Beautiful

Our child is beautiful. Today, I cried on the ultrasound table as I saw our child's 4 chambered heart, with defined tricuspid and mitral valves and symmetrical ventricles. It was an amazing sight. We saw a perfectly formed stomach, brain, spine, and bladder. Two perfect kidneys. 8 ounces of miracle. I get choked up just typing about this beautiful child.

In true Emerson/Russell fashion, this miracle wanted to be mysterious for a while longer. In addition to all those beautiful parts, we saw two very tightly crossed legs and nothing else! The sono tech tried her hardest to get little one to behave, but there was none of that! We started the sono with our child upside down with his/her legs curled over the head and then acrobatics began! Never have I seen such dancing! A family friend used to call me "popcorn" as a child because I never stopped moving and I believe our child is carrying on this trait.

The mystery of gender will continue to be unknown for at least 2 more weeks. I have a regular doctor's appointment on the 14th and the sono tech said we could pop in for a "gender check". God is certainly teaching me patience!

For now, I will do my best to continue to grow this little one as best I can. All the pregnancy books say that the baby will double in size in the next three weeks, so I'd better make sure I'm giving him or her the best nutrition I possibly can...with the occasional peanut m&m thrown in!

I called Andrew and Jacob today to tell them that their brother or sister was so fiesty, and Andrew was so disappointed! We talked for a minute or two about other things and then he said "And so, let me guess....baby....GIRL???" The disappointment in his voice was so sweet! I know both of them are excited.

I don't have to go back to work until the weekend, and then I have three MORE days off before I go back on Thursday! What a nice relaxing week! Jason and I are doing to have dinner at my aunt's house, along with my cousin tomorrow night. SO fun! Other than that, it's going to be pretty low key around here for the next week.

Thank you for all your prayers for today's sonogram. I know that God has brought this little one this far and will continue to form his/her body to that completely beautiful one that we will meet in 4 and a half months! YIPPEE!

Miracle

It's funny how a simple sound can be miraculous. It's not a loud sound or an overwhelming one, but very powerful just the same. It is the sweet, trong sound of my child's heart, beating happily inside of me. Now, I'm already discovering this child's stubborn streak! He or she did NOT wish to cooperate for the doctor and tried to hide from detection, but we were triumphant and were able to hear this little one after a good deal of searching.

I was blessed when I met and married Jason to become an instant mom to two sweet boys. These guys have been a joy to get to know. They make me smile every time I see them, and laugh until my sides hurt. They have so much of their daddy in them and I see bright flashes of this all the time. The talent that exudes from those two is phenomenal. These things make me so interested to meet this little one growing inside me. I feel so blessed to have been given a husband who has such an amazing fathering ability.

On Wednesday, we will get to get an in depth look at our little miracle. I'll get to see all those parts which God has fearfully and wonderfully made. I am so excited to see that wee 4 chambered heart, something I have been wanting to lay eyes on since we first knew this gift was coming into our lives. As a cardiac nurse, I can't say that the thought scares me a little, but as a Christian, I need to have peace in the fact that God has brought him or her to this point safely and will continue to provide for us.

So, next week, we'll have a little boy or girl to talk about by name. Clothes to start collecting. All the fun stuff! Jacob and Andrew change their minds every time I talk to them about what they want, sister or brother. This past weekend, Andrew told Jacob he was SO excited to meet his brother or sister so he could "teach 'em stuff". Jacob was slightly concerned that if he had a sister, he wouldn't be able to teach her to burp and make weird body noises. I assured him that sisters were just as capable to learn those skills as brothers were. He seemed fine after that! :)

Liberty and I are having a lazy day. It's 67 degrees outside and beautifully sunny. I ran a few errands this morning and now I'm enjoying the calm breezes and phenomenal temperatures. I go to work tomorrow and work every day until the sono on Wednesday. It's absolutely gonna make time go faster!

Until Wednesday...happy Spring!

Week of craziness!

I am not sure I even had a chance to sit down this week! Whew! Jason and I headed out early Sunday morning for our mini-vacay in where, you ask? Delightful and fabulous LAS VEGAS! We had a simply amazing deal that we couldn't pass up and therefore took the opportunity to rest and relax in the city that never sleeps. We were able to walk up and down the strip, taking in all the opulence that so many people hold dear. Monday night, we went to a Cirque du Soleil show at our hotel. We had gone to one last year, and I thought it was amazing, but Jason really didn't enjoy it. This one was seriously different. It is one of the older Cirque shows, which means it is very VERY typical for the circus like atmosphere. There were so many amazing tricks and bodily feats! I don't know where they find performers like this, but it was simply wonderous to see what the human body is capable of. We both left the show raving and wishing we had the money to see it again! Jason was also able to play golf at a beautiful desert course while we were there. I didn't go with him, but the pictures were absolutely gorgeous. On Tuesday, we headed off the strip over to the Palms for our traditional "fancy" dinner. We ate at a beautiful restaurant and enjoyed the delicious steak and other goodies. While we were there, I saw John Besh, a chef from New Orleans that I've watched on Food Network and Top Chef. I was a tad star-struck! I should have asked for an autograph, but it really was not that kind of restaurant! Wednesday, we headed back home. Jason picked up a very excited Liberty from her Aunt Connie's house the next day and I started off my work week.

