Sorrow and joy.

My job is emotionally draining. I absolutely love being with my families...to see them go through all the steps of becoming new parents to having their child operated on and finally get to go home. I do not love when they move into the realm of having to say goodbye to their precious child. I sat in a room today when a patient was lovingly ushered into the arms of Jesus. What a precious moment...and yet, so devastating. I have taken care of that child since she was born, and she passed on right after her 1st birthday. What a truly humanizing experience it is to be with someone when they are saying their final goodbyes...and so humbling as well. The amazing fact is that they wanted us all there. They felt they needed the support of those who loved them and their child. You've never seen grief until you've seen someone actively lose a child. It's heartbreaking and tearjerking. There was not a dry eye in the room..nurses..chaplain..techs..doctors. Even now, I still am in absolute awe of the entire situation. All we could do was tell these parents how much we loved the child, and all they could do was to thank us for all we did for her. What an amazing family. I am so thankful that I have another nurse working with me today, or else I would have had to go home. I had nasty raccoon eyes. EW!

Other than that, I've just been doing nothing but working. This week has been much more relaxed than last, and I am so thankful for that! I don't work until Saturday, and I plan to do nothing but deprogram during the break! This weekend should be quiet, since it's a holiday. Of course, now that I say that...the weekend will be icky! I just love to jinx myself!

Must return to work...do I have to?