-23T10:13:00.002-05:00

When I was rolled back to the operating room on April 21, 2008, I knew that my life was going to drastically change. In my pre operative meetings with my surgeon, he presented both surgical options. After my extensive research, I was already leaning towards the gastric bypass to give myself some physical consequences for poor eating choices. He told me that patients typically lose up to 75% of their excess body weight. He thought that with my determined spirit and desire to succeed, I would do even better than that.

The year hasn't been a walk in the park as far as my body is concerned. Two additional hospitalizations, one gall bladder gone, two endoscopies...none of these things were planned. 6 weeks of throwing up 5 times a day wasn't planned. Five months of trying to get recovered from all that fiasco wasn't in my thought processes when I was rolled into that operating room.

My life has drastically changed. If someone had asked me 9 months ago if I would do this surgery again, I would have no doubt laughed in their face and said not in a MILLION years! If you asked me now? I would wholeheartedly say absolutely YES without a minute of hesitation. Why? Because even through all the crap, I feel amazing. I'm told I look amazing. I go up flights of stairs without getting tired. My asthma hasn't been near the issues this winter. I can go into a store, pull a medium off the shelf and not try it on because I know it will fit. I don't have to use the "big girl" excuse of "Well, sizes just run small in this store". It's pretty amazing.

SO. Seven incisions=lots of pain! Three hospital visits=no fun. Weeks and weeks of throwing up=absolutely time to forget that. Losing 143lbs=PRICELESS! Hooray!

Early morning rising.

2009-04-19T05:43:00.005-05:00

I am absolutely not a morning person, by any sort of stretch of anyone's imagination. I am not typically nasty, but I don't bound out of bed with a great big smile on my face and a raging excitement to start the day. You can imagine how excited it would make me to get up at 4:30AM, get ready for the day, trek off to work, only to find out 20 minutes after I get here that the transplant supposed to start at 6AM is now starting at 7:30AM. ARG! The oh-so-inept procurement coordinator (the person who takes care of the donor) told me happily "Now you can just go back to bed for a little bit!" No. Not really. I'm not going home (even though home is very close!) to re-anger the dogs, settle them down, get back into my bed for what will be a fitful sleep and no doubt make me even more crabby than I already have the potential to be.

So here I sit in my office, Dasani in hand, jamming happily to my iPod, which is currently playing Phil Collins. Ah yes, it's a thrilling life I lead! I am sad because today I was supposed to be going to the Main Street Arts Festival in downtown Fort Worth with Jennifer, and now I'm not going to be able to go. Seeing as I have had all of about 30 minutes of sleep in the last 24 hours, I don't think I'll be that fun. I don't even know at what point I'll get out of here or be coherant enough for conversation, let alone driving to Fort Worth. So I get to miss that. But a sweet baby girl gets a new heart...so I guess things could be a lot worse.

This week is going to be CRAZY! I am only working Monday through Thursday and then off Friday for VACATION! I'll probably leave early a few days to make up for this epic adventure I've been on in the last 18 hours. I first found out about this transplant at 11AM yesterday, but we didn't get the official call until almost 8PM. Needless to say, it's been stalking me!

Friday will be spent in the normal pre vacation mode...wildly packing and re-packing, the much needed pedicure (complete with neon vacation colors...I'm thinking hot pink!), and general pacing about until I can finally leave for the airport. The flight doesn't leave until 8PM, so there's lots of nervous pacing until I am safely on that plane and headed for vacation wonderland. Our fabulous hotel (it's at the airport, it almost HAS to be "fabulous"!) has a shuttle who will pick us up at any hour at the airport and take us back for a few hours of sleep. I'll no doubt spring out of bed nice and early on Saturday, completely excited to start our cruising fun. It's nice being a returning cruiser because now I have a basic knowledge of what's smart to do. For example, it's really REALLY smart to pack pajamas and a swimsuit in your carry on. Your luggage may not get there until 10PM, even after the boat has already sailed, and you may really REALLY want to put on pajamas and crawl into bed to start the fun times of free room service! We also got smart this time and booked the later dinner time slot...which will hopefully ensure that we won't miss every sail away from the islands or more importantly, the sunsets!