Since we were gone for 4 days, I'm not working the mega hours I normally do, but I still think I'm getting in 25 or so. Not bad for having a vacation and having to work! :) I make up for it next week though!

Jacob and Andrew are partying at our house this weekend, which is ALWAYS fun! Yesterday was Jason's birthday, so we celebrated with all his favorites...steak, asparagus, mashed potatoes, and yellow cake with chocolate icing! Delish! The boys have been camping with their mom all week, so I think at Andrew's request, we are going to Guitar Center this afternoon so he can play on the drums since "I'm in withdrawls, Stephanie!" It would be a much better weekend if our air conditioner was working, but in fabulous apartment life fashion, it's OUT AGAIN! Thankfully, when I woke up this morning, it was cool, almost cold in the house and everyone was snuggled up in blankets. I guess I forgot to put Liberty to bed last night because I found her snuggled with Jacob, looking quite guilty as I turned the corner and found her!

In other news, baby is doing well...as far as I know anyways! I haven't felt any movement this week, but I do know that my body parts are starting to shift about more and make me "look" pregnant in certain clothes! I weighed myself this morning and found that I've lost a little weight, but I think that may have been all the walking I did this week. In doing research for bypass patients, I'm still okay as far as weight gain, so I guess I shouldn't worry about it. I know this avocado sized baby is going to catch up in the next few weeks! All my pregnancy apps say that in the next three weeks, the baby is going to more than double in size, going from an avocado to a cantelope! YIKES! I go to the doctor for a regular check up on Tuesday, so we'll see what he says. I am blessed for the moment to have a doctor that has had weight loss surgery, so he is very particular about my special nutritional needs. I was able to stop taking additional iron pills the last time I saw him, so hopefully my levels have remained stable. I do NOT want to have to go that route again! :)

Please keep my sweet little friend K in your prayers. He's been hospitalized for 10 days with a NASTY couple of stomach viruses/bacterias. I know his mom and dad want nothing more for him to be stable enough to take home and away from the other nasty germs that the hospital has. He has made progress over the last few days, and I am so thankful! He is such a sweetheart!

My work schedule is a tad crazy this week, mostly because I'm helping out more at the other clinic and shifting my days to help a co-worker at my clinic. I work Sun/Mon/Wed/Fri/Sat. I'll be ever so thankful to have Tuesday and Thursday for possible sleep and most likely laundry/house cleaning fun!

Have a wonderful week!

Busy week!

Whew! I can't believe it's already Saturday! I'm serious, where does the time go? I worked a lot this week, helping to fill in the gaps for the two clinics and I know it will pay off next week when I get paid!

My energy continues to get better as the days of the exhausting first trimester get farther and farther behind me. I'll be 16 weeks on Tuesday! 4 months down, 5 to go. I know that I'll be able to wrap my head around it much better after I find out who is living inside of me! Just to be able to call him or her by their name and be able to do some concrete planning (and SHOPPING!) will be wonderful! I go to the doctor on the 22nd and I'm excited to hear little one's heart beating happily! THe next milestones I'm excited about are being able to feel the dancing I know is going on in there and actually "looking" pregnant. I'm certain I'll wish I had put those two things off in the middle of the summer when this baby WON'T sit still and I look like a houseboat, but right now, I'm anticipating both!

Jason and I leave for vacation tomorrow and I can hardly wait! It's just a short little trip (Sunday through Wednesday), but it's vacation just the same! Liberty is anxiously awaiting her vacation at Aunt Connie's where she'll no doubt be spoiled and loved on beyond belief. It's always a bit of withdrawls when she comes home, but she LOVES her time being the center of everyone's universe!

After we get home, we will be able to have the boys for a long weekend before they go back to school. I always have SO much fun when they come over! Even if I have to work, it's so sweet when I leave because they always want to know exactly when I'm coming back home! I know Jason wants to take them to play golf one day and we'll probably go roaming around a park on Saturday. I can't wait for us to be living a little closer to them and to see this new little one idolize those big brothers!

I'm finishing up a very quiet yet busy shift this morning. I've got a full house, but everyone seems to need an extra nap today! The lights are down low, the televisions are on Food Network (hey, they chose that, NOT me!), and I'm all caught up on charting. Well okay, I take it back. I just had the NOISIEST patient come in. Everyone else is trying to sleep and he just keeps chattering away! He's sweet at least, so I don't mind...but I can't speak for the rest of the people! :)

Have an absolutely wonderful week...I know I will!

March? Really?

Happy Sunday to you!

I am spending this early morning surrounded by patients and IV poles. It is once again frigid in North Texas, as the weather has changes for the 400th time this week! Two days ago, it was 80. When I got up this morning, it was 32. Awesome.

The past week has been a blur, but it seems like they are all starting to be that way. At the beginning of the week, I was convinced the cold weather was over. It has been near 80 all week and so sunny! Unfortunately, a cold front came through Friday night and we're now cold again. Well, cold for March in Texas that is!

Work is continuing to go well. I really enjoy the nurses I work with and it's proving to be a very good experience. I'm working close to full time hours, which exhausts me, but it's SO amazing to be doing nursing again after my short hiatus.

I also got the opportunity to play with my sweet little friend K and his sister this week! He has grown up so much and it made me tear up a bit to remember being there to tell his parents "we have a heart for your son" and then seeing him as a 3 and a half year old! WOW that makes me feel old. Everytime I go play with him, it makes me laugh because he has such a hilarious personality. This visit was filled with him having adventures all over the house with his two little alien toys. I have no idea what kinds of excitement they got into, but HE did and that was all that mattered. His sister and I were happy to play on the floor in whatever room he was currently adventuring in, and that seemed to be what he wanted us to do!

Jason and I had the opportunity to visit with some friends last night at a joint birthday party for anyone having a birthday in February and March. This party has become a yearly tradition for this group of friends. Every year, it's always fun to see the changes in the group...from relationship status, marriages, and new babies. Wow. Two years ago, I was barely in a new relationship. Last year, I was engaged. This year, expecting a baby. Life is amazing!

This week I've got work busyness and then trying to think about getting ready for Jason and I's trip on Sunday. WHOO HOO! I can't wait! If I could spend my entire year vacationing on someone else's dollar, that would be fabulous. But, since my sweetie and I have to live and work, I'll just be thankful for the vacations we do get to spend together either alone or with the kiddos!

If you have a moment, say a prayer for my sweet sister this week. She's headed back to work after her 3 months of staying home and being a new mommy. I know she's not really very excited about it, and even LESS excited about leaving Aubrey. She's an amazing teacher and I have no doubt she'll fall right back into the groove of things, but right now, she's a little overwhelmed!

Thanks for coming to hang out in my little corner of the web. :)

Home again, home again....

Whew! Can't believe it's almost been a week since I got home from Virginia! Again I ask, where does the time go? Seriously!

I had an absolutely wonderful time with my sister and her family. I got a crash course in being a mommy and loved every minute of it. It's still a weird thought to think of my sister as a mom, but she does a stellar job and she and her husband love that sweet baby to pieces. Aubrey is like a mini-Kim, so it's really funny to see some of Kimberly's personality traits coming out in this almost 3 month old baby! The three of us ventured back to the DC area to take me to the airport and I got to help baby clothes shop. Well, I didn't really help, I just got to hold the baby! Of course, the beauty of being the aunt is that you can just hand the baby back when the diaper explodes!

Since being home, I've been working hard at my new job. I absolutely love this job! It's the perfect combination of highly skilled nursing and hospital busy, but not the stress. I work mainly at one clinic with two other nurses, but help out at the other one when they need it. It started out as being just part time, but I've managed to get full time hours by helping out at the other clinic. It has been an absolute blessing.

Jason and I have started the uber fun task of picking stuff out for wee one Russell. We spent a long time at Target yesterday looking at strollers, car seats, breast pumps, you name it. SO MUCH STUFF! It's insanity that someone who is now 3 inches long and the size of a lemon needs this much gear! I will be 14 weeks on Tuesday....whew! I'm holding myself back from too much shopping until I find out the sex of the baby, which should be at the end of March. The sonographer already says he knows, but I'd rather go with the sono of an older baby! Jason and I have our predictions, but we'll see!

The next few weeks will be busy busy busy! I've got lots of hours scheduled and even some play time with my sweet little friend K and his sister! Jason and I are taking our last just the two of us mini trip for awhile in a few weeks...and I can't wait! We had been saving and pinching for the trip and finally got the last little bit this week. After that, it will be nothing but work and saving for our first family vacation, which will hopefully be to Disney World with the boys in June! It will be an interesting trip, seeing as I'll be about 28 weeks pregnant and not able to go on some of my favorite rides! It won't matter a bit because our two sweet boys have NEVER been there and I will get to see the eyes of a first time Disney experiencer! THAT will be so much better!

Thanks to everyone who has kept this pregnancy in your prayers. So far, I have not had any serious issues and have been blessed to really not have much morning sickness or other issues. My energy gets better by the day! I haven't had any complications from my clotting disorder and our most recent sonogram showed a healthy and active little being. My next focus will be that 18-20 wk sonogam which will not only show the sex, but more importantly, look at that wee forming heart. I have faith that it will be completely normal, but seeing as that my nursing background is in heart defects, I have that in the back of my mind as always being a possibility! God is always in control and He has protected this wee one until now so I know He has the ultimate plan in mind.

Have a wonderful rest of your weekend and a phenomenal week!