As far as what's been going on in my neck of the woods, it pretty much can be broken down into a few things. I've been working hard, but not harder than I have to. I'm doing my absolute best and am still striving to be the best coordinator I can be. I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do when my lease is up in August. Yep, probably move...how'd you guess? :) I'm loving spending every moment I can with Jason, figuring out where we're going in our relationship and introducing him to as much of my nutty family as is possible. I'm still reeling in shock that my surgery was a year ago on Tuesday. See? Not much going on here!

I won't post again until after vacation, unless I decide to do a homage to Betty on Tuesday, which still could happen but will absolutely depend on how crazy the days get here. I'll leave you with a lovely reminder of where I'll be spending next week...Bon Voyage!

Drama

2009-04-09T21:32:00.006-05:00

As much as I would like to say my life is full of drama, I am constantly reminded that so many other people have it far worse than I.

I don't have a child in a PICU who has uncontrollable SVT. Meet Stellan.

I don't have a child who even in utero, is destined to fail, but by God's grace, is continuing to live. Meet April.

I don't have a child without an acceptable diagnosis who continues to have bizarre symptoms that don't seem to have a cause. Meet Keegan.

I don't have a child who continually tries to reject her transplanted organ and who consistantly tries to make her world a better place. Meet Ashley.

I sit here in awe of families who are consistantly broken over and over by the "drama" that overwhelmes, but does not break them. I sit and stress about a co-worker who angers me.

Sometimes, my life is so trivial in the grand scheme of things.

Yet, I have a job where I get to announce NEW LIFE to families. "We have a heart for your child" and "Your child's new heart is beating" are the two most favorite things I ever get to say.

But in my normal life, I have no stress even comparable to these people. I sit and wonder why I stress about what someone says or does when someone else is at their literal breaking point.

I need some perspective.

Thank goodness for a Savior who loves ALL of us. We are all important in HIS eyes.

I am humbled that HE thinks of me just as much as a family in true crisis. Everyone is equal in His eyes. And for that, I am thankful.

Prayers are needed.

2009-04-01T08:42:00.000-05:00

Now THIS is spring!

2009-03-20T16:32:00.002-05:00

The last few days have been absolutely BEAUTIFUL! I can't get over how sunny and warm (but not HOT!) it has been around here! I love it! It's been sitting mid 70's with no clouds and just a very light breeze. The back door has been open most of the time I've been home and the puppies have been soaking up every second of outside time.

I've been battling some sort of disgusting spring infection. It started out as strep throat (I didn't even know adults could still get that!) and gradually turned into some horrifying bronchitis. I'm on my second round of antibiotics, but I'm feeling so much better by the day. I need to keep my sleep caught up and then I'll really feel better! I'm still coughing and hacking, but I'm on the road to recovery. I'm guessing that simple penicillin antibiotics just aren't gonna cut it anymore...I'll have to move straight up to the good ones!

I need to get better quickly because I got drafted to be a camp nurse at transplant camp next weekend! It goes from Friday evening to Sunday afternoon. My friend (and transplant doctor!) Lisa and I were drafted and I'm excited about it! I've been to the camp facility before during heart camp, but have never had the opportunity to stay there. It should be an interesting experience....30 teenagers and the outdoors! Hopefully there will be no large insects, reptiles, or rodents lurking about.

My cruise leaves five weeks from tomorrow! HOORAY! I am so SO excited! It's getting really close to time to buy plane tickets and shore excursions. I think that's when it really seems to feel real! I'm still attempting to find cruise/summer clothes. I think that's probably the most frustrating thing of all! I got some great sundresses last weekend at Old Navy. They were a nice surprise!

I keep squirting Liberty and Oliver with water when they fall asleep. Both of them were absolute beasts while I was trying to sleep last night! Oliver kept jumping in and out of bed. Liberty kept barking. Neither of these things equals good sleep! I figure, if they sleep this afternoon, they may not want to sleep tonight. This will NOT be acceptable. Needless to say, they are not happy with me the moment. Hey, people need SLEEP! They can get over it! :)

Me and my crockpot are having all kinds of adventures together. Tonight, I have created some sort of pork tenderloin wonderland. I mixed in barbeque sauce (no sugar added! Hooray!), onion soup mix, and some water and threw in a piece of pork. It's been cooking happily for quite some time. I bought my crock pot to transport queso for a superbowl party and we've been inseparable ever since! I'm turning domestic! Scared yet? :) I've also developed an addiction to doing laundry! Perhaps I've been overtaken by some sort of alien being! I guess you can't watch as much Food Network as I do without it rubbing off at some point.