Beginnings of my Virginia adventures

Yesterday, I boarded a plane to go meet my beautiful namesake, Miss Aubrey Lynne. As in true Stephanie fashion, the plane trip was quite the adventure. I seriously have NEVER been to Washington DC where I don't have a completely entertaining plane ride. It all started in 2001 when Michael and I went to DC when I had a conference at the Holocaust museum. We actually started a book of all the crazy people we encountered! From the so called African prince at the airport to the really loud pharmacy people at CVS, these are all documented in a spiral notebook (which I think Michael still has). Anyways, this trip was no exception. I sat next to a man who was taking his family to DC for vacation. He drank out of a mystery flask the ENTIRE 2.5 hour flight and subsequently became louder and more boisterous as the flight went on. Towards the end of the flight, he started telling me all about the evils of the American government and how proud he was to be Indian because they gave the world Yoga. It was actually quite sane conversation for someone as trashed as he was! I actually saw him stumbling to the bathroom once in the terminal. Hilarious!

Kim and Aubrey picked me up (WAY past Kim's bedtime!) and we made the 2 hour drive to her house. We spent the day today wandering around shops and experiencing life with a wee infant. From the blowout at Costco to the screaming fit at Target, it was quite the day! It's made me a little more aware of what I am in for! I know Jason knows exactly, but it's one thing to take care of babies at the hospital and then leave them at the end of the day! It's very eye opening! Needless to say, I'm exhausted, but it's a good kind of tired. Aubrey is absolutely precious....smiling and talking (when she's not pooping and eating!).

So now I must shuffle off to bed. I made Kim give me my shot tonight, and she was not thrilled at the prospect, but she did fine. I don't do well giving the shot to myself, which is why I have designated my husband as the shot giver. He does so much better than I do!

It's only 8:10 Texas time. I am pathetic! Good night! :)

Russell family adventures

First of all, let me say that I really need to get working on the "bring your camera" angle. We had such a fun day yesterday and I didn't take a single picture! Bad mom! :)

Jacob and Andrew are here this weekend and we've been having a wonderful time. I got home late on Friday night, but they'd already been adventuring with Jason. Liberty was in dachshund heaven with her two favorite little ones back in the house.

Saturday morning, we woke up for our traditional pancake and bacon breakfast. This is typically the first thing out of their mouths when we pick them up. "Um, do you think we can have pancakes for breakfast?" Hilarious. After breakfast and getting ready (and a rousing game of Just Dance 2!), we headed out to enjoy the absolutely BEAUTIFUL Texas weather. It was a gorgeous 65 degrees with sunny skies and no clouds. We went to the Fort Worth Nature Center and explored all the trails we could find. They even have a little building with a lot of Texas reptiles and fish on display. My favorite was the caged prairie dog. I think that was Liberty's favorite, too. She REALLY wanted in that cage. The park ranger actually came up to me and said "Um, ma'am? Your dog is angering the prairie dog. Can you please remove her?" Yikes. We hiked all over the trails and ended up all muddy, but exhausted. We headed out just as they were closing the gates because after all, "Those left in the park after closing will be locked in overnight". Not an adventure we wanted to partake in!

After the hiking, I of course had three ravenous males on my hands. We fed them and they wanted to go hang out at Jason's dad's house for awhile. I think they love it over there because there's always seeming to be some science experiement with fire. This one involved a windshield wiper fluid bottle, alcohol, and a propane torch. Use your imagination. We were there for several hours before pouring two very tired boys and a comatose Liberty into the car to head home. Once home, we unwound with an episode of Sponge Bob and I think the boys eyes were shut before I even turned out the lights for bed!

Today, I came to work for a few hours, managing to sneak out of the house while everyone was still sleeping. I'm hoping they are getting lots of good sleep after our weekend of adventuring while I am happily giving medicine and sticking people for IV's! Not sure what is planned for the rest of the day, but I do know that Andrew has to finish his Valentines for his class party tomorrow. It's a "sock hop" and he's "encouraged" to dress appropriately! He didn't like Jason and I's suggestion of slicking his hair back, but he might roll up his pants and wear some white socks with his dark dress shoes. Who knows. He's thoroughly convinced that none of his teachers are going to dress up. I told him that I can guarantee they will be dressed up...teachers ALWAYS love a day out of dress code!

I've got work at the beginning of the week, a sono appointment on Wednesday (YAY!), and fly out of here on Thursday for an extended weekend to meet my niece, Aubrey. Whew! I'm going to be busy! :)

Jason surprised me on Friday with a BEAUTIFUL flower delivery of a dozen red roses. I just love my husband so much! It seems weird that we've been married for five months already. It seems like much longer. I still can't believe that we're gonna have a baby in August, but I guess I have a little longer for that to sink in! :)

I continually seem to be amazed at the blessings God has provided to me and my little family. I can not seem to thank Him enough.

New and Different

It has been a wild ride. Almost a year of non stop changes! New job, new marital status, new everything! I am so thankful for the blessings I have been given. I should remember to be more thankful for the hardships I've endured, but that is not always so easy.

And so the new starts again! I have a new job! A NURSING job! I'm working in a clinic giving IV infusions. I start IV's, draw blood, access ports, adn all kinds of fabulous nurse things that I have so desperately missed since July. Right now, it's a part time job, but I have the potential to pick up extra hours at two different clinics. I am hopeful that it is a very good thing for our little family.

Andrew celebrated his 9th birthday last week! My grandma was in town and took everyone to eat Mexican food. It's so fun to see these two precious boys interact with my family. My grandma just doted over them. Jacob and my brother are practically twins (except that my brother has NO musical talent). Andrew just thought it was cool that people brought him presents! I had made him a cake and was thoroughly excited to introduce him to....TRICK CANDLES! The child had NEVER had them before and the look on his face was absolutely priceless. They made such an impression that at his birthday party on Saturday, he had to ask his mom if the candles were regular candle or trick candles! Hilarious!

I am sitting here in shock because I just realized that Tuesday is FEBRUARY! Where did my month go? I think I'm perpetually stuck in a time wharp. Maybe it's because I've been so busy and exhausted that I just haven't had the time to stop and process. Who knows.

Two years ago today, I got my very first email from my sweet husband. I can't believe I am so blessed to have married this wonderful man. If you had asked me on New Year's Day 2009 what I'd be doing in two years, I don't think I could even have guessed that I would be a wife and an automatic mom to two precious boys. I am BLESSED! Haven't I said that already?

More blessings are on the way. I don't exactly know what they are, but I choose to believe that God has His hand on our family. I can only continue to praise him for the wonderful things He has given already and for what is to come.

A Year of New

Happy New Year! Of course, it's 10 days late, but let's just be thankful I blogged in January! :) It's been a quiet year so far, but in true Stephanie fashion, it's destined to get more exciting from here!

I got a promotion at work last week. Well, it's more like being thrown into a position with a wee bit of responsibility. I don't mind. I'm used to a while lot more responsibility than I have now, so a tad more isn't going to kill me. :)

We're slowly looking for a new place to live. I think we're both tired of apartment life, especially since the people who moved in upstairs have brought a herd of raging elephants with them. They seriously have no respect for anyone. On Christmas Eve, Jason and I were trying desperately to wait for the boys to go to sleep so we oculd sneak all their presents to the tree. We couldn't do it because they were involved in some sort of home improvement project at 11:30 at night. It culminated in my going up there, knocking nicely on their door, only to have the woman come to the door and look at me with a stupid look on her face and say "Being a little loud for you?" No, dummy. It's 11:30 at night on CHRISTMAS EVE!!! Needless to say, sometimes, I close a cabinet door a tad louder. And I may even slam a door. But just maybe.

I decided to go back off Diet Dr Pepper, which has been an interesting adventure. I've cut the caffeine way back, mostly doing tea. I drink a bunch of unsweetened decaf tea. I've never really been one to sweeten tea, so moving off artificial sweetners really hasn't been an issue in the tea movement. I think I've done relatively well. :) Maybe I should ask Jason!

It's Jason and I's 4 month anniversary! :) The time has flown by, and even though 4 months doesn't seem like a long time...WOW. God has really taught us so many things about each other, and I can't wait to see what He has in store for us this year.

Christmas fun!

Wow, I'm really not a good married woman blogger, am I? Guess I'll have to work on that!

Christmas was absolutely amazing. Jacob and Andrew were here from the Saturday before and went home yesterday. Our apartment has never seemed so empty. Liberty is sulking because her "little ones" are gone. We had so much fun with those sweet boys! We took amazing pictures in downtown Fort Worth in front of the giant Christmas tree. There was an insane amount of cookie baking. I think we watched all the fabulous Christmas cartoons and kid movies.

Christmas morning, we awoke to two very blessed little boys. My family poured their love and affection all over those kiddos. It was seriously Nerf-a-Palooza. After the Christmas present fun with just us, we got ready and went to dinner with Jason's mother and her side of the family. Liberty had to wear a Santa suit and by about 8PM, was so tired of not having her bed to sleep in, she hid under the Christmas tree and took a nap! Sunday, we relaxed, cleaned up the Christmas mayhem, and headed over to Jason's dad to say hi before they went back to their mom's house.

And as previously stated, Liberty is now moping around the house, watching the door longingly. She keeps sniffing the blankets and wondering why no one is giving her food under the table. It's a hard life for a dachshund.

I'm off today with big plans to watch all the Christmas movies that I knew Jacob and Andrew wouldn't want to watch! I think there will be de-decorating, but I'm trying to put that off as long as possible.

I have a very short work week, which is a blessing. Sometimes, you just need a break, you know?

I would ask your continued prayers for my little family. Jacob and Andrew did not want to go home, and it was so wonderful to have them for the week. We're looking to be up closer to them because they are needing us. A house in their neighborhood or close to it would be absolutely ideal! At this point, any decision we make has them completely 100% in the forefront!

Wow, still can't believe it's almost 2011! What a year this has been, and next year will no doubt be fabulous as well!

Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year from Jason, Stephanie, Jacob, Andrew, and Liberty Russell!

My thoughts.