I am on call this weekend, but hopefully I won't be getting as many phone calls as I did last weekend! Only one more week on and then two weeks off! Hooray!

Yep, I'm a slacker!

2009-03-06T18:07:00.002-06:00

Good heavens, this blog has been neglected! I just realized that I'm completely obsessed with checking other blogs, but it has somehow escaped me that people might want to know what's going on in MY life. Perhaps I'm wrong. I still see people coming to my blog, but maybe they are just using my blog as a jumping off point for visiting others!

Where do I even begin? I guess I can start with work. It's been BUSY! We've been transplanting like CRAZY and we've been seeing a TON of kids! That's good in one respect, but doesn't help my sanity level! I've had some really bad patient experiences the last month or so, so I'm working very hard on seeing the good in my job. I know God has me there for a reason, and it's taking every ounce of me some weeks to determine what that is. Perhaps it's just to teach me to be better in control of my emotions as they relate to patients? Who even knows. I get very involved in the care of these sweet babies, so it really affects me when bad things happen. I've been thinking a lot lately about justice and its place in my job. I've got sweet angels who are dancing with Jesus that took their meds every day of their lives....and bratty teenagers who refuse to take their meds and keep on ticking. Why DO bad things happen to good people? I'm working through this very question and am open to any/all suggestions on books to read or thoughts on the subject.

As far as non work stuff goes, there's a lot going on there too! I'm planning to go on a cruise in April, which I think I've mentioned before. I think there's 49 days to go now! I NEED this vacation and I can't even imagine how fabulous it's going to be! The differences since my last cruise will be most evident in the quantity of food I can consume, but that's okay. I can at least order the pretty food and just bask in its beauty! I went to a drug representative dinner last night and they kept begging me to order dessert! I kept saying, um, no thank you! Finally, I just gave in and ordered the "Death by Chocolate" cake, then promptly handed it off to one of the other people I was there with. It felt weird to be ordering sugar! At least on the cruise, I can order cheese or fruit for dessert and hopefully will not be judged by those around me! If so, who cares! :) I'll get lots of exercise roaming around Caribbean islands and snorkeling to my heart's content! I almost wish I could go back to the island where I almost died from all the hiking just to see how much better I could do!

My weight loss still continues to shock the snot out of me. A day doesn't go by when someone says "Are you done YET?". To answer all these questions, NO. I am not done. I will be done when I say I'm done. And that time hasnt' come yet. I think I've finally settled on a goal weight, but I still need to meet with my dietitian to see if that's a reasonable goal and how I stay there once I'm there. I really don't have that much farther to go. My next goal is to become more active. I've sworn off the elevator at my apartment complex, and I am starting to swear off it at work too. I need to actually get onto the elliptical machine at the gym...that is my next goal, I think. My endurance is SO much better since my jelly legs have basically gone away!

I've also got a new relationship that's making me pretty darn happy. I've endured a lot of garbage over the last couple of years, either the other person wasn't ready...or I wasn't ready...not meant to be the right person at the right time. I'm beginning to think I'm finally at that ready stage, both emotionally and spiritually. It's a nice place to be in. Just when I had all but given up, an amazing guy found me! We're having a great time and I'm just trying to understand it all. It's nice to be in a relationship that I don't have those typical girl panics in....will he call? Did I just make a fool of myself? What does he really think? We'll see where this is going, but right now, I'm exceptionally content.

Okay, I've been typing this for a really REALLY long time now. I hope your weekend is warm and happy...I know mine will be!

Another Honduras blog

2009-02-15T22:41:00.004-06:00

PLEASE keep my friends in your prayers! Here's a blog from another friend who is down in Honduras helping save the lives of children with heart defects!

http://shakethetreeoflife.blogspot.com/

Healing Hearts in Honduras

2009-02-13T22:46:00.002-06:00

Many of you know I had the fabulous opportunity to go to Honduras last year on a cardiac surgery mission trip. I didn't have the chance to go this year, but they leave tomorrow morning, bright and early. Please keep them in your prayers...I have many wonderful friends on this trip!

You can follow their progress at http://trenasue.blogspot.com