No, I'm not an employee of a transplant program anymore, but this does not mean I'm not still affected by what goes on. In my three years of employment in that position, plus the two on the heart floor, I came to call many transplant families part of my family. Or to be more specific, they made me part of theirs. I got to celebrate birthdays and anniversaries...of actual birth or the "heart birth".

Transplant is an ever changing science. A new and fabulous medicine is always in the works, but it never changes the fact that you are placing a foreign object in a body that doesn't want it. God created the human body perfectly. It rejects intruders. Even though that beautiful new heart is the gift of life, it is an intruder and the body wants nothing more than to get rid of it.

Transplant families are the strongest I know. They try to make a normal life for their loved one while they face the constant fear that something BAD may happen. They bond together as no one else can...as a clan who has seen their family member sicker than sick and made better by a gift from another person. Of course, this bond also leads them to experience the horror of transplant. The transplant gone wrong. Rejection. Infection. TCAD. Death. But in all of these horrible things and times, they still remain strong. Yes, they may crumble, but in the end, they hold fast because they believe in miracles.

I believe in miracles. I've seen them. I've also seen a "miracle" crumble before my eyes. That does not sway me from my belief that God is always in charge. ALWAYS. It's hard to see God in the crap that this life presents us with, but He's always there.

God will never give us more than we can handle. Ever. He says that, but do we believe it? I believe it. I've experienced it. The last year of my life has proven it.

I am so blessed to have people in my life who love me. I am also blessed to have people who have been through the worst and have seen the beauty that God has provided. Wow. That's a lot of blessings!

I can never thank God enough for the things He has brought to me. Who is that family? It's not just the biological one. It's the man He blessed me with. It's the family that God gave me. It's the transplant families who consider me part of theirs. It's the friends I have known forever who consider me the "aunt" of their kiddos. I am blessed.

That's it. The end.

Hello again! :)

Yep. I'm a Mrs. It has hit me a few times in the last few weeks. It hit me when I was introduced as "This is my wife, Stephanie". It hit me when I got to check "married" on my tax info. It REALLY hit me when I got my new Social Security card with the name STEPHANIE LYNNE RUSSELL! Crazy!

Our wedding was such a beautiful day. I got to say everything I always wanted to the man of my dreams. I got to continue family traditions by kneeling in prayer on the bench that my sister, my mother, and my grandmother kneeled with their husbands on. I was blessed to share the night with my husband and our closest friends. In the end, I look back and know that God has a hand in my life. If I still worked at CMC, I wouldn't have been able to invite some of the patient families that have truly amazed and blessed me. I had all of the people who have seen me from infancy to adulthood all in one room. Jason and I were so thankful to have these people here to celebrate our union.

We had an AMAZING time in Maui. I did not want to come home. I didn't even miss my dog (who would be very upset if she knew this, so don't tell her!). I got to spend 7 days with my fabulous husband swimming, golfing, snorkeling, driving, flying, eating, and just having an amazing time! My aunt let us use her beach front condo and it was so awesome! We rented a convertible mustang and ran around the island feeling fabulous and knowing that we knew NO ONE! :) I am a total foodie (and so is Jason!) and we really had the best time exploring all the fresh seafood that Maui has to offer. Seriously, it was so amazing that I didn't want to come back to lunchmeat and boring food. '

I was so lucky to spend my BIRTHDAY in Maui with my new husband! The night before, he and I went out on the town and had so much fun experiencing all the little cute "dives" in Kihei (the area of Maui where we stayed!). We got fabulous service because we told them it was our honeymoon AND my birthday. What else could a girl ask for? My sweet husband surprised me with a very adorable stuffed dachshund (complete with Hawaiian lei!) and a card. I love that he did that. It absolutely takes the cake as my most favorite birthday.

So now. We're home. We're married. Settling in to married life! Jason is working a different route than normal, but it's seeming to pay off for us! I'm working full time right down the street and they seem to love me! They keep saying I'm above and beyond what they normally get. I don't think this is my forever job, but it's great for the interim while I'm working to get back into the hospital.

We had the boys over this weekend. We had an amazing time! There was golf. There was a cooking lesson. There was church. There was family bonding. Jason and I want SO much to live up by these two precious boys. Please pray for this. They need some stability and a family that says "You matter".

Jason is off making money for our little family. Liberty is mourning the lack of the boys and wishing they were around so they could spoil her ROTTEN. I am wishing our family was together, but praying that one day soon, it will happen. I would hope that you would pray for that too!

Almost!

1 week. 7 days. 168 hours. 10,080 minutes.

I can't believe it is almost here! Jason and I were just talking about this yesterday. I mentioned to someone the other day that I was getting married "in September" and they said, "Um, Steph? It IS September!" It doesn't seem as though seven months have gone by since I saw my sweet fiance on one knee with a precious smile and heard that most beautiful of questions! SO much has changed since then! I am so blessed!

In a week's time, I'll have a new husband. This delights me to no end. I'm ready to be done with all the wedding planning and just have my husband to myself without the dreaded wedding bag, wedding website, or the 10 emails I have to respond to pertaining to wedding stuff.

Today, for the first time in 7 weeks, I'm working! It's not a hard job, but at least I'm able to bring in a little bit of money. Of course, it's also the first day in 4 months that it is sunny and mid-70's outside. I'm sitting behind a desk in front of some big windows that let me see the beautiful sunshine and soft breezes. But, I get to stay inside and answer the phone. And I am thankful.

The day after we get back from Maui (at FIVE AM. Ick.), I am starting a new job. It's not as a nurse or an educator, but a completely un-related field. It's completely a God thing. I was offered the job literally less than 5 minutes after walking out of the office building. Here are the reasons that make me know it's a God thing.
1. It's Monday through Friday, no weekends, little to no overtime.
2. It's TWO minutes away from my house which saves on gas!
3. They wanted me so much that they said I didn't even have to start training until after I get home from our honeymoon.
4. I have the opportunity to show off my organizational skills and experience working with physicians

Isn't that amazing? Right now, it's just a "long term temporary position", but it allows me to figure some things out while having gainful employment. The pay is enough to help with living expenses and allow for some breathing room. The team I'll be working with has two very personable team leaders. I'm not sure how long I'll be doing this job, but I'm very VERY happy about it while it lasts.

I'm so excited to start seeing all the family and friends come in for this fun weekend. I haven't been able to put my hands on my little sister for ELEVEN months and that is WAY too long in my opinion. I've got aunts flying/driving in, friends I haven't seen in months, and that's just my family! Jason's getting excited too! I'm looking forward to introducing Jacob and Andrew to the part of my family that hears me talk about them all the time but hasn't been able to meet them yet! I think they're pretty excited too...they keep asking and making sure they are going to get to meet certain family members.

I doubt I'll be posting again until after I'm a Mrs. You can always find me on Facebook to get the most up to date info and my current moods! Thanks for your prayers and I'll see you soon....as Mrs. Stephanie Russell! :)

And it gets closer...

With less than three weeks until the wedding, my brain is often swimming with many MANY random details. Just when I think I've figured it all out, a new one comes sneaking in to try and stress me out. I refuse to let these take over. Why? Well, if you read my blog, you'll know that I'm desperately holding to the knowledge that September 10th is only the beginning of our story. It's one day in a long LONG adventure that we're planning to have. There's absolutely NO reason to sit and stress over it.

All the big things are done! Bridal pictures. Marriage license. Engagement pictures. Tux rentals. Food choices. 2 of 3 bridal showers. Ta DA! When I type it out like that, it does seem like a big accomplishment! Yay!

The things I'm most excited about are the vows Jason and I will make. The people I'll get to see. The vacation away from the continental US. I made Jason a golf tee time in Maui last week and the woman on the phone said "Thank you, Mrs Russell. We'll see you in a few weeks". Wow. It's crazy to think of myself as a Mrs!

The only big thing I did this week was sell my sweet car. I've been tossing the idea around for several months. Jason has two cars, and there was really no need for me to contribute a third. I happily paid mine off, cleaned her up, and made her all beautiful for a new owner. It was a hard decision, but in the end, it's the best choice.

Jacob and Andrew have been over here this week. We always have a hilarious time. The big hit this week has been "Just Dance" on the Wii. I've had that game for awhile, but have only brought it out in the last week. Jason even made a video and posted it on Facebook of Jacob beating me while dancing to the Spice girls (my pick, not his!). I can't even win a dancing game! They start school next week so we won't have extended weeks with them like in the summer. I may go through withdrawls...I really REALLY have a great time when they're over here.

I guess I should get my rear off this couch and have a productive Saturday. Jason and I are supposed to go on a road trip to get his other car, but that may be postponed. Right now, I'm perfectly content to sit here with my diet dr pepper, a warm and snuggling Liberty, and a book!

Wedding preparation fun!

A month to go! Insanity!

Things are coming together for our grand day on September 10th. In the last two weeks, we've managed to take my bridal portraits, organize the ceremony/reception site and food, find a pastor, take our engagement pictures, finalize flowers and cakes, and start collecting RSVP's! Whew! No wonder I'm exhausted!

I'm still job hunting and wondering what God has next in store for me in my career. It's a really hard lesson to learn, but I'm trying to do it with patience and grace. It's starting to get to the point where I'm wondering how God is going to provide financially, but He will not let me down if I continue to trust. I may not like how it works out, but it will be the best in the long run.

This weekend, I have a bridal shower thrown by Jason's mom. I also am going to help Becca set up and decorate her classroom. It should be relaxing on the wedding front, now that all the big stuff is done! :)

"But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus" ~Philippians 4:19

An earnest request

In the grand scheme of things, my problems are tiny. I have good health, a roof over my head, and people who love me. Most importantly, I am redeemed. I am more blessed than I will ever know.

At the moment, I don't have a job. I left Children's in April to find out what God wanted for me in my nursing career. I did home health for a few months, and now have moved on from that. I'm desperately trying to get a job in a hospital, but to no avail. I have lots of experience, but apparently am un-hireable at this time.

Five weeks before our wedding is not a convenient time to be out of work. What is God trying to teach me right now? Patience? How to remain faithful through times of trial? How to get by on nothing? I have no idea at this time, but I'm eager to find out what He has in store for me.

I would ask for your prayers in this situation. Not necessarily for me to find a job, but for God's plan to be worked out perfectly as it always is. For me to sit by and trust that He is never going to give me more than I can handle? Perhaps. I have no idea. All I can do is pray and seek out His plans for my life. And eat ramen noodles in the process! :)

Thank you in advance for lifting me up. I know He is going to be glorified in the answer to these prayers.

Today in the life

Today has been an interesting day. I found out from a job that I thought I had an "in" that I don't. I took Liberty to the dog park and she acted like a fool. I watched Chopped with my aunt. It was all in all a good day. It had moments of disappointment, but I am so loved by my family and friends that I feel eternally blessed.

I haven't worked for two weeks because my patient is in the hospital and some other issues. I am praying daily for a position in a hospital where I can bless my patients with my skill and caring. I'd love if you prayed that too!

I'm getting married in six weeks. 45 days from today. It seems like it is all snowing in on me and I MUST remember that Jason and I will be pledging to each other in six weeks and then that makes it better! :)

Tomorrow, my mother is coming to town and we have such an agenda! We are meeting with the Tribute at 1 and then going to pick up my dress at 4! Thursday, I have no idea, but I am hoping that we can meet up with Jason, Jacob, and Andrew for dinner....and maybe buying school backpacks! Friday...the BIG day. Bridal portraits! I LOVE my sweet hair dresser CARINA (at Salon Pompeo at Mockingbird) and she will be doing my hair at 9AM and then we are headed to have pictures taken. I have no idea how fabulous I will be, but I hope that my pictures will be beautiful for my husband to see!

I would covet your prayers for the following week. I am still waiting on interviews from last week that will hopefully end in a job opportunity for me! I appreciate your prayers and good wishes for the coming week!

A new favorite!

I found this song this morning whilst driving around DFW on my bridal fitting errands. It's amazing to me...

"We will rise and we will fall" God lets us go through these trials and moments of perfection.

"The glory is YOURS alone" God knows what is to happen in my life. I can only be blessed because He has chosen me.

Enjoy!

Aaron Shust - To God Alone (2009 Video & Lyrics)

And the days speed on by...

Seven weeks and counting. Fifty one days. Is time really going by this quickly? It almost seems unreal! Things are starting to come together at lightening speed. Our invitations went out Monday. RSVP's are starting to come in. I've got my bridal portraits next week. Engagement pictures will be following soon. We have a meeting to finalize all the Tribute details next week. Tux fittings have started. Final payments are due in about a month. WOWSERS.

I'm desperately trying to not get bogged down in all the details because when it comes right down to it, the details are unimportant. What IS important are the vows that Jason and I will stand up and say in front of God, our families, and our friends. It is important to start our lives together with the proper foundation. Whether or not the flowers get there on time or centerpieces are perfect is all fluff!

Last week, our little family had quite the fun time! Andrew had a golf tournament (he got 6th place! YAY!). Jacob and I scared off squirrels and other wild life whilst careening around the course. Tuesday, we all went to Six Flags! I seriously haven't been there since Becca and I had season passes one summer. That summer, I went so many times that I got TOTALLY Six Flags'd OUT and haven't been back! We had a great time, even though it was 102 degrees in the shade! I think we probably all lost a few pounds with all the sweat! I got my roller coaster fix and was completely amazed how much easier it is to go to an amusement park at my size! I didn't get asked to get off ANY ride and no one came and attacked me with their little size brick thing (if you've been big and ridden on Titan, you know exactly what I'm talking about!).

This weekend, I was blessed to go to Houston and take part in my first bridal shower! The ladies of my parents church (most of whom have known me since I was about 2!) hosted a shower for me on Sunday afternoon! It was quite the experience to be at a shower for ME! I've been to SO many and hosted SO many and it was odd to have the shoe be on the other foot. Jason and I got many beautiful things and I'm excited to have them in wherever we end up! I've extended the lease here in Euless for 3 additional months so we don't have to move AND get married within a few weeks. It will put us with a lease expiring in the middle of November so if you know anyone in North Tarrant county with a nice and inexpensive house to rent, we'd love to take them up on that after November 11!


This week I think I'm going to start school supply shopping for Jacob and Andrew. Jason and I printed off their lists tonight and I got giddy with the thought of crayons and number 2 pencils. We did find it funny that the kids are now having to provide things for the teachers besides the typical construction paper and kleenex. Andrew's list asked him to bring post it notes! I KNOW they aren't using them in his classroom, but I'm certain his teacher is! Scandalous!

Thanks for all the prayers for my job situation. I'm still at an impass at what to do. I've been to several interviews and am praying long and hard that God will lead me to exactly what he wants me to do. It's a hard lesson to learn.

Please keep my new little family in your prayers as the wedding gets closer. Jason and I are doing pre-marital counseling and I know that is going to be SO good to do! We covet your prayers